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Tom - Completely innapropriate year 8 girl

Discussion in 'Behaviour' started by LittleStreams, Mar 14, 2011.

  1. LittleStreams

    LittleStreams New commenter

    Just did a trip, and a girl was completely innapropriate. She asked me some very personal questions, that I managed to get out of, but then she kept insisting that me and this other teaching assistant should get together, and when we both reminded her that we both are in relationships, she pressed even further, saying we should have a threesome. She honestly thought it a joke, and was confused when we got angry with her.
    I am unsure what to do next. We reported it to the HoY, but how do I react next time I see her and she starts again. The first thing she said to me today was 'how is your love-life going'. Laughing it off isn't working, because she just gets too familiar, and she really doesn't realise she is doing anything wrong.
  2. '...she really doesn't realise she is doing anything wrong....'
    Oh yes she does. But she knows she can probably get away with it. Keep the HoY and other SMT on the case... if you can.
  3. I wouldn't even try to laugh it off. Can't you just tell her right out that she is being inappropriate and it isnt acceptable?
  4. minnieminx

    minnieminx New commenter

    A very stern look and a 'that is completely out of order, would you like me to ask your mother what she thinks?' should soon let her know you are not standing for it. If she continues treat her like you would any other child being rude. Use the school sanctions. Do not give her information such as being in relationships, it is none of her business.
  5. Tom_Bennett

    Tom_Bennett Occasional commenter

    You can fix this. If you're absolutely sure that she's not deliberately being rude, and that she simply doesn't see where the boundaries lie, then you can nail this easily: take her aside in some non-confrontational, neutral way- in the playgorund, a corridor, away from her mates, and tell her:
    <ol>[*]You know she didn't mean any harm, but...[*]...you don't like personal comments being made.[*]After all, she wouldn't like personal comments being made, would she?[*]You'd appreciate it if she stopped from now on, because you know she wouldn't want you to be offended...</ol>That should be all it takes. Because after that point of non-confrontational clarity, there's no ambiguity about what she should and shouldn't say. If she keeps it up after that, then I would discipline her in the same way I would any other matter- phone calls home, meetings with parents, detentions, the whole nine yards.
    After all, it could very well be the case that she knew it would wind you up (comments like that aren't uncommon), and that she was lapping up your obvious discomfort. In which case, avoid 1-4, and proceed to more direct action.
    Students have no right to make personal comments about teachers- nor the reverse, in fact, unless it relates to educational matters. What's sauce for the goose...unless you're David Starkey :)
    Good luck

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