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What do you wish you could tell parents about school?

Discussion in 'Primary' started by educationwriter, Nov 2, 2010.

  1. forfree - the next installment will be the what parents would like to say to teachers! I am looking forward to that too.
    This has been fun to research and write. I'll post a link once it's online.

    Can anyone answer that question earlier as a favour, about target setting. Should all Y1 kids have targets set for them or is it an optional thing?
  2. I hate being tapped on the shoulder! I "woof" at the child (with a smile on my face) and say, "I have a name, and I'm not a dog!". I also frequently say "yes, boy" to a young boy who calls me teacher, again with a smile. He stops to think, and then gives me a smile back and calls me by my name!
  3. marymoocow

    marymoocow Star commenter

    Of course your 3 year old swears, it probably has something to do with you having a pet name for him of K**b head.
    Having a social worker isnt normal and most people would be too embarrassed to anounce their visit infront of other parents.
    Most people do work and many earn the same as or only slightly more than benefits, many of them are TAs working with your children.
    Dont give your children dummies, babies bottles, fail to toilet train them before school and bring them in buggies, they are 4 years old not babies.
    Having 5 children to 5 fathers is not normal and means you are either incredibly thick and dont know what contraception is for or incredibly needy. Grow up and if all else fails keep your legs crossed.
    Funny how I never needed to say these things at my last school in a leafy suburb!
  4. Loved the post Beestoni! Also , you could add that having a birthday is not a reason to take your child out of school for 3 days even if your relatives do live at the other end of the country - especially if your child has just been selected for 1:1 tutoring (in year 6) and you have just arranged a tutor to start the week you plan to be away!
  5. Will read the next thread with interest Writingabouteducation! Although, as these postings illustrate, a lot of parents have no problems getting whatever they feel like saying off their chests, so I doubt there will be anything we haven't all heard at one time or another.[​IMG]
  6. Had a great one this week. Note in the register "Darling is off today with sickness bug". Monday - are you feeling better? "Yeah, been camping at the seaside. Was great fun". LOL! We always find out the truth.
  7. Oh for goodness sake...get a sense of humour. Are you a teacher or a saint!
  8. This forum is all about a good sense of humour
  9. Sorry...that was for a post waaaay back from the MFL teacher..didn't realise the reply would be so far back in the line.
    I have been laughing out loud at most of these posts.
  10. ..............if you are late bringing your child in please don't think you are making up their lost learning time by arriving exactly the same number of minutes you were late when picking them up............
    ..........please don't arrange your driving lessons to coincide with the end of the school day.......
    ........... don't take time off to go on holiday ,buy tap shoes, or fail to come in because it is raining..........how would you feel if I did?
    ..........homework is not a child-minding exercise..........some input at least will be required from you
    .........I do NOT have time to fill 30 party bags with a dozen different items that you couldn't be bothered to do yourself
    .........your child plays in a playground with 120 other children.............accidents ARE going to happen from time to time..........
  11. Waterfin

    Waterfin New commenter

    I don't care that you have 5 kids....find the time to listen to your child read.
    How on Earth is it that you can get to work, looking immaculate and ready to teach your own class in a school local to mine, but that your own child never has their coat/lunch money/PE kit/Reading book and has yet to hand in a single piece of homework yet this term?
    When you come in ranting that YOUR child hasn't remembered to do THEIR homework, how is it MY fault?
    I don't care if you are a doctor, for God's sake wear a higher cut top when you come in for parents' evening.
    Spelling lists, like reading books, are not a competition. If your child has been told to learn the first 2 sets of the words, it is right for their ability and forcing them to learn all sets won't help anyone. They certainly won't remember them by next week.
    Counting up in 2s, 3s etc is not the same as helping your child recite their tables.
    I can't believe that I have had to buy toddler plug covers because your y6 child decided to try and stick a pair of scissors in the socket (and you should be grateful that I stopped him in time).
  12. nick909

    nick909 Star commenter

    Your child spends approximately 15% of its waking life in school. If you even think of trying to pin any of its issues on us, then you're clearly going to have quite a struggle on your hands
  13. Great post. I'm a parent, foundation degree student in education and a parent volunteer at children's school. I so wish that other parents would just take a step back for once and try to put themselves in your shoes and see how it feels to have a room full of hyperactive 5 year olds. Trying to get them to learn aything sometimes is impossible so teachers have my absolute respect no matter what age they teach. I love what teaches are trying to achieve with their pupils - just wish more parents would let them get on with the job.
    P.S. As an after thought would more teachers appreciate a good bottle of vino as a present for Xmas or is this encouraging "binge drinking" for teachers. I once gave a teacher a bottle of red and she was so grateful - made a nice change from all the smellies and cups you normally get. Just a thought - let us know your favourite gifts; might be useful for us parents to use.
  14. theNavigator

    theNavigator New commenter

    What a brilliant thread!! Most of the suggestions suit secondary too - with bells on!
    I have a number of Primary-teaching friends, and I have total respect for you all!!
    Please add...

