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separation question

Discussion in 'Personal' started by ms_sunshine, Apr 19, 2008.

  1. I'm not sure anyone checks tbh- so it can be whenever you decide.

    Friends of mine recently got divorced on the '2 year separation' as neither wanted to cite the other and they had actually only been living separately for a little over 12 months.
  2. You can just make up a date as no one could check when you actually decided to separate. That's what I have done, I just thought of a date and have used the same one on all paperwork
  3. Thanks for that - I can't see who would check either, and I really want to get it over with in 18 months time, not 2 years!!
  4. Absolutely, just make it up. I am divorcing my husband on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour so the situations are different but I just wrote down a random date and have stuck to it. Who can know when a person decided their marriage was over after all?
  5. I find it totally weird that in the UK there are still these "guilty party" and "unreasonable behaviour" things.

    Europe is much different!
  6. catmother

    catmother Star commenter

    Mind you,CQ,when the first MrCatmother and I got divorced in Scotland, we didn't have to have a guilty party or anything like that.Just a form and two signatures and back to being friends.
  7. yup, that is what happens here. There is no guilty party. I find so much of my homeland so strange and foreign.
  8. ambi

    ambi New commenter

    I was wondering the same thing - my husband and I separated in November but as I procrastinate such a lot have done nothing about it - it was at my instigation so he does not want me to do anything as he doesnt want to split. Have decided the time has come to do concrete things such as inform council people for council tax - surely they will need something official to confirm the separation or else anyone could say they are separated? Also for student finance - my daughter has to apply for next year and she missed out on quite a few things this year because we were jointly earning above a certain amount but this year it will be just my salary to consider but how do I get anything official to state I am separated and the date? I have looked into divorce but have to wait 2 or even 5 years before this can happen.Anyone out there with any answers??thanks!
  9. kittylion

    kittylion Senior commenter

    It's really only that you can get it done more quickly if you use the "unreasonable behaviour" and "adultery" reasons rather than the fact that you want to blame someone.

    TBH it never occurred to me to make up a date - I was a bit in shock so I just told the solicitor the truth and he said adultery was the simplest and quickest way. My ex didn't object as he wanted to remarry anyway and his new partner didn't have to be named. It's not as if you have to go to court and point the finger of blame!
  10. On my solicitor's advice, I took the date as the day that I said to my ex "I want a divorce". He didn't move out until a few months later. The only people who were a pain were HMRC, who wouldn't let me file a claim for tax credits until the day he left, and then took 3 months to process it!
  11. My husband left me over 2 years ago for another woman and, although I've seen a solicitor, I have done nothing yet about getting a divorce. However I have managed to sort out things like the council tax so that I can get the single occupation reduction. This was an absolute pain because my local council created a new account (why?) and then tried to back date charges to the time he walked out. I got very cross with them at times. I had to have a letter from my ex to say he agreed to all previous payments being transferred to the new account. It didn't need to be so difficult if only the council had told me exactly what I needed to prove that he isn't here any more. So my advice would be, when you contact your council, ask and ask again exactly what paperwork they will need and ask about what proof you might need. Don't just be fobbed off with "Fill in the forms." Good luck.
  12. ambi

    ambi New commenter

    Thanks for the info - I will get my a..e into gear this week a bit!

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