Not so much a dilemma as an observation I have had some younger teachers chatting to me about their involvement in various extra curricula activities: musical, skiing, debate etc. Everyone of them has said their spouses, partners and families were starting to get annoyed or were very much already annoyed with the time they were committing to the activities and 'other people's kids' while they hardly saw them or saw them knackered and grumpy. I don't really do any of this anymore, I used to but I now work to live, not the other way round. If there were no book trawls, learning walks, data inputting/analysis etc maybe these younger teachers would be at home (and actually present not marking) and these extra activities would go unnoticed. Can this be maintained? Yes enrichment is important but if you are harassed and micro-managed why would you? I wonder if such activities have declined? I know of several English teachers who will only take kids to a matinee of a play because of the other pressures. I feel intently sorry for those involved. I especially feel for those family members that have been pushed to the point of having to say they are angry or annoyed. We all know how awful it is to teach in many schools at the moment but do we stop to think of the families and partners who never see their partner or they see a crouched figure marking, followed by snoring before going out early the next day for more of the same? I would always choose family and my other half over. Maybe you really can't have a life when you teach.