    1. Just because your child (scrote) has moved to secondary, does not mean you can abdicate all responsibility for their continued development.
    2. There is NO money for school trips to Stratford. We live near the top of Scotland. You want it, you pay for it. SOB! WAIL! (I think it's awful too)
    3. If you are a parent who actually pays attention, you have my complete respect. Some of you are a delight, particularly those with a sense of humour and a refreshingly realistic outlook on life.
    4. If you do not make your child come to school, he will not pass his exams. He will end up as an alcoholic bum. Simples.
    5. The homework is not "too easy" for him. I will do as you request and "give him more homework" when he actually bothers to complete any.
    6. Stop blaming the primary school for "not understanding" your child's challenging behaviour. Your child severely damaged his peers eductaional progress and it is YOUR fault for not giving him any boundaries when he was small, and putting your latest boyfriend, pub buddy or fix ahead of him. Our secondary school is not impressed - he will learn to control himself or he will end up in a bin.
    7. I actually really enjoy parents evening (great craic with decent parents) but could more of you turn up please, so that we can agree positive strategies and you can get to know the person who is teaching your precious child. Not turning up does rather suggest that you don't give a monkeys about them. If parents from the Fair Isle can take a 5 hour boat journey across the North Sea to attend their children's parents evening in Shetland, then you can drive 5 minutes up the road to converse with me.
  15. theNavigator

    theNavigator New commenter

    Oh, and...

    8. Stop relying solely on Primary teachers for Reading. My parents were reading me The Lord of the Rings when I was 4. Granted, the Primary 1 teacher told them off for teaching me how to read and write before I got to school. Not everyone is perfect.
    Get them to read out menus, product names in supermarkets, roadsigns, whatever! Have you any idea just how much Primary teachers have to shoe-horn into a week?? TALK to your child.
  16. wellingtonboot

    wellingtonboot New commenter

    I do appreciate that your daughter was still a teenager when she had her son, and that she had a difficult time having him, and that your grandson is the apple of your eye and the son you never had. However, it is his mother that I wish to discuss his progress with, not you...

    I do realise that we don't teach maths like we did when you were at school.

    Yes, I know that you were a parent helper in Key Stage 1 (the Y2 teacher warned me about you), and that you single-handedly taught all the children in the class to read. I've asked you to come in just once a week this year because I haven't got time for in-depth discussions about the latest story about education in The Mail at break-time every day; I have lessons to set up in that time. If you want to cut it back to once a fortnight, I think we will cope somehow.
    And I am aware of the lack of support from all the other parents in this town for their children's education. Actually "all" is an exaggeration; there are some very supportive parents, but they are not the ones you gossip with on the playground. However, I think my teaching qualification and 20 years experience will help me decide which table to sit your child on - it's not with my most able writers because he is just not working at that level. Oh, and I do privately agree with your analysis of your neighbour's parenting methods, but I won't be telling you that. And their child will still be in my top group for Literacy because that is the right group for them.

    It's an end of term play with a cast of 8-year-olds. If you expect High School Musical, you are going to be disappointed.

    If you knew your child would lose their brand-new, unnamed Manchester United football kit, why on earth did you pack it for the school trip?
  17. These comments are great.
    One I heard years ago went something like, "If you believe half of what your child says about school, I'll believe half of what they say about home."

  18. theNavigator

    theNavigator New commenter

    I love these!
    This thread is useful, not just for the amusement value, but also for what we can learn about our society.

    Having just taught my senior class, I feel the need to unload, so please accept my apologies...

    9. Your child is not capable of doing the Highers course. He can't spell, can barely construct a coherent sentence and is usually absent. B**ger educationalists - there IS a 'ceiling'.

    10. YOU may be living vicariously through your child's experience as you barely managed to finish high school, but SHE is not bothered about passing this course.

    11. No, I will not be giving your child more Hghers homework - you force her to compete in sporting events and long training sessions every spare minute of her time. She is exhausted. She falls asleep in class. WHEN is she supposed to write and essay about "Hamlet"?

    12. Once again, TALK with your child. At least make some effort to encourage them to think for themselves. Do try not to impress your crazy Daily Mail, racist, sexist, homophobic, whateverist upon your innocent babe. It is tedious and you are a peasant. My family used to hunt peasants for sport. Don't tempt me.
  19. Tildabe

    Tildabe New commenter

    Your child is neither gifted nor talented. Yes he is a product of you as parents and your obsessive home schooling does mean that he can do any arithmetic sum in a fraction of the time that I can, and yes he does occasionally use absurd words in his literacy that I have never heard of before but that does not mean he has a natural flare, it means he is well practiced. Furthermore, he is incapeable of creativity on any level and his higher level thinking skills are some of the weakest in the class - I have no doubt that he could recite a large science textbook but it does not mean he understands any of it. He is not the brightest child in my class, infact there are several children who, albeit less practised and perhaps unfamiliar with some concepts (as they have not had the advantage of regular home tutoring), are indeed far more able and talented than he is. He could learn a lot from these children and yes they are doing the same work as your son but that is because it is the appropriate level of work for their, and your son's, ability.
    On the occasions where your child has delared that the work is far too easy and has consequently been set a slightly more challenging task he has found it too difficult and struggled to achieve. There is only one of me in the class so my attention and support has to be divided fairly and equally so provided 1 on 1 support so that your child can do more challenging work is not currently an option.
    Finally, a significant part of every childs primary education is their social skills and ability to interact, work with and share ideas with others. You child is well below average in these aspects of his education and given that in your opinion he is finding work too easy perhaps this is an area he should be looking to improve on.

    Phew, rant over! *and breathe*
  20. This thread is absolutely genius! I'm not even in teaching, yet, and it's given me a good laugh!

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