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Young female Teachers- and teenage boys

Discussion in 'Behaviour' started by justme29, Mar 8, 2008.

  1. eha


    Post 40:
    Yes, all of these are the rational ways of dealing with what can be a very tricky situation. However: all of them depend on the support you're likely to get from your workplace. What if there's a certain amount of shall we say, ambiguity in the attitude of staff and parents to this kind of thing? I've been in situations where the voicing of a complaint would be used against the plaintiff: s/he would become the target of undermining gossip about how s/he 'had no sense of humour';was 'oversensitive','neurotic',
    'didn't understand young people' --- oh, a selection of reactions to prevent his/her complaint being taken seriously. As for the parents--- well, there are parents who back their kids in incidents of physical abuse against teachers: are they likely to be bovvered about a few 'jokey' remarks?
  2. Hi,
    I'm writing a feature about teachers who are sexually harassed by their pupils or those who have to handle inappropriate comments etc. I’m keen to find out how extensive this is and what can be done about it.

    Many thanks, Hannah
    (Writer, TES Magazine)

  3. Tom_Bennett

    Tom_Bennett Occasional commenter

    Hi Hannah
    Sent you some feedback to your e-mail.
  4. I think it's ok to suggest strategies to the "come out to dinner with me, miss" type comments, but surely anything of a sexual nature should be dealt with seriously (going to parents or letting them know it is being reported to SMT and next time a comment of that nature is made to any teacher it will go to parent and/or detention with senior staff). If they get away with it with their teacher, than surely you are risking they carry on with that sort of behaviour to girls in their peer group.
    I don't usually get hot under the collar about 'politically correct' stuff, but there was a survey out last week about the vast number of teenage girls who have suffered abuse from boyfriends. I know the survey may be complete rubbish, but it is not something I would like to risk.
    I have teenage boys and they take more notice of their teachers than of me, certainly as role models. One commented recently that one department in school had a beer fridge, and therefore they were fun but didn't take their job that seriously. Teachers' reactions and behaviour have a big impact on children, including the other 29 observing the miscreant.
  5. im in year 9 and all the lads fancy one of the art teachers one boy shouted in a lesson "your fit"
    really the sort of thing to do in a lesson!
  6. BigFrankEM

    BigFrankEM Established commenter

    I presume this is written by " a parent", rather than by "a teacher."

    The final sentence does not ring true with me. Anything but.

    In England, in the round, teachers as rôle models come somewhere below....

    Who shall I suggest? The caretaker? The lollypop lady?

    As for the second sentence of the final paragraph: where do I start?
  7. Whether it's an inappropriate comment in front of the class or a comment to me or about me I find 'that is not appropriate' with a stern look works quite well!! For some things when it's a sexual reference (i've had a kid ask me what circumsision is before - I teach music!) sometimes a matter of fact answer will suffice (without blinking or showing a hint of embarassment!)
    It gets easier with experience to be honest.
    also if it crosses a line I think phoning parents/taking it to SMT is definitely the way to go.
    If you are lucky enough to be young and good looking I would say you *do* have to err on the side of caution and make sure you do not behave in a way that can be mis-construed as flirty or even 'friendly'. As others have said, gossip can ruin careers and also kids eventually take advantage of teachers who they think of as 'friends' even if at first they behave!
  8. Emii

    Emii New commenter

    This kind of thing terrifies me. One of my male year 11 pupils' behaviour has recently become much more relaxed/flirtatious around me, to the point that to get my attention he tapped me on the head with his coursework. As I was caught completely off-guard, naturally I looked shocked and I gave him a verbal 'don't do that, it's not appropriate' warning before taking his coursework to check.
    Hindsight always being 100% clearer, I should have come down on him like a tonne of bricks. This is something I'll be doing if he acts so familiarly again... but the idea that he might still do this is, quite frankly, frightening to the point of upsetting.
    Does anyone else get scared by these scenarios?

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