Advice needed please. I began my degree in primary education in 2015 after completing my Level 3 CACHE supporting teaching & learning TA qualification and working as a INA for a year. I mentioned my interest in training to teach and my colleagues encouraged me to pursue this. I have suffered from anxiety and depression for a few years now and I did enjoy my first year placement which was in a preschool but I don't think I got a real idea of or understood the stress and workload this career brings. I returned to my second year but I soon intermitted a year due to my anxiety taking control of my life, this was a positive move and the right thing for myself to do. Unfortunately soon before I was to return to university (2017) in my second year, my dad got suddenly very sick and I was missing a lot of seminars and I just felt so lost and out of depth and was encouraged to take another year out however I was embarrassed and decided to withdraw from university all together. After a year of working full-time in a dead end bar job where I wasn't appreciated and poorly paid and having looked for other possible career paths, I decided to believe in myself more and my anxiety was under control and I felt ready to give it another go and return for year 2. (2018) My 2nd attempt of second year - I was 24 and thought being a bit older may be good for me and it started off well, but I did feel out of depth after being out of uni for 2 years. I haven't been feeling particularly motivated during seminars at uni etc but I did hope this would change when I was able to get myself involved in the classroom when on placement. I was nervous for placement but mostly excited, I have nearly completed my first week and I have never cried so much in such a short space of time. I feel the older I have got, the less confidence I have. I seem to have this constant feeling of dread and anxiety and I over think everything to the point of talking myself out of volunteering to read the story. I have to fight back the tears all day long, I don't even understand why I am so upset and scared. My mentor at the school is lovely but after only a week of seeing how much stress she is under and how excited and inspired these teachers are when hearing them in PPA just makes me feel like I haven't got the motivation or the passion to teach. I used to be so enthusiastic in the classroom but I feel I undermined having 2 years out of the classroom and how my confidence has just gone, I am stumbling over my words, I get so nervous and I haven't even been observed yet. I find myself wondering aimlessly around the classroom and I just feel feel numb, I feel so low I'm finding it so hard to keep a smile on my face. My family have reminded me my health and well being is more important than finishing a degree in something that causes me so much stress and anxiety and have told me to not even consider the money I would have wasted because although I know a degree would hold me in good stead, I just can't put myself through another 8 weeks of placement this year and 4 months of it in 3rd year, never mind my NQT year. I feel so ashamed and embarrassed because my course leaders gave me a second chance to finish my degree and asked me am I honestly sure I wanted to return and I said yes. However a week into my placement and I have not felt this low in many years and I have throwing up and barely eaten since I started the placement due to my anxiety of being in the classroom and feel like I'm being very cruel to myself to force myself to finish and make myself ill if I have no desire to teach. I don't know where to even begin with letting my uni know I want to leave during my placement, but I just know I can't carry on feeling like this everyday, its making my family worry about me as well which rings alarm bells as I have been very depressed in the past. I don't want to have to face the uni to discuss my decision because I'm so anxiety ridden right now and nearly had a panic attack when I decided I needed to leave my placement this afternoon. I suppose Im just looking for some advice and to try and get the idea of 'being a failure' and 'always being a quitter' out of my mind because it is eating me alive. Sorry for the long post. thank you in advance.