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Where do we go from here?

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by Kismet, Feb 17, 2011.

  1. Dear John,
    I've worked in education (mainly FE, HE, WBL, SEN) for the past 17 years in a variety of roles, with a variety of learners. I went into my first management role 10 years ago and to be brutally honest, I'm not an excellent teacher, I'm average. I didn't really enjoy the marking (I'm an English specialist) who does? But I've kept my hand in by marking exam papers each year, which is the marking, but without the students and the politics of working in a college. Due to changes in my health, I don't think I could go back into teaching full time and I think I would soon become as disillusioned as I am in my current role.
    I am, however, good at curriculum design, which is what my current job supposedly involves, along with the management skills. I started this job nearly 4 years ago and after 3 months I knew it was the biggest mistake of my life. I've tried, desperately, to become employed elsewhere, but I'm no longer sure I want to work in education in any form. My husband is an FE lecturer and the most rewarding thing I have done over the past 6 years was to help him develop a new course by assisting him to design classroom activities which were student centred and which differentiated skill level, but still taught the syllabus he had to do. This is a vocational course and it interested me far more than the WBL I have to manage the design of in my day to day job, which is impacted by micro-management, back-biting, dishonesty and b*llsh*t.
    The sad reality is, my face doesn't fit in my organisation, which I know I have contributed to as I am too honest, too direct and feel that people should be treated fairly and equally. However, my line manager is a bully, I've been off work with work-related stress for 6 months already and am probably likely to go off again very soon. 3 years ago I was diagnosed with a chronic disease which means that I will be disabled for the rest of my life and I just feel so tired of life.
    My work situation obviously has a negative impact on my health. My health deteriorating obviously has a negative impact on the rest of my life. I'm blessed with a supportive partner, but I'm not sure I want to put up with constant criticism I face every day, 99.99% of which is unwarranted and comes from malice. I'm at breaking point. We face redundancies anyway, but my short length of service means that I can't volunteer as it's restricted to long-termers. The way things are going at the moment, because I've been placed on poor performance (the first time in any job I've ever had), it looks like I will be fired.
    There are a number of issues for me. Firstly, I don't know what else I could do and I can't see the wood for the trees at the moment. I don't know if there is anything out there which can help me identify an alternative career which I can apply my qualifications and skillset to? I am at the very final stages of completing a Masters Degree, which has taken me nearly 8 years to complete due to ill-health and previous redundancy, which I have fully funded myself, but I'm not sure I'm going to use now because it's in Education. I have QTLS from IFL, as an FE lecturer who qualified in advance of the requirement. I've tried to keep my CPD up to date, but have been blocked at every turn by doing anything vaguely interesting by my line manager, who deems it not relevant to my job role. In the past 4 years, I feel that I have been de-skilled and that now I am virtually unemployable. Clearly my current circumstances mean that I am likely to lose my job either through redundancy or being fired, so a reference will be out of the question.
    The next issue for me is that my earnings are very good. Although I hate my job, hate my line manager and can't see a way out, my lifestyle is founded on my current earnings. We have discussed changes to this and downsizing, which may come anyway as a result of my disability, which may eventually make it impossible for me to work at all. I'd like to work for myself, instead of work for bosses who are incompetent and see me as a threat, but I'm anxious about self-employment as I don't know whether I've got anything to offer anyone and I don't know what I can do to at least see if this is the way I should go.
    I know I sound like a bit of a wet weekend, and I'm not normally so indecisive, but I'm really struggling with these bigger issues and problems, as I have to focus my energies on my day to day survival and trying not to go under. I know I've been avoiding addressing these issues, but I need to do so, but don't know where to start.
    Is there anything you can suggest, e.g. any resource that I could access to try to give me a clear way forward?
    Many thanks
     
  2. Dear John,
    I've worked in education (mainly FE, HE, WBL, SEN) for the past 17 years in a variety of roles, with a variety of learners. I went into my first management role 10 years ago and to be brutally honest, I'm not an excellent teacher, I'm average. I didn't really enjoy the marking (I'm an English specialist) who does? But I've kept my hand in by marking exam papers each year, which is the marking, but without the students and the politics of working in a college. Due to changes in my health, I don't think I could go back into teaching full time and I think I would soon become as disillusioned as I am in my current role.
    I am, however, good at curriculum design, which is what my current job supposedly involves, along with the management skills. I started this job nearly 4 years ago and after 3 months I knew it was the biggest mistake of my life. I've tried, desperately, to become employed elsewhere, but I'm no longer sure I want to work in education in any form. My husband is an FE lecturer and the most rewarding thing I have done over the past 6 years was to help him develop a new course by assisting him to design classroom activities which were student centred and which differentiated skill level, but still taught the syllabus he had to do. This is a vocational course and it interested me far more than the WBL I have to manage the design of in my day to day job, which is impacted by micro-management, back-biting, dishonesty and b*llsh*t.
    The sad reality is, my face doesn't fit in my organisation, which I know I have contributed to as I am too honest, too direct and feel that people should be treated fairly and equally. However, my line manager is a bully, I've been off work with work-related stress for 6 months already and am probably likely to go off again very soon. 3 years ago I was diagnosed with a chronic disease which means that I will be disabled for the rest of my life and I just feel so tired of life.
    My work situation obviously has a negative impact on my health. My health deteriorating obviously has a negative impact on the rest of my life. I'm blessed with a supportive partner, but I'm not sure I want to put up with constant criticism I face every day, 99.99% of which is unwarranted and comes from malice. I'm at breaking point. We face redundancies anyway, but my short length of service means that I can't volunteer as it's restricted to long-termers. The way things are going at the moment, because I've been placed on poor performance (the first time in any job I've ever had), it looks like I will be fired.
    There are a number of issues for me. Firstly, I don't know what else I could do and I can't see the wood for the trees at the moment. I don't know if there is anything out there which can help me identify an alternative career which I can apply my qualifications and skillset to? I am at the very final stages of completing a Masters Degree, which has taken me nearly 8 years to complete due to ill-health and previous redundancy, which I have fully funded myself, but I'm not sure I'm going to use now because it's in Education. I have QTLS from IFL, as an FE lecturer who qualified in advance of the requirement. I've tried to keep my CPD up to date, but have been blocked at every turn by doing anything vaguely interesting by my line manager, who deems it not relevant to my job role. In the past 4 years, I feel that I have been de-skilled and that now I am virtually unemployable. Clearly my current circumstances mean that I am likely to lose my job either through redundancy or being fired, so a reference will be out of the question.
    The next issue for me is that my earnings are very good. Although I hate my job, hate my line manager and can't see a way out, my lifestyle is founded on my current earnings. We have discussed changes to this and downsizing, which may come anyway as a result of my disability, which may eventually make it impossible for me to work at all. I'd like to work for myself, instead of work for bosses who are incompetent and see me as a threat, but I'm anxious about self-employment as I don't know whether I've got anything to offer anyone and I don't know what I can do to at least see if this is the way I should go.
    I know I sound like a bit of a wet weekend, and I'm not normally so indecisive, but I'm really struggling with these bigger issues and problems, as I have to focus my energies on my day to day survival and trying not to go under. I know I've been avoiding addressing these issues, but I need to do so, but don't know where to start.
    Is there anything you can suggest, e.g. any resource that I could access to try to give me a clear way forward?
    Many thanks
     

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