Not sure if anyone can help or if I need to think this through myself, but I just don't know what to do. In short, through a number of accidental discoveries over the last week or so, I have come to the conclusion that my OH is a closet gay. We have been married for years and have a family, and although things have not been easy for some time, I had absolutely no idea. I am feeling so shocked and numb over the whole thing I don't know what to do. He is dominant. I have always been at fault whenever we've had differences,and I have learned that it is better to take the blame and move on, rather than try and argue my case. I think my reaction to his attitude over the years has had an effect on my self esteem. I don't know what his reaction will be if I confront him with what I know. I know that he has been browsing gay sites on the internet and has been communicating by email with a man, and that the two of them have met once and he wants to meet him again. I know that nothing physical has happened yet. It seems that he is wanting friendship/relationship without jeapordising his marriage. I am not sleeping well and my appetite has gone. I was off work with stress/depression a while ago, and although I did get back to work and have been ok, I feel I'm sliding back down and I don't want to go there again as it was an awful time. I think I'm frightened of his reaction. I don't know whether to confide in someone I know, so I could talk through about what I might say or do, but all our friends are mutual and it also seems like a betrayal of his privacy. There's so much to think about here - any suggestions where I might get help? At the moment I am thinking I want out but there's so much at stake.