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When someone is manipulative

Discussion in 'Personal' started by Doitforfree, Nov 10, 2015.

  1. Doitforfree

    Doitforfree Star commenter

    How do you deal with a very manipulative person? Or, rather, how do you deal with other people who allow themselves to be manipulated and don't see what is happening? I'm in a difficult situation with two friends, one of whom (A) manipulates and the other (B) who feels sorry for the manipulator (crying is one of her tactics) so allows her to do it and thinks anyone who doesn't is mean. I feel like a monster for not doing what friend A wants, and frustrated with friend B for being so spineless (kind? Gullible?); she expects everyone to be pushed around so as not to make friend A upset.
  2. Vladimir

    Vladimir Senior commenter

    Don't get involved. Really.
    grumpydogwoman likes this.
  3. Eureka!

    Eureka! Lead commenter

    I become more helpful when I think I can do some good.
    I won't put in much effort if I think I'm wasting my time - and will give reasons.
    I will let others know this, one way or another.
    Stay friendly, but honest in tone.
    grumpydogwoman likes this.
  4. lindenlea

    lindenlea Star commenter

    You can't let someone manipulate you but as for your friend - she'll have to make her own choices and if she thinks you're mean, well, so be it. Hopefully there is someone who sees it from your POV so you don't think you're losing your marbles.
    InkyP and grumpydogwoman like this.
  5. kibosh

    kibosh Star commenter

  6. Doitforfree

    Doitforfree Star commenter

    We're all in the same choir and unfortunaely friend A is trying to manipulate many people in the choir to get what she wants. I can't just walk away but you're right Lindenlea, worrying about being thought mean shouldn't affect what I do. I'll stay strong!
    lindenlea likes this.

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