I'm hoping to get other people's thoughts on a situation which I can't quite get my head around. Bear with me while I explain... My cousin is 24 years old and has just finished his second year of his first teaching post at a school where I used to work. He's been very happy there, gets on well with many of his colleagues and has received very positive feedback from his HoD and SLT. At the beginning of last year, a new TA started work at the school. She was aged 20 at the time and was a former student of the school, having studied there to the end of 6th form. Obviously she had left by the time my cousin started working there, but had been taught by other members of staff. She and my cousin got to know each other thanks to running a sports club together, and eventually it turned into a romance around Easter. They didn't broadcast this but it wasn't a secret either, so most of the staff were aware. They are far from being the only couple among the staff, as seems to happen in a lot of schools. Earlier this week I went for coffee with a former colleague who still works at the same school, and out of the blue, she told me that I "need to have a word" with my cousin "because he needs to know what people are saying about him going out with that TA". I can't be doing with gossip and I don't see that it's anyone else's business, and said as much to her, but she insisted on telling me that people find it wrong for him to be going out with a former student of the school, she's too young for him (less than a 3 year age gap!), it's not appropriate for him to socialise with her friends who used to go to the school and might have siblings there, it makes people uncomfortable to have her there on staff nights out, they aren't behaving professionally because they're friends with former students of the school (her peers!) on social media and it's against the school rules for staff to friend former students on social media, it's going to affect his professional relationships with colleagues, and so on. The situation is a bit blurred, because I do see the potential issues with employing a former student, and why some staff might feel uncomfortable about working with someone they only taught a few years ago, but SLT were presumably aware of this when they hired her and if there are any genuine concerns that's surely for them to deal with. Should people never be able to work at the school where they studied? I've known several teachers who've gone back to their old school, often at a very early stage in their career or during their training, so it's not uncommon. I absolutely don't see that my cousin is doing anything wrong - his girlfriend and her friends had already left the school when he started working there so as far as he's concerned she's no different to any of his other colleagues, they've been entirely professional about their relationship while at work, and neither of them really socialise with other staff apart from at specific work events so there's no issue with his colleagues potentially finding themselves on a night out with former students. Yes, both of them are friends with former students on social media - but they're her peers and had all left the school before my cousin started, so for me I really don't see that it's an issue. On the other hand, if it's school policy that staff must not friend former students then does that count even for staff who were not there at the same time as them? I don't want my cousin to get into trouble, but it would seem ludicrous for him to be banned from socialising with people of his age group because they used to go to the school where he now works. My initial reaction was that of course I'm not going to talk to my cousin about his relationship, especially based on hearsay from someone in a cafe - it's none of my business and I think it was totally unprofessional of my former colleague to ask me to get involved. On the other hand, if people are saying these things then do I have a duty to tell my cousin? Not with a view to interfering in his relationship, but so that he is not kept in the dark about something which concerns him and which could, rightly or wrongly, affect his professional life. What do people think? Should I say something to him? And is he doing anything which could be seen as inappropriate?