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Poems/rules about how to work with a teaching assistant

Discussion in 'Teaching assistants' started by philippa1412, Jun 20, 2008.

  1. Does anyone have any poem or humourous text about working with a TA - or how to work with a TA? thanks
  2. Does anyone have any poem or humourous text about working with a TA - or how to work with a TA? thanks
  3. give me a bit of time, I'll try and come up with something!
  4. thanks carolinewirral - look forward to it
  5. philippa1412,as you can clearly see literacy is not really my 'thing' so try not to laugh too much.

    Tell them your rules, your foibles? and quirks
    It?s quicker that way, sorted first day.
    Ask for advice, go on just be nice,
    You don?t need to take it, you could just fake it?
    Share your concerns, joke if you can, the days are too long-have your own song?
    A bit tongue in cheek you say, I?m not usually this meek.
    There?s no right or wrong, there?s no little song,
    Strike the right balance, work on strengths,
    Make it a team, a force to be reckoned with,
    The kids will enjoy it and know where they stand,
    You could even let your T.A. be your right hand!
  6. There we go, my literacy efforts?sad on a Friday evening or what?

    Please Mrs Poppleton can you be the class TA?
    I?d like you first of all to take the naughty ones away.
    Please keep them out the classroom, I?ll send them as a set
    I?ll keep the higher ability and the teacher?s pet.

    Please Mrs Poppleton can you be the class TA?
    I need you to get some art stuff out, particularly the clay.
    Mind it?s very heavy, please don?t put your back at risk
    I?d love to help you move it, but I may also slip a disc.

    Please Mrs Poppleton, can you be the class TA?
    We?re going on a trip out, and it will last the day.
    I?ll place you near the sick bucket on the Year One bus
    I know how well you cope and you never make a fuss.

    Please Mrs Poppleton, can you be the class TA?
    I?d really like to know if you could take my PPA
    It?s Monday afternoon and I?ve planned the science lesson well
    (However do not worry if the rats begin to smell)

    Please Mrs Poppleton, can you be the class TA?
    I thought you?d like to go outside and supervise the play.
    I normally have this duty but my doctor advises me,
    To stay inside the staffroom when it gets to minus 3.

  7. bluebell27

    bluebell27 New commenter

    These are great!
  8. I love them!!

    Jilly, you are a genius!!
  9. You won! :( :(
    I can add up better than I can write poems :)
  10. chey

    chey New commenter

    JillyE I love it - do you mind if I copy it for our staffroom ?
  11. Jilly, that is fab, here is my humble offering which can in no way compare with yours but I hope it brings a smile.

    TA Interview

    Do you think you can sing?
    Would we laugh when you dance?
    Do you know half the class
    Spend all day in a trance?

    We need English grammar
    Someone who can spell
    Decipher a stammer
    And you won?t mind the smell?

    Can you do extra hours?
    Without any pay?
    Can you make perfect flowers?
    With dried out clay?

    Are you able to test
    At the end of each term?
    Without getting stressed
    Or going down with a germ?

    Can you form a display
    To make the school proud?
    Not causing dismay?
    That?s just not allowed

    You may need to cover
    At the drop of a hat
    A class full of thirty
    It isn?t all that

    Can you count really well?
    Are you good at Math?
    Could you give Gabrielle
    A daily sponge bath?

    Are you hot on division?
    Do you colour in?
    Can you perform circumcision?
    And then empty the bin.

    Have we mentioned the sick?
    And then there?s the pooh?
    Will you go on our trip?
    How are you with glue?

    How is your Art?
    And what about paint?
    Can you use the board Smart?
    Can you cope with restraint?

    Have you first aid training?
    Can you fashion a sling?
    You won?t mind any staining?
    And the parent?s you?ll ring?

    Then sign here promptly
    Before you realise
    It?s a fait accompli
    Before my glad eyes!

    A. Fool (Mrs)
  12. thank you all so much - I just couldn't get started on this - they are brilliant.
  13. Chey - glad you liked the poem. That's absolutely fine to copy it.....very flattered. Thank you
  14. JillyE, that's FAB!!

    How about this for another verse?

    Please Mrs Poppleton, I'm feeling very sick,
    So you're in charge today, (though UNISON will have a fit),
    Yes I KNOW your pay is peanuts, and I KNOW you shouldn't do it.....
    But the head insists if that's alright,
    (Another 50p an hour should do it).
  15. JillyE - get yourself to a publisher quick, you are a STAR!
  16. chey

    chey New commenter

    JillyE - thank you - copied and will be up in the staffroom on Monday :)

    Good job my head has a sense of humour !
  17. bluebell27

    bluebell27 New commenter

    Have to say Yours was also very good carolinewirral . You should post this on management site. Might just come in use for interviews [haha]
  18. JillyE .... that was fab! How true those words are!!! Well done!

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