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Discussion in 'Primary' started by Andrew Jeffrey, Apr 25, 2008.
Took me a moment, that! Brilliant.
Brilliant. My other year half once had a child write "Robin Hood had green ****"( tights)in a piece of describing work. We still laugh about it.
Slightly different, I had p_______r what could this word be on the board. One of my children had looked in a dictionary and written the word pawnbroker. I said they could have a point if they spelt it write and knew the meaning I asked if she knew what it meant, luckily on a one to one as she went on to say 'someone who is incharge of women who have sex?'. I'm afraid I didn't give her the point!
Had two funny ones this week (Y3). The children had to write a story about their dream job. One child was a doctor:
"I had to go to the rescue. The child had kidney failiure. He was in a comma."
Another child looked after horses but didn't quite get the spelling correct.
"I look after hores. I have white ones, brown ones and black ones.....I like to ride the hores every day....The hores were entering a competition."
"I give you a ring," said the prince.
"**** you," said the princess (instead of thank)
"I was walking down the ******* road" (wonky road)
A regular one in my class is c@nt for "couldn't"! Oh dear.
When asked for wow words to describe the Granny character .... "sexy" came up from the child who's parent was the class helper that day!
We also had the other week....
They hav in sex .....
(They have insects ...) was worried at first that the 5 year old was writing about somebody having sex.
I've had 'fuc you for being my techer' and c@nt is a regular for can't in my class.
on a similar note to Poppychick we were describing the Gruffalo and the children were thinking of words and one came up with 'horny'. I couldn't bring myself to write it down and my TA and I had to avoid each other for the rest of the lesson!
When recalling the our father in their holy communion books ... instead of writing 'thy kingdom come', they wrote 'Die king die kong'!!!
These are hilarious!!
Rewriting the Indian story "Footprints in the Forest", I had 'Kelu walked through the w*nkin village' (waking).
The question was, "What are you good at?"
The answer was, "I am good at ****ing" (counting)
I was doing the dinner register this morning and was surprised that so many were having school dinners - 12 instead of the normal 4 or 5. 'What is it that's so nice?' I asked. One pupil, looking rather vague, answered, 'It's meat, but I haven't had it before. It's pork lion.'
Walking past the board later I noticed 'Friday's Dinner - Pork Loin'. Aaaahhhh - now I see!!!!!
After a really "heavy" week on the forum this is the stuff we need! Brilliant really made me laugh, these are things we went into teaching for! thanks guys!
The children I teach have quite strong accents so "a trip to the beach" became "a trip to the *****" in a Yr1 story
One of my Y2 children apparently had a lovely trip to "Norf*ck" (as written in her recount).
I had a KS1 child writing about a f*ckey monkey this week in poetry- meant funky monkey and have also had a child in KS2 write a dictionary definition of a ******* I asked them to choose a word at random from dictionary, oops wasn't quite expecting that! oh and also had a 5 year old child call out **** and suck when doing rhyming words- oh joy!!!
'She was very angry and **** at him' (bit extreme, I thought. Lol - should have been 'shouted')