Hi all, just looking for any advice about a pupil in my nursery class, i have my own ideas about him but wondering what anybody else can suggest. The boy will be 4 in January but very often poos or wees himself and doesnt seem to have any idea that hes done it. His mum says he is too shy to ask to go the toilet. His physical development is very delayed, his wrists are extremely stiff. has poor fine motor control. Cannot hold a pencil properly. he goes into his own world during group stories and music time, starts using his hands to play lions and cars etc, but is completely cut off from what is going on around him. Has lack of communication with adults and peers, makes lots of funny noises, tongue is always out of his mouth and he dribbles alot. Went on a trip the other day, and he was completely lost, the activity was very interactive, the children were free to press buttons, play on their own, all the other children were very involved, he stood there, head down looking at the floor, playing with his hands,. I tried to encourage him to participate but he resisted, shaking his head and still playing with his fingers. he will not make eye contact. I know its difficult to make judgements without actually seeing the child, but would be grateful for anybodys opinions. As i said at the start, i have my own ideas about what could be up with him but maybe i am off the wrong track, maybe it could be something else. Have spoken to his mum about his toileting and his hand movements and she says he is shy so wont ask to go to the toilet, and he uses his hands in that way when he is dancing.. For a 4 year old he is completely lost within the class, and will only get further away from the rest of the group. Any ideas, and the best way forward now?? Am not in England so dont have a SENCO but i do want the mum to start to realise that this is not shyness. There is no way i can see him coping in reception, and am worried about the prospects of him if the mum doesnt accept it soon.