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Student with a hickey..

Discussion in 'Secondary' started by TSingh95, Mar 19, 2011.

  1. Just wondering, what do you think when you see a student with a hickey?

    Does your opinion vary depending on what type of student it is? Whether it is a boy or girl? Whether they are smart or not?

    Thanks
     
  2. blazer

    blazer Star commenter

    My onlt worry would be if they were very young. yr9 and above I wouldn't worry.
     
  3. blazer

    blazer Star commenter

    IO am assuming you mean a love bite when you say hickey?
     
  4. Saw a Y9 lad the other day with a quite bad one on his neck!
     
  5. One comment from a Product Design teacher about 5 years ago (Yes I am only 20 ;) ) made sure I never went to school with one again.
    He pulled out a 20p, then came up to me in class and announced to the class he was giving me this 20p to buy a Curly-Whirly for my girlfriend to chomp on rather than my neck.
    Yes, I laughed as well but it is safe to say, it was the last time I went to school with one.
     
  6. I do indeed
     
  7. Haha! Nice one, i'd say it's pretty embarrassing though and as for the others I was genuinely just wondering what you guys thought of it!

    Curiousity killed the cat!
     
  8. unless it is potentially a child protection issue (i.e. the younger end of the school, perhaps with some peer pressure), why would you not just ignore it? Why sink to their level?
     
  9. Bizarrely enough I had this recently with a student I teach for CCT. She came in late and wasn't her normal chirpy self. I took her outside and asked her what was wrong.

    At this point she tentatively pulled back her hair to show a love-bite. Now I've seen (and been the victim of) some pretty horrific bites in my time (what can I ay, I had horrific taste in boys, which was rectified at a later date), and this was tame. She was visibly distressed because it was a mark of 'those type of girls' of which she wasn't one and she was scared and upset and had told her bf not to do it.

    As we carried on talking I realised the bf was in my form class. Really lovely kid, so I said I talk to him. She was horrified 'please don't say anything!'. I said I'd tell him I'd heard girls calling her names and had asked her what was going on. When she wouldn't say anything the girls in the class picking on her, had.

    This situation hadn't happened in my class, but it had happened 30mins previous. She was OK with this. I told her that sometimes young adults experiment but if she didn't want to do something she had to be quite firm in her refusal, but that I understand how she had felt, and that a 'quiet no' was all she could muster. That she wasn't 'that type of girl' and that it was OK.

    I spoke to her bf later, who hadn't heard her say no, was genuinely upset she was being picked on because of it, and that he'd try to listen to her more. I explained to them both that they needed to talk to each other, that it was OK to say no, and that neither of them should force the other. Any step forward they considered taking, should be discussed first. Together. Open and honestly.Talking and holding hands was fine, and that they shouldn't feel pressurised into anything they felt uncomfortable with.

    Both students were Year 7...
     
  10. This happened to me with a year 8 last year whilst working as a TA (I'm now a PGCE student). I was discussing it with the class teacher as I wasnt sure what to do as I felt it shouldnt go unnoticed, and it just so happened the school's attached police officer overheard us. She quite firmly informed us that this had to be reported to the CP officer immediately - just in case, basically. I'm not an authority on this, but both this incident and all my training indicates that the best advice is to tell the CP officer. It might be innocent, but it might well not be. And in this case, it was so blatant that the girl clearly had some boundary issues she needed to sort out....I dont know what the outcome of this case was, but even if it was just an over-zealous boyfriend, she needed to be told that this isnt really appropriate in a classroom and therefore best kept unseen at the very least!
     
  11. I think it is awful. I am teaching in East Kent and have seen at least one student a week with very bad love bites up and down their necks since January! As young as 11 yrs old and then they talk about who is having both oral and more serious sexual encounters. I worry and report but told nothing can be done. Where is our duty of care with this? I think that shows there is a growing problem with young children being involved in Adult activities.
     
  12. I would always recommend pasasing the info on to DSP or CP member of staff. As teachers we don't always have the complete picture so it is better to be safe than sorry. This particularly applies to lower school pupils.
     
  13. As young as 11! Oh heck!
     
  14. I generally suggest they take the offender for a decent meal or put a stake through their heart .... but that s just me [​IMG]
     
  15. Think back to your own childhood / adolescence .....how many boys claimed to have "done it" and how many actually had ? I wuld put money on it 90% of it is bravado ....
     
  16. I've advised students not to let their bf/gf 'brand' them in this way, that it's disrespectful to them and that they're worthy of more respect, from both the b/gf and for themselves. Yes, many of us have been there ourselves, and I certainly wish someone had said something similar to me.
     
  17. If somebody showed me off a hickey--in 11 years of teaching, nobody ever has--I would peobably say, "None of my business. Not appropriate to share such stuff with your teacher!"
     
  18. I agree, I think it makes them look rough/ruff.
    However, I don't think it is as bad as boys who have one ear pieced.
     
  19. Not interested. Frankly it's irrelevant to me what they spend their time doing outside school. As long as it's not dangerous or illegal, they can do what they like. I'm not in the business of making personal judgements about students. My own son, on the other hand...
     

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