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Potty training...

Discussion in 'Parenting' started by clematis, Nov 18, 2011.

  1. ...where to begin?! We have the knickers, the potty (abandoned in favour of the toilet training seat thingy that goes on the normal toilet) and the toddler (21 months) who keeps insisting on ripping off her nappy, tells us when she's done/doing a wee and a poo, and is obsessed with all things toilet related. Do I take a few days out of our schedule (!) and just let her run around in knickers, weeing everywhere, til she realises she's wet and asks to go on the toilet? I am a bit wary as I have an 8 week old baby at the moment too and was hoping to wait til he was a little older but I'm not sure if she'll let me! Help!
  2. FollyFairy

    FollyFairy Occasional commenter

    when you daughter takes off her nappy and says she is doing a wee/poo - is she actually doing it and doing it in the right place?? If so, this is a massive step in the right direction! Have you tried pull-ups instead of nappies? My daughter never took to the potty, went straight to the toilet - which does make it easier. Can she reach the toilet okay or does she need a little step? if you are not keen in her running around weeing everywhere, an alternative is to take time out of your schedule for a few days and put on her on the toilet every hour... will be boring and tiresome but may save the mess! What also worked for my daughter was a star chart - every time she went to the toilet correctly, not just sat there but used it!, she received a star... which at the end of the week, if she had enough say 20, was exchanged for a trip to a toy aisle... good luck!
  3. If I were you, I would put her in pants during the day and forget about pull ups and nappies (apart from at night time, obviously) - be prepared for accidents, but if she's aware that she needs to use the toilet, she'll be trained within a week or two, I reckon. My son was similar at that age and he was pretty much trained before his second birthday - much to my (and my bank balance's) delight!
  4. my daughter same age - 21 months - asked to start potty training the other day. She had 2 days in pants (I am a believer, in theory, that all or nothing is best in that it's clearer than pull ups etc, as accidents have an impact and therefore there is incentive to get it right and it's clear when they are weeing - mine 'trickled' a lot during these days (I think with slight tension about it all / excitement she did little tinkles in potty having not fully relaxed then a few minutes later let rip all over the floor!).)
    She had very little success in that only one or two wees went in potty (and were often followed by 'aftershocks' on the floor). She was, though, really adamant she wanted to do it. So 2 days in (and yes, I would suggest you clear your schedule to be honest) with still very little success (stars and notebook and pretty pants and potty and toilet seat in place) she woke up one morning, asked for her night nappy to be changed (not removed) and then firmly but politely asked for potty to be put away.
    I think she was mentally ready and understands etc but just wasn't quite as in charge of her bladder movements as she needs to be physically. She talks about potty a lot still (this was a couple of weeks ago) but is ok with the conversation being that we'll try when she's a bit bigger.
    So we went 100% back to nappies and will try 100% (daytime) knickers again a little in the future.
    Whilst using the loo is useful, I'd suggest potty too. We only have a loo upstairs and there were lots of little dashes. Pregnant and sore as I am (or indeed with another littl'un as I will be) I can't hoist her up the stairs repeatedly and instantly. If she hadn't had a potty available very close by everything would have been on floor I think.
  5. Its a difficult one I might at her age put her into pull ups and give her the option of using a potty if she wants. I think that all out potty training with a 2 month old would be a nightmare. Even if they potty train easily you have a few weeks where they need a lot of help - not easy when you are feeding baby. Also I found with my daughter (potty trained at 2.4) I had to seize the moment and go out after a big wee in the first couple of weeks which if you are doing the same with baby feeds is pretty unworkable. She is also very young but I think it is important to get the timing right and I think they have little windows where they are receptive and obviously she is in one. But if you feeling brave then put her into pants!
  6. Put her in pants during the day. Once she's wet them about six or seven times, she'll start asking for the potty.

    It worked for us...
  7. Mine this morning again really really keen to try. It's been quite a few weeks since that first couple of days trying. I am not really ready, but reluctant to ignore her when she is asking so clearly for something important to her.
    We've had a nightmare morning. A couple of accidents, lots of potty sitting (big improvement on last time where it was difficult to get her to sit for 30 seconds) and one tiny little trickle in potty! However the nightmare comes because she is getting really really distressed. I don't care if I have to mop up wee on the carpet or do extra washing - no problem. But she took to having her pants round her knees or ankles (i think she was worried about wetting them but wanted them on) and had HYSTERICS if I tried to help her put them up or off. She got very upset and that was the state she was in when she did her trickle on potty. Not ideal! The suggestion that maybe she'd like her nappy on because she was feeling worried about it also met with SCREAMING hysterics. Daddy was out for an hour and she was wailing for him.
    I don't mind accidents, I'm in a position to dedicate the time to her as I am 22 weeks pregnant so not having to focus on 2 kids (do hope all this is sorted by the time baby arrives - I don't envy you, Clematis!!). But I cannot stand it to cause her such complete panic and distress - it can't be healthy! I feel like she is so so keen to do it but can't manage it yet and not sure what to do. Eventually daddy's come home and she's let him cuddle her to calm her down (wouldn't let me at all) and consented to a nappy for sleep. She's therefore crashed out for a very early nap. I'm hoping against hope that she does what she did last time and chooses to do nappies again for a bit. Forcing her into nappies also not helpful.
    Sorry for self indulgent rant but horrible morning and can't bear to see her so distressed. Any advice willingly sought! I have of already told her how proud we are of her and how hard she's been trying, but that lots of little girls find it very very difficult and that she can have nappies on if she wants, until she's a bit bigger.
  8. She'd just turned two. Now she wears pants in the daytime (asks to go to the bathroom) and training pants at night. Haven't even attempted night-time training yet...
  9. Thankfully after a long sleep she chose to keep on nappy and put potty away in cupboard to try again another time. Phew! Bless her little heart, don't want it to be traumatic! Freud would have a field day...

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