1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hi Guest, welcome to the TES Community!

    Connect with like-minded education professionals and have your say on the issues that matter to you.

    Don't forget to look at the how to guide.

    Dismiss Notice

truth about Father Christmas

Discussion in 'Personal' started by Tara Jane, Nov 30, 2011.

  1. Mr TJ has taken our 9 year old son to football training. Apparently on the way he has asked if Father Christmas is real or is it us!!!
    I knew this day would come but seriously did not want it to be now. Wanted one more magical child like Christmas - especially as my elderly parents are coming to stay.
    Any advice on way forward ie confirm or deny? when did you tell your children.
    OH thinks that at birth children should be told "there is no God, tooth fairy or Santa" - i feel a long night ahead
     
  2. Mr TJ has taken our 9 year old son to football training. Apparently on the way he has asked if Father Christmas is real or is it us!!!
    I knew this day would come but seriously did not want it to be now. Wanted one more magical child like Christmas - especially as my elderly parents are coming to stay.
    Any advice on way forward ie confirm or deny? when did you tell your children.
    OH thinks that at birth children should be told "there is no God, tooth fairy or Santa" - i feel a long night ahead
     
  3. Often, this can be a child's way of feeling their way forward- best tip I've heard is to redirect it back at the child, asking, "Well, what do you think?" Maybe he's heard from others that he doesn't exist or has just put it together himself. I don't think it matters what he truly thinks at this stage, so long as his enjoyment isn't ruined.
     
  4. Dunteachin

    Dunteachin Star commenter

    I told my son around that age, because everyone in his class had been saying FC doesn't exist. He was beginning to look silly, so I told him the truth. He sobbed and sobbed and inbetween sobs, he gasped " and I suppose you are going to tell me that the tooth fairy doesn't exist, either." To which I replied "Now you mention it..." More sobs. From me, too.
    It turns out he was crying, because he thought he wouldn't get any presents if he didn't believe in Santa. As it happens, he had the best Christmas ever.
    I can't tell you how traumatic it was for me. It didn't help when friends expressed horror that I had told him so near to Christmas. You might get away with it for another year. Good luck!!

     
  5. Ophelia 9

    Ophelia 9 New commenter

    My children believed in Father Christmas till a very late age by modern standards (they are adults now, but it wasn't that long ago!) They were so devastated when told the truth that I actually agree with your OH - wish I hadn't done it. Part of the reaction was probably because they had been ridiculed at school and put put up massive (and very well thought-out, actually) arguments against the majority of their peers so then felt extremely foolish in retrospect.
    I would let the myth go - but you could suggest that as Gran and Grandad still believe perhaps you could all still pretend!
     
  6. I told my children that he would come as long as they believed in him. If they stopped he would no longer visit and that is when Mum and Dad took over. The youngest cosmos believed until he was 10.
     
  7. Bethannie

    Bethannie New commenter

    I remember walking into the kitchen one morning and asking Mum outright : "it's you isn't it...there isn't any Father Christmas."
    My little Aspie brain had spotted the catalogues that Mum had every year (John England and then Marshall Ward) and looked at the toys and games section...and concluded that these sections existed for parents to buy toys 'by the week'...and why would they do that if Father Christmas was real?
    I happily accepted that it was Mum (and Dad,...but even then as a child I knew that Mum chose the present, Mum scrimped and saved to make the weekly payments) and that they showed her love for me.
    It also helped me come to terms with the strange anomalies at school....why did everyone think that Santa had a reindeer when I knew he had a donkey?!...and he came on Christmas Eve, not on Christmas Morning!......it's actually surprising I didn't realise earlier!
     
  8. dusty67

    dusty67 New commenter


    I pretty much worked out the same way when I was middle juniors. I told my mum that I knew Father Christmas wasn't real.. She told me that he was real and it was my dad, because he worked hard to pay for all the toys for us for Christmas.

     
  9. Norad tracks Santa is fab! My two big, hairy-ar$ed teenagers (and me!) track him all Christmas Eve to see when he will be arriving at our home town - it's great fun.
    I never did the Santa lie with my kids. They knew from being toddlers that mum and dad, and all the other people who loved them, bought them presents. They knew that Santa was not real but that some people like to believe he is and pretend that he comes with presents, etc, etc. It never spoiled their enjoyment of Christmas and they never spoiled anyone else's Christmas by saying Santa wasn't real. For me it was just too big a lie to tell them.
     
  10. Same in our house and I have the same conversation at school - even with the year 11s. Goes along the lines of 'if you don't believe in our house he doesn't come'.

    Likewise never had to have any conversations, nor had traumatised children.
     
  11. The last time I ever remember believing I
     
  12. I remember finding "Father Christmas'" wrapping paper behind an armchair when I was about 7, and I think that started me wondering about the reality. I think I figured it out when I was 9 - mainly because we moved house 4 days before Christmas, and spent Christmas at my grandparents and I was wondering how on earth he found me - but didn't tell my parents for another year!
    I still got a stocking until the Christmas I turned 18, even though I knew it was my Dad who brought it upstairs - by the time I was 15 I was going to bed at the same time as my parents so he just left it outside my door and the fake deep "ho ho ho it's Father Christmas" in my Dad gave it away!
     
  13. I'll try that again!
    The last time I ever remember believing I was 6, but I'm not sure I
    believed even then. My brother realised at an early age and asked why
    Father Christmas shopped at the early learning centre. Therefore I would
    guess that I knew at about 4.
    I agree with those who never told
    their children he was real - it doesn't really make a difference, its
    still magical to open the stocking on Christmas morning. If and when I
    have them I'll probably go along with the idea as all the children at
    nursery/school will do, but I would probably tell them myself if they
    didnt know by 9.
    I think taking the idea beyond leaving presents
    is odd - people who 'write back' as Santa or dress up and pretend to be
    him. How do you explain this when they find out? Wouldn't any child
    think that was a little overkill?! I was always told that nobody saw him
    (for obvious reasons...) so the idea that he would sit in the doorway
    of a shopping centre just seemed odd. Even when I did believe I think I
    'knew' that that was one of his helpers and not really him!
    I got a stocking until I was 21...probably still would be if my brother hadn't suggested that we were told old *grumbles*
     

Share This Page