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Discussion in 'Teaching abroad' started by SMT dude, Mar 29, 2012.
That's quite a busy week for Mai Tai.!!
I would be very gentle.
"It not wife," said Mai tai after a moment. "It that wenkler Smeagol. He say he pine for you. He say he not pleased that you with Priscilla. He say he don't mind you be with man, only woman."
"Smeagol," said the Dude, with that certain air that Heads affect. "What's the problem, now?"
"Two members of the PE Dept have dropped a couple of commas so I thought it best to recall all the Reports and have the staff do them over again," said Smeagol. "Some of the staff have complained so I've turned the AC off in their kennels."
"How often have I told you?" said the Dude. "It's all about motivation."
"I have said that the first one to write all his reports over again will get a chance in the contract renewal lottery," said Smeagol nervously. "But...well...really I was thinking of the time we were In Puntland taking over that school...and I just miss those days. Remember the broken marriages, the nervous breakdowns, the time we had the Biology dept do that thing with the Cholera? Oh! How we laughed."
"Pull yourself together, Smeagol," said the Dude firmly. " And remember - we'll always have Basra."
"Basra" was always enough to clamp Smeagol's villainous gob, and Dude allowed himself a crooked smile as he cradled the phone and gave Mai Tai's bottom a mock-affectionate vicious pinch.
Still, he was shaking queasily and felt a rivulet of sweat seeping through the rich cotton weave of his Jermyn Street striped shirt. That stupid joke of impersonating Mrs D would be avenged.
A call to the chief of police whose psychotic son Dude had always protected from suspension... a Friday night raid on a certain downtown leather-and-cocaine bar... 36 hours in the cells with the drunken fans of FC Brutafoda... that would make Smeagers think twice about playing the smartypants again.
The bathroom door slid open and a humid gust of powder and perfume preceded striking stark naked valkyrie Priscilla, two metres tall in her temporarily unstockinged feet, the finest fiercest flower that Cheltenham and Newnham ever offered to the oldest profession. The only 'business girl' in London who knew what ToK was all about. And that was the least of her talents. But since turning fifty-five, the Dude had found her increasingly disconcerting.
"On the blower to sweaty Smeagol again, little man? Can't let go of your pathetic province of educational empire for one moment, can you? Well, the bathroom's free, so get in there and do something about that dandruff, and then please fak orf to a pub and buy yourself one of those Guinness thingies and see if you can pick up a kiwi teacher. It's my turn with Mai Tai now..."
Nice one Dude.
This is definitely your conceit.
Would this be a kinda Widmerpools thingy?
You can tell that you - and Priscilla - are not working in a UK school, Dude.
The more correct phrasing nowadays would be: "'It's Mai Tai's turn to have me now, if she would like to' said Priscilla".
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