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So worried......

Discussion in 'Pregnancy' started by lovesmyfamily, Aug 30, 2011.

  1. Hi all!
    I have just finished my PGCE and started my new job in July :) however I have just found out I am pregnant and I am now so so worried about telling my new employer as I don't want them to think I did this on purpose - my fiance is thrilled and considering we are getting married next summer this was not the perfect timing but nevertheless we are happy with our news.
    I was just wondering when would be the best time to tell my employer and who do I tell first (as I am an NQT as well) I am so worried about everything - any advice would be great :)
     
  2. I believe you are supposed to tell them as soon as you know, but I'd say by the 3 month point, earlier if possible. Could even be a H&S thing dependant on the school/kids.Tell your NQT coordinator or whatever they're called these days first - they'll hopefully be a lovely person who's totally thrilled for you. Then make an appointment to see the principal.
     
  3. I believe you are supposed to tell them as soon as you know, but I'd
    say by the 3 month point, earlier if possible. Could even be a H&S
    thing dependant on the school/kids.Tell your NQT coordinator or whatever
    they're called these days first - they'll hopefully be a lovely person
    who's totally thrilled for you. Then make an appointment to see the
    principal.
     
  4. lilachardy

    lilachardy Star commenter

    You don't have to tell them until the 25th week.
    You'd be wise to tell them sooner though so your risk assessment can be made.
     
  5. You absolutely don't have to tell them as soon as you know. It is your right to wait until around 25 weeks (see paragraph below copied from another website)
    ""You do not have to let your employer know you are pregnant until the 15th week prior to the week your baby is due. This is called the notification week. Work this out by going to the Sunday before your due date (or staying with that date if your baby is due on a Sunday) and counting back another 15 weeks. However, if you need to take time off for antenatal appointments, you may need to announce your pregnancy before then"
    I wouldn't have got away with it personally - was so sick I was off a lot (and needed rearranged timetabling and off break duties etc). Also was huge by 25 weeks - people kept asking when I was due!
    It is your right to wait, but can be best to tell earlier than you have to due to appointments, risk assessments, support etc. If you possibly can wait until after 1st scan - it would be awful to tell them then have to go back and say something has happened. They would also then be looking at you wondering when you were going to get pregnant again.
     
  6. This depends on how you feel personally and your school. I did tell my head at around 7 weeks as I had a miscarriage previously (the school did know about it and were really good and supportive) so I wanted the support if something happened again and I needed time off without having to make awkward explanations. I was also very tired and felt very nauseous in the first trimester and again my head and line manager knowing meant that I could miss meetings/go home early without having to make up excuses.
    Enjoy being pregnant and don't worry about telling school. You won't be the first person who has got pregnant before starting your job and you won't be the last!
     
  7. I didn't tells school until I was about 17 weeks, mainly because home circumstances were difficult and I didn't want all the questions. I also teach science so risk assessments etc were an issue (I told the supervising technician but I figured I was far more knowledgeable about the risks from chemicals etc than the school business manager who was in charge of all that). If you can I'd wait until your 12 week scan, that seems the usual way.
     
  8. Thanks guys - feeling a lot more positive now and if I am not too sickly I will wait until after my scan to tell them :)
    Do you think I should my head first? Or my NQT coordinator?
     
  9. Headteacher, otherwise they take offence that someone else knows before them. My Heaadteacher wasn't happy that someone else knew before him and tried to tell her that she should have informed him because she knew.
     
  10. Hi
    I also fell pregnant in my NQT year and was terrified about how my school would take it. I needn't have worried- they were absolutely thrilled for me and I have been incredibly well supported. The first person I told was my partner teacher/team leader because we get on incredibly well and I wanted to keep her up to speed with why I had been off for a few days feeling rubbish. I then told my HT, who said he had guessed anyway! lol. I told him just before my 12 week scan so he knew why I was having time off, and also asked him to keep it to himself until my 12 week scan so I could tell everyone once I knew that things were ok. Please don't worry about how school will react. The most important thing is that you look after yourself. Being an NQT is hard and being pregnant as well makes it even harder, but you will get through it. Just remember that you and the baby are more important than school, so if you are unwell make sure you rest and take it easy. If books don't get marked that night, the world is not going to explode and if you don't deliver the best lessons all the time it honestly doesn't matter. Good luck with everything!
     
  11. Thank you so much Englishrose2010!
    I will try and pluck up the courage to tell my HoD within a couple of weeks so if I am ill (which I have started getting morning sickness - boo!) then at least he can understand why.
    I do feel a lot more confident about being able to go back to school next week now and just try my best but not to over do it :)
     
  12. hhhh

    hhhh Lead commenter

    The law says you do not need to tell them yet but until you do, they don't have to do a risk assessment for you. And assuming you are working in the average modern school, it is dangerous (see other forums, squaddies say Year 9s more dangerous than their job!), and also, say you get mornin sickness, you need a room near a toilet and arrangments to be made. So it's in your best intersts to say. Also you will need time off for appointments.
    They HAVE to be nice to you about it, nd let's face it most teachers are fairly decent human beings so will be much nicer tha n you think!
     

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