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Secret Single Behaviour?

Discussion in 'Personal' started by fantastischfish, Jan 3, 2012.

  1. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    Inspired by an episode of the endlessly trashy but totally entertaining 'Sex and the City'.
    I was recently married and despite basically living together in what WAS my flat for a year we have now properly moved all of his stuff into the flat from his placec and are renting his place out, so it's full time sharing now (you should see the mess, a one-bedroomed flat is just not big enough for all our stuff!)
    But before this happened, we would have certain nights when he didn't stay over; work commitments meaning he would stay over at his place some 20 miles away, or when he would have the lads over for a boozy night at his own flat. Now, he's always there. And there are certain things that I used to do in the privacy and peace of my own flat that I just don't do when he's a round. This is, according to Carrie et all, known as Secret Single Behaviour.
    I'm sure some people have those wonderful relationships where they'd so anything in front of their partner, but I'm talking about those things you liked to do when there's no-one else around and you can just be on your own.
    For example, I like to bake late at night. I put my music on, dance about the kitchen like a nutcase and bake cakes or scones for coffee time the next day. Not that I couldn't bake whilst my husband is there, but it just doesn't feel as nice as doing it whilst all on my own.
    Or a pamper day. When I'm off work, I like to have a day when I just laze about the house with a face mask on, read a book, paint my nails and toe nails, apply body butter all over and generall pamper myself. Again, not something I wouldn't do whilst hubby is there, but just not as nice!
    Poor bloke! So, what is your Secret Single Behaviour?
     
  2. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    Inspired by an episode of the endlessly trashy but totally entertaining 'Sex and the City'.
    I was recently married and despite basically living together in what WAS my flat for a year we have now properly moved all of his stuff into the flat from his placec and are renting his place out, so it's full time sharing now (you should see the mess, a one-bedroomed flat is just not big enough for all our stuff!)
    But before this happened, we would have certain nights when he didn't stay over; work commitments meaning he would stay over at his place some 20 miles away, or when he would have the lads over for a boozy night at his own flat. Now, he's always there. And there are certain things that I used to do in the privacy and peace of my own flat that I just don't do when he's a round. This is, according to Carrie et all, known as Secret Single Behaviour.
    I'm sure some people have those wonderful relationships where they'd so anything in front of their partner, but I'm talking about those things you liked to do when there's no-one else around and you can just be on your own.
    For example, I like to bake late at night. I put my music on, dance about the kitchen like a nutcase and bake cakes or scones for coffee time the next day. Not that I couldn't bake whilst my husband is there, but it just doesn't feel as nice as doing it whilst all on my own.
    Or a pamper day. When I'm off work, I like to have a day when I just laze about the house with a face mask on, read a book, paint my nails and toe nails, apply body butter all over and generall pamper myself. Again, not something I wouldn't do whilst hubby is there, but just not as nice!
    Poor bloke! So, what is your Secret Single Behaviour?
     
  3. v12

    v12

    Dangerous ground I reckon, Eva!
     
  4. I don't think I have 'secret single behaviour' as such, but I do miss just having quiet time on my own with no-one else around.
    Everything else I still do as and when I want - and god help him if he distrubs me or gets in the way!
     
  5. bombaysapphire

    bombaysapphire Star commenter

    I don't think I really have any secret single behaviour. I'll tend to do anything in front of my husband - poor sod!
    I prefer to sit and do nothing when I am on my own. I am much better at getting on with mindless tasks - cleaning, tidying etc when I have company.
     
  6. I wouldn't say I have any secret single behaviour-most of the things I do I have no qualms in doing in front of my boyfriend. I do, however, have times when I want to be completely alone and not talk to or socialise with others and this is what he finds harder to understand than my other qualms.
     
  7. Mrs_Frog

    Mrs_Frog New commenter

    Everyone surely has some secret single behaviour......even if they don't know that they do it! Even things like needing 30 mins of quiet time when you get in does count....
    There are some things that surely have to be SSBs, namely things involving wax strips, or smelly chemicals....
    Its takes time to look this good!
    B x
     
  8. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    True! I have a sign above my kitchen door that reads: "We can't both look good, it's either me or the house".
     
  9. lindenlea

    lindenlea Star commenter

    I agree that dancing around and singing loudly is something best enjoyed on your own. Does your OH never go out Eva? Encourage him to take up a sport. Football and golf have provided me with plenty of "just me" time over the years.
     
  10. oldsomeman

    oldsomeman Star commenter

    When im happy i sing and dance around the kitchen and the house pretending im a world class dancer( i am really but the age and creaky bones get in the way)
    When the mrs is away i return to single behaviour.....i go out and do things i dont otherwise do..and basically eat as i wish.all the foods i dodnt eat because i try and cook for both of us and there is lots of food she dont like lol

     
  11. fantastischfish

    fantastischfish Established commenter

    We are members of the same gym and both have season tickets to the same football team ha ha! I'll just have to encourage him to adpot a drinking habit and send him down the local a couple of times a week!
     
  12. catmother

    catmother Star commenter

    Is your new husband a teacher too? I love MrCatmother to bits but I really enjoy having holidays that he has not got. I love getting up to have a cup of tea with him and go back to bed once he has left.
     
  13. DaisysLot

    DaisysLot Senior commenter

    I have reverted to getting the badger waxed now... but I remember with a previous 'new' half moved in partner that there was the 'awkward' realisation that I could not longer sit watching TV in my knickers with removal cream about my lady garden for half an hour....
     
  14. Ah SSB! I'm 26, single and live alone and have many SSBs! One of the main ones is singing (with expression as if I'm on stage, LOL!) but this is also a hobby as I have been told that I have a good voice. I am also in a choir so my excuse is that belting out Adele's 'Set Fire to the Rain' is all good practice...

    I also treat myself to an embarrassingly trashy magazine once every week, often on a Friday after school when I'm really tired. I always read it in the bath and I'm sure I lose a few brain cells in the process but I secretly love it!
     
  15. Oh and another of my SSBs is my obsession with food and cookbooks. I sometimes read a cookbook like a normal book - i.e. from start to finish! It has, however, resulted in a new hobby (food blogging), proof that SSB can be productive!


    amateurfoodramblings.wordpress.com
     
  16. I think the fact that I do what I want, when I want here in my own house, makes me really reluctant to have to share one day with my lovely fiance.
    We get along so well but I just need 'me' time and lots of it...to do nothing in particular. I'd just hate having to justify 'wasting' my time I suppose, but for me, being free to do whatever I choose and answering to no one is absolute heaven. (I used to feel guilty when I was married if I didn't get things done...now, if they don''t get done today they'll get done tomorrow and if not tomorrow, whenever the mood takes me.) I don't have to be super-efficient and organised any more, or even 'pull my weight' and it's lovely!
    I suspect he enjoys all the time he spends dozing on the sofa, or his TV-watching or conservatory/garden-pottering undisturbed by me. [​IMG]
     
  17. lrw22

    lrw22 Occasional commenter

    Wearing Eeyore/Bagpuss/Tinkerbell pyjamas!
     
  18. I think the only reason Mr Airy and I remain married is that we now have a house big enough that we each have a room to run away to when we want me time!
     
  19. My SSB is probably reading the odd trashy mag too. Get a bit of goss!
    I also still have a comfort blanket which I smell (I know, I'm weird, especially at 35!) and I just can't give it up!
    I like lazing around, reading fb and sometimes just laying on my bed during the daytime. God I'm lazy!!
     
  20. I don't want to lower the tone of this thread but can I just mention the joy of farting when you live on your own. [​IMG]
     

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