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Discussion in 'Personal' started by Shedman, Aug 16, 2019.
Dunno about that. They must go along with it from more than indulgence, appeasement and patronisation if there's any hope for the marriage. Starstruck groom, oneupmanship and snobbery probably account for it asmuch as the bride.
And dont get me started on the one-week stag do to Turkey, which Son1 recently declined on grounds of childcare problems, but which he really thought was a colossal cheek and waste of money, and wondered if his liver was still up to it.
Traditionally, couples used to fast from the night before their wedding, only breaking the fast after their vows.
Personally, I think it best to enter married life on a full stomach.
No choice if it was a nuptial mass.
Any wedding where doves or butterflies are released makes me want to start slashing guts.
The wedding indusry isn't insane at all, but its customers probably are.
It's all a bit like buying into the notion that if you pay a fortune, you can have the "Best Christmas Ever!"
It's fantasy stuff which raises expectations beyond what can reasonably be achieved and invariably creates problems somewhere along the line.
There's a simple truth about marriage which applies to all relationships. People will stay together if they want to. Marriage doesn't alter that truth in any way.
My first marriage probaby cost a fair bit, although it wasn't an overly extravogant affair. My bride's parents called in a few favours to help keep the cost down, such as asking a cousin who was a chef if he would make the wedding cake. I was told it was the finest wedding cake anyone had eaten. I was asked if the band I was in would provide the music, which they were kind enough to do, albeit they roped me in to help out with some of the songs. all the same, the cost would have run into several thousands of pounds.
The marriage lasted for a third of my life by the time we split. It sounds a lot, but we were young when we married.
My sweetheart and I have been together for 34 years and married for 32 of them. The wedding was a simple affair with fewer than 10 guests. If it cost us three hundred quid including the curtain ring, I would probably be overstating it.
We've never been short of topics to have blazing rows over, but thankfully the cost of getting tangled up together has never been one of them.
34 years together. That takes some thinking about where the time went, don't it? It'll only be another six years before she expects me to lay on a party and sing this.
Not a Brummie then. The meals go
Breakfast, Dinner, Tea, Supper
I’d tell Sharon to Shove It.
Oh dear - I'm so sad to hear how all of this is turning out. It could have been such a happy event - but human nature is always human nature and this is spoiling the event.
Maleficent is discussing colour schemes. I have been directed to buy suitable suits.
Why must you draw my attention to these things?
Because the days of famine will follow quickly?
Coming stag event is pizza in Belfast and entertainment for the young folk. I have some elderly support and we might slope off to The Spaniard or Bittles (Shakespeare in my youth) while others go to Voodoo (Hannigans Tudor Lounge in my day) 24th August in case anyone is near those establishments in the evening. I will be in jockstrap and seaboots.
The whole wedding business is a rip off. A friend had a birthday party at the same venue as my son’s reception a few weeks later. Little difference in size of party and almost the same food. The w word wasn’t mentioned so she spent over £1000 less. PS: the wedding cake was less than the difference.
The best wedding I ever went to was in Bromley register office with a meal at Rules in central London afterwards. We walked to the tube station and paid for own tickets because the happy couple hadn’t thought things through. It was the most joyous wedding I have ever been to.
The next day, I attended a traditional formal white wedding, village church, sit down meal etc. The micro management to have everything just so was nerve wracking and the tension didn’t dissipate until well into the evening do. It was exhausting.
I think the reality wedding shows have a lot to answer for in setting unreasonable expectations. I also think that couples who say they can’t afford to get married, have their priorities wrong.
We got married in a registry office 35 years ago.. There were about 40 guests mostly from my side. A number of Mr M's side said they wouldn't come unless their was an evening do.We had a nice meal at a local pub which had a function room and no evening do. My hen do was a meal and a few drinks with half a dozen close friends. I don't recall MrM bothering with a stag do.
Younger daughter was a bridesmaid this year and to her digust the hen do mushroomed into several days in the Algarve, matching pyjamas and bikinis for instagram and lots of other nonsense.
She is getting married next year and has told her sister (who will be a bridesmaid) the hen do should be afternoon tea at a nice local hotel . The future mother in law has lost the plot and seems to want something on the scale of a royal wedding!! Daughter and fiance have booked exactly what they want with out consulting his mother. My sister is making the cake, daughter is looking at a preloved dress as she refuses to pay £1000's. 2nd cousins who noone has seen in years are not getting invited . I am making suppotive noises and letting them get on with it.
I deplore waste. I encourage sustainability so there's no way I can condone air miles, overeating, plastic bunting, balloons etc etc.
Go and sign on the dotted line. Two witnesses. Come back and have a nice meal and everyone can wish you luck.
I'm fairly sure they have demonstrated a (negative) correlation - in fact I think it might even have been a question on QI or something - I had a vague feeling there was a More or Less type article in the BBC website but I can't find it with a quick search.
Interestingly, I seem to recall there was also a correlation (positive this time) between the number of guests and the length of the marriage, so you need to have a cheap wedding but with lots of guests!
Shedman - perhaps your daughter should give Sharon a copy of the Modern Family episode where Lily (aged about 4) is a bridesmaid as a wedding gift
We are a small family amd there'll be 10 of us at my son's wedding. Sad, I know. The other 60 will be mainly their friends - fair enough - and the bride's step-this, step-that, step- the other and an array of cousins, and small kids, who HAVE to go.
Well, since they're footing most of the bill, they can have who they like.
But I would like a couple of our friends to come. Even if I have to ruddy well pay for them!
I'm quite surprised at the future DiL, whom I adore. The minute she got the engagement ring on her finger, she went into overdrive!
My mouth is firmly shut. I happened to make a couple of suggestions early on, and got given harsh words...
Last year one of Mrs B's 2nd cousins got married. They were already living together and were buying a house. They sold the house to pay for the wedding/honeymoon (which was a month in the USA and Mexico plus somewhere else) and moved back in with her mother! Madness. I should add that the stag and hen do's were also abroad, his somewhere in eastern Europe and hers in Greece IIRC. We went to the wedding. The invites asked for donations towards the cost!! Needless to say we took them a present.
Crumbs! That’s beyond bonkers. A complete act of financial self-harm. They’ll surely live to regret it.