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Things You Would Never Hear A Supply Teacher Say

Discussion in 'Supply teaching' started by Gold1996, Nov 17, 2010.

  1. "Yes, I'm the one that's been lurking around outside the staff room door waiting to sneak in with someone with a fob, but it's OK, I have my own coffee, mug, milk, sugar and hot water, thanks."
  2. "Oh they're a challenging/lively class and I just need to be firm with them - my favourite type of children."
    pepper5 likes this.
  3. magic surf bus

    magic surf bus Star commenter

    "Fear not - the complete absence of SEN information for this bottom set is not a problem for me. My psychic superpowers will instantly pinpoint the child with anger management issues and a very short fuse."
    pepper5 likes this.
  4. historygrump

    historygrump Lead commenter Forum guide

    No I am not worried about have a a bottom set SEN dominated class in the isolated portacabin on the other side of the fields.
    pepper5 likes this.
  5. "I'm sorry Mrs. Hobson thought I was looking at her funny. I've seen my optician and he says my lazy eye seems to focus on ugly women, so he's given me an eye patch."
  6. More than "proper"...fully registered, very well qualified, highly experienced and just RARING TO GO! Will you zoom with me?
    Absolutely no apologies...

  7. lapinrose

    lapinrose Star commenter

    Sorry, can't work today I'm having my nails done.
  8. Moony

    Moony Lead commenter

    "Yes you have called me on a day when i told you in advance that i can't work, i'll just re-arrange my doctors app/dentist app/car service/loved ones funeral and i'll be in work in a jiffy"
    pepper5 likes this.
  9. You can joke - I've actually had an agency ask me to do that to cover an afternoon they were stuck for! (was a docs appointment thankfully - not a funeral) I was expecting to get phoned on my wedding with last minute calls to be honest!
  10. ''that's right I'm being Anne for the day,indeed it is probably best if you refer to me as 'your being Anne aren't you?' and introduce me as such,it will save a lot of confusion and I'm not really worthy of my own identity as I only came into being at the moment your secretary phoned my agency''
  11. No I didn't know Queen Victoria personally, but I can still tell you a lot about her....
  12. magic surf bus

    magic surf bus Star commenter

    "No I'm sorry, I'm not available for work today as I have an appointment with my stockbroker to discuss my burgeoning investment portfolio."
    pepper5 likes this.
  13. err.... no we don't!!
  14. Moony

    Moony Lead commenter

    I've had that twice actually, once was when i was meant to be packing for a weekend away and the other time i was on interview
    pepper5 likes this.
  15. Actually come to think of it I had a call the day before I got married asking if I was available for work - I was like, "nooo I'm 300 miles away and about to get hitched tomorrow - you know this"... luckily it was one of the guys I have a good rapport with so told them "you've forgotten haven't you ya plonker."
  16. Why don't I use this quiet time to take that long holiday I've always wanted? I think there is a reason, if I could only just think of it.
  17. VelvetChalk

    VelvetChalk New commenter

    'Hello children, Im not your real teacher so you can say what you want to me because i wont be back'
    pepper5 likes this.
  18. "Theres nothing I like more than getting up at 7:15am on a potential day off"
    "I just love it when my agency says theyll get back to me in the next few days regarding a job I was desperate for, then after a week of being ignored, its so nice of them to respond to my concern with 'oh yeah, that position was filled last week'......I love my agency"
    "Dear class teacher. It's absolutely fine by me that you don't leave me any notes, I really enjoy planning a lesson for a group of children Ive never seen before in a matter of minutes whilst also being in strange environment. Please do it more often as I like to be stressed on a daily basis. Many thanks"
    "It makes me feel wonderful when I am referred to as 'the supply'....in fact, I am considering changing my name by deed poll because I like it so much"
    "I think it's unfair that I get paid more on a daily basis than you with your 'real' job"
    "I am not at all concerned that it's only 4 weeks untill Christmas and I haven't had work since the beginning of November...I love being skint"
  19. Yes it's appalling that I don't join in with the school prayer having received it through telepathy. And of course every school prayer is identical. Silly me.
  20. "You're right, silly me. Of course you can create the video store database with only three tables."

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