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tactless colleague after returning from long term absence

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by annehathaway100, Mar 2, 2012.

  1. Advice please: I have been off work for six months with severe depression and a endocrine disorder.
    On my return most colleagues have been friendly and accomodating. One colleague, however, has expressed to me how peeved she is that she will have to give up the classes she has been covering for me and "someone else will get all the glory'. This colleague is part time and agreed to change her timetable and up her hours on the understanding that when I returned she would fall back to her normal teaching timetable. She is, of course, being paid for her time. I have found her whispering in corners and looking tearful a number of times.
    I guess the problem is that her behaviour has made me feel really uncomfortable and upset - I haven't been on a world cruise! I feel I am having to apologise for my horrible illness. if she can say this to my face god knows what else she has been saying behind my back. I am close to my line manager and he has asked me to report how all is going during my phased return - should I mention her unhappiness and what i have encountered or put up and shut up? Many thanks.
  2. Ruthie66

    Ruthie66 New commenter

    I think it is difficult one but if you can it is probably worth trying to ignore it if possible - it's probably just an immediate response which will fade
    If she really is making you feel upset then it might be worth saying something to your line manager like "I think Mrs X is finding my being back a bit difficult" and then see where the conversation goes.
  3. chocolateworshipper

    chocolateworshipper Occasional commenter

    I think if it were me, I would say something to my line manager along the lines of "I would like to make sure that X gets some of the credit for the progress in my classes as she has been covering them - she mentioned that she is concerned about it." This lets him know what is going on, but you sound like you are telling him for her benefit - rather than complaining about her. I do completely understand why you are upset though - if you were off sick for six months, it was not a minor illness! If you feel up to it, you could thank her for taking your classes - it MAY make her more friendly towards you - and if it doesn't, you've done all you can do and it's then HER problem if she still chooses to be unfriendly. I guess it is possible that she has become used to the extra money, and she has financial concerns. This doesn't excuse her attitude towards you - but sometimes knowing WHY someone is unkind to us can make it a little easier. Good luck with your phased return, and I hope you make a full, speedy recovery x
  4. thanks Ruthie, I'll see how it goes next week.
  5. thanks chocolate worshipper , great advice. All you want when you are a bit wobbly is kindness x
  6. Dunteachin

    Dunteachin Star commenter

    The silly woman. What's the matter with her? She knew the circumstances and that on your return she would revert to her original hours.

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