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Stopping feeding to sleep...alternatives please!

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by blademaid, Apr 26, 2011.

  1. How about Elizabeth Pantley's 'The No Cry Sleep Solution'?
    Also, babies are amazingly adaptable and your mum will find her own way to get your DD to sleep.
    There is also Dr Jack Newman's night weaning method which worked wonderfully for us at 17 months but I don't think he recommends it under a year.
     
  2. Hi wormburger, I did stop feeding my LO off to sleep successfully, but he was 4 months old so I'm guessing it'll be harder with a 7 month old but here are my ideas... I'm thinking that you do it in stages so it's not so much of a shock for your LO. So, how about trying to change the habit in the day first? I always tried to make sure that feeds were followed by some awake time and then the nap came after that. How would your LO react if you unlatched before she falls asleep? Can you tell when it's changed from being a feed to a comfort suck? This would be the time to do it. Maybe try to gently encourage her to stay awake after a feed using the art of 'distraction' (!) Toys...a snack...a walk etc.... How many naps does she have a day? Is there any sort of pattern to them? At 7 months my LO was having 2 or 3 naps a day. If there is it might be easier but if not then you might need to try to structure them a bit e.g one in the morning and one in the afternoon. How about using some sort of comforter when you put her down in her bed? A small toy or blanket. I suppose what you're saying is she needs to learn to self-soothe. I think it's safe to say that if you really want her to get herself off to sleep, she's not going to like it! You may need to accept that there will be an element of grumbling and I doubt there's a magic solution I'm afraid. If you try to crack the daytime naps then I reckon the nighttime thing will fall into place. She's probably not hungry at night, like you say, but she is likely coming into a light sleep and not knowing how to get herself back off. Sorry I've no great answer for you, but hope this helps a bit. Good luck!
     
  3. Could you try getting your OH to settle her when she wakes at night as she associates you with breastfeeding? I know this is not always practical - my OH would never wake up when LO cried in the night.

    Although my LO was good at settling himself to sleep in the evening, I would always breastfeed him when he woke up as it was the easiest way to get him back down. At 11 months I decided to stop breastfeeding and started by refusing to feed at night. At first he seemed a bit confused but didn't fuss for very long and within a couple of days he was sleeping through the night. It doesn't necessarily have to mean lots of crying.

    I would agree with blademaid that your mum will be fine getting LO to sleep. When you're not there, she'll understand that she can't always be breastfed to sleep. Try not to panic about this. My LO was a nightmare getting to have naps when he started with a childminder at 6 months but he always napped perfectly for her.
     
  4. I used to feed my little girl to sleep but would sing a lullaby (the one from Mary Poppins) with the first verse while she was still latched on and the second with her in her cot, usually more or less asleep. Over time, she has associated the song with falling asleep (although I would say it took something like a month rather than the few days some people suggest) and now this is how she settles for naps. However, when OH puts her down to nap, he has his own routine, so I agree with the others that your Mum will probably not have the same trouble.
     
  5. I had the same problem, and still frequently feed my daughter to sleep.
    The first time I left her in the evening, with my husband, I was convinced she would be off the wall. I left her wide awake, and my husband had rocked her to sleep all by himself. (I should really have given him more credit). He is better at getting her to sleep than me, I just resort to nipples! If she smells your milk, she will want it!
    So, your mother will find a way in the end.,
     
  6. Thanks all.
    I'm still feeding her to sleep in the evening as it's inevitable with Bfeeding i think but we made a decision to stop feeding her when she woke in the night so the first night my OH went in and soothed her, picking her up, and it took 40 mins of hysterics before she went back to sleep in his arms. The second night I went in after 5 mins patted her etc and went back to bed and after another 15 mins she was fast asleep. And since then she has slept through!!!!
    I am amazed, I thought that letting her cry it out would take ages and be awful but it wasn't too bad, she didn't cry for too long and it only took 2 nights. We're approaching out 5th night of sleep so fingers crossed it will continue. She still occasionally wakes at the old times but gets herself back to sleep with only a few mins of tired crying. The most amazing thing was the revelation that she settled quicker when left on her own than she did when being held, I think it was giving her false hope.
    On the subject of my mum sorting it out, everyone was right. She came over today and whilst I was upstairs getting ready for us to go out with the pram "because otherwise she won't sleep", my Mum managed to rock her to sleep in her arms! Just goes to show me that I really shouldn't assume things won't work until I've tried them!
     
  7. Great news wormburger! A full night's sleep - bliss :) I forgot to say on my other post that it also took 2 nights for my LO to settle himself to sleep (how uncanny!) without a breastfeed. In fact, like your LO, it took 40mins on the first night, (with us going in from time to time patting and shushing) and about ten minutes on the second night! How weird.
    I bet you'd find the same thing would happen if you stopped that feed-to-sleep feed too. Sounds like your LO is very adaptable. Like you say
    I reckon you're right x
     

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