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Student giving me gifts, unsure of appropriate reaction

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by CandleStickInTheDrawingRoom, Mar 4, 2012.

  1. Hi all, this may sound very trivial and not much of a dilemma. However I wanted some thoughts on how to deal with a student who keeps giving me gifts.
    I first mentioned that partner wants to try coloured contacts - two days later she handed me a set of blue contacts for him to try. I regularly wear 'blingy' bracelets, after commenting that I had lost one, she brought me one in... still in a gift bag and un-opened packet.
    The latest gift is a boxed, beautiful earrings and necklace set.
    Each time I have protested that I cannot accept the gifts - when I say this she gets very upset.
    The student is 15 and not from an affluent background.
    Should I phone home and check the gifts are indeed hers to give, offer money, or give them back regardless of how upset she gets?
    Suggestions please
     
  2. chocolateworshipper

    chocolateworshipper Occasional commenter

    I think if it were me, my first step would be to inform the HT - so that there is no accusation of soliciting gifts further down the line. I suspect that phoning home would be the right next step - saying that you really appreciate the gifts, but you don't want this girl to feel that she needs to do it. Interested to see what others think.
     
  3. It's a strange one isn't it? I get lots of gifts at Christmas and end of year so didn't really think much of it until third gift; when it dawned on me that wasn't a special occasion and a definite pattern was developing.

    Thanks for the advice, I shall take the gifts back into school and keep in desk drawer. Will inform my Line Manager tomorrow.
     
  4. minnieminx

    minnieminx New commenter

    I would speak to the child's HOY rather than the HT. There may be a history of this.
     
  5. Middlemarch

    Middlemarch Star commenter

    That's what I would advise. It's what I did when a Y11 boy that I taught kept asking me out when I was 24!
     
  6. minnieminx

    minnieminx New commenter

    Please reassure us that this chappie isn't now your husband! ;)
     
  7. Oh, how I giggled when I read this!!!!
     
  8. Middlemarch

    Middlemarch Star commenter

    Ooer, no! I don't want anyone to get the impression that I'd look once at a pupil. I wasn't even flattered, as he was well strange.
    I was never the type to get fancied by the boys I've taught, I should add. Just him.
     

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