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Struggling to get pregnant, any ideas?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy' started by kierawww, Apr 10, 2019.

  1. kierawww

    kierawww New commenter

    Hi! :)

    Me and my husband have been trying to get pregnant for the last 6-8 months ish, and we've had nothing - absolutely nothing. It's a little bit heart crushing doing a pregnancy test for months on end and not getting anything. I'm not aware of any fertility issues or anything that could impact it so I'm really not sure what's going on. I used this ovulation calculator last 2 months and wondered if anyone here used something similar and had any success? I'm really not sure where to go from here so really any advice would be helpful

  2. skellig1182

    skellig1182 Senior commenter


    I used the sticks from amazon and boots do good ones too. The postive line should be as dark as or darker than the control line. Often we think it’s positive and it’s not quite there. I would do two a day throughout the month and stick them on a chart. That way you would see the sticks lined up, getting darker and darker. After a year it’s good to see the GP. It can take a year to get pregnant.

    Join the babycentre.co.uk website. There is a group for couples trying to get pregnant and you will get so much support on there.xxx
  3. SammyBear2016

    SammyBear2016 Occasional commenter


    There's a few things that you could try/consider:

    1. Clear blue have an ovulation indicator that you use every morning and will tell you when you are ovulating. The first month we tried this it worked.

    2. Are you using lubricant because some research suggests that it can affect the motility of sperm and in some cases fight the sperm but there are some specifically designed for when you are trying to conceive

    3. Some research suggests that not having sex every day is better for sperm

    4. If you have been trying for 6 - 8 months i would imagine that you are feeling quite stressed about it all. You could have a couple of months where you don't actively try to get pregnant. Take the pressure off you both because if you are getting stressed it can have an impact.

    It is not uncommon for it to take up to 12 months to get pregnant. It is very easy to say when you are not in that position but try not to get too stressed about it yet.

    After you have been trying for 12 months if you are still unsuccessful (but hopefully this won't be the case) visit your GP who would then run some tests on yourself and your husband.

    I wish you all the best and hope you get a positive test very soon.
  4. Mazod

    Mazod Occasional commenter

    I've just ovulation tests as described above with both my pregnancies and found them excellent. I have a friend who took a year to conceive the first time around for no reason, just because that's the way it is sometimes. She conceived her second baby as soon as she started trying! Keep going
  5. katnoodle

    katnoodle New commenter

    In was in the same boat but am now 7 weeks pregnant and I have a lot of thoughts as to why it finally happened for us! First off a bit of story attached... We tried for 18 months unsuccessfully, then stopped because I changed jobs. It took us 4 cycles when we started trying again over a year later. I think one or more of the reasons below could've been why.
    1. I was a lot less stressed about it. This is MUCH easier said than done. But I realise the first time I was stuck in a massive work rut and hoped pregnancy would help resolve it, adding to the pressure I'm now much happier at work, and having a new pet and new hobbies were a big distraction. My expectations of how long it would take were also much lower because of the first time, but we'd also had some initial fertility testing and knew there was nothing major wrong.
    2. Kind of connected, another reason I used to get so stressed was because my periods was so painful. Not sure how it works but I got a magnet device to wear in underwear that dramatically reduced the pain, so again less focused on that dreaded Day 1 of AF.
    3. First time around I'd just had the contraceptive implant removed. I was regular with periods the whole time we were trying and hormone tests came back normal, but second time I'd just come off the pill instead.
    Reason 1 is probably the most likely but it's hard to achieve. Distracting yourself is important Personally I found ovulation tests just added to the stress - I used an app instead to work out when my fertile window is (roughly a week) and tried to do it as much as possible in that week. Ovulation sticks can help establish that window properly and then the app can recalibrate if you have a less regular cycle (eg some are 28 days but ovulate late-ish with a short luteal phase). After that I just got on with life: I was very pleasantly surprised how quickly it happened this time.

    Good luck!
  6. dunnocks

    dunnocks Star commenter

    stress has no bearing what so ever on whether you get pregnant, that's a myth, don't worry about that.

    How old are you? If you are older than 32 I would see a doctor sooner rather than later
  7. kierawww

    kierawww New commenter

    Thank you all for the replies! I've had a lot going on in the last few months so not much opportunity to get back on

    Thank you! I'll give them a shot :)

    I really appreciate the advice, definitely eased my mind a bit! We'll keep the 12 months thing in mind too.

    Best of luck for your pregnancy and new family member! <3 Thank you for the little story there, definitely lifted some weight off my chest.

    Thank you all for the replies and well wishes! I think we'll take it easy for the next few months, see what happens and generally take it slow. Thank you all again! xxx
  8. spinning_wheel

    spinning_wheel New commenter

    Try using a basal body thermometer (BBT) to find out exactly when you ovulate. I found that really helpful when trying to conceive. Have the thermometer by your bed and take your temp first thing in the morning before you get up and move. Record the temp on a BBT chart, when you get a temp spike it means ovulation took place the day before. Try that for a few cycles to get to know when you ovulate.
  9. BrandonO82

    BrandonO82 New commenter

  10. Doitforfree

    Doitforfree Star commenter

    In fact all the research shows that having as much sex as possible as often as you like is the best way! Six to eight months isn't that long.
  11. azhal-halil

    azhal-halil New commenter

    I hope your husband isn’t trying to get pregnant, I think I know the fault behind that.
  12. TroubledTeacher1

    TroubledTeacher1 New commenter

    Use conceive plus. Worked for me first cycle lol
  13. TroubledTeacher1

    TroubledTeacher1 New commenter

    It is a lubricant that has great reviews
  14. ThinLizz

    ThinLizz New commenter

    Hello. How are you doing so far? :)

    That's good advice but you haven't stated which sticks should she use exactly. Easytobemom suggests using Clearblue, Docalon or Wondfo tests as the most accurate ones and I agree with this opinion. Been using those when me and my husband were TTC as well as some ovulation kits.
  15. skellig1182

    skellig1182 Senior commenter

    Hey, they are called one step ovulation tests and you can get a pack of 50 very cheaply I got pregnant the first month of trying with these. xxx

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