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Phrases that should be allowed in the classroom...

Discussion in 'Primary' started by mprimaryz, Oct 9, 2011.

  1. Your site? I wonder if you could go and take a nosy at my profile. Because I'm listed as a Teacher, and sub-listed as home-educator. I didn't put those options there, but yes, this is obviously your (collective) site.
  2. lillipad

    lillipad New commenter

    I actually said today: "I expect he punched you because you punched him first. That's what happens in life." oops. Mum'll be in tomorrow.
  3. I see the atmosphere hoovers are sucking their way through the thread...
  4. I sincerely hope a few of my school's parents read these comments - that way we get to tell them a few home truths, without getting fired for it - result!
    Many of the teachers on this thread are also parents - myself included. I would be happy for a teacher to point out many of the 'home truths' on here to my child - even though that's probably not necessary as my children already hear them from me, and are (I like to think) nicer, less arrogant children as a result.
  5. To all home educating learning providers (I assume that as 'teacher' represents such an awful profession you wouldn't want to be called that?).

    You have the pleasure of teaching the one or two people that you love more than life itself - your children. You have the freedom to choose what you teach, when you teach it, and for how long. If an opportunity presents itself - say an eclipse, a snowstorm, or a royal visit - you can take advantage of it and go out to incorporate it into your learning. You can spend as long as it takes on an individual piece of learning; extending it if it's going well or cutting it short to be revisited another day if its not. You can go to the loo when you want.

    In the real world of general, everyday teaching we're dealing with 30+ of other people's little darlings every hour for five hours a day (depending on the school's timetable). On average, of these 30+ there will be a couple absent, meaning that the lesson will need to be repeated for them on their return whilst also teaching a variety of catch-ups to others and the current lesson to the very few that have attended all lessons; there will be a few who are disruptive and just don't want to learn nor do they want to allow anyone else to learn; there will be a couple of SEN/EAL/others who need specialised teaching, but I don't usually have an LSA assigned to my lessons; the rest will be a mixture of bored/enthusiastic, can't be bothered/want to learn, like the subject/hate the subject, and so on. I have to teach what I'm told, when I'm told to, and within the given constraints of a timetabled lesson. If I want to take kids out of school I have a battery of forms to fill in, prior notice of a term given, all parents contacted and replies received back, prove how this will fit in to the learning requirements, and so on. Last year I had a yr 9 class with two students who were doing their GCSE two years early, two with statements, and one who was a refugee illiterate in his own language and with no English, the lesson had to be differentiated for all of them, taught in the time allowed, and all pupils had to make progress. All of this is every lesson, every day - and I haven't even started on target setting, parent's evenings, OfSTED, learning accountability, reports, assessment, etc, etc, etc..... Oh, and on my duty day I have to go from 8:40 to 13:10 without the loo!

    Is it surprising we are sometimes slightly less than perfect? Or that we need to let off steam?

    To all you high-and-mighty, absolutely-perfect-in-every-way, home educators. Try walking a mile in our shoes before you throw your viscious, slanderous, and for the most part unfounded stones at us who are trying our best in far less than perfect conditions. Let's see how long it would be before your god/goddess-like personas slip.
  6. PS: It's still the best ever job!
  7. Hear hear ee_ore *pat on the back.*

    There is nothing more infuriating or demoralising than pious sanctimonious people. Everyone's comments are anonymous and not hurting anyone for that reason.

    People need to appreciate all the extra hours teachers put in because they care and want the best for their classes. For me often a lot of this is through good will, not just because we have to. Of course we are going to occasionally get tired and stressed.
  8. I have laughed and laughed at this thread - thank you!
    even inspired me to add my own contribution (probably doubling my post
    Actually, it really belongs to my Secondary School
    Economics Teacher, returning an essay to one of my classmates, said "You
    can polish ********, but it still smells..."
    I can't think I've
    ever really wanted to say it to a pupil but oh, I've lost count of the
    times I wanted to say it someone from the LA...
  9. Fabulous, couldn't agree more- people who work in high pressure jobs tend to develop a strong sense of cameraderie and a sense of humour that sees them through the challenging moments. Staff rooms are full of jokes and ribaldry that some may see in a negative light-it is just letting off steam. Better that people say these things within a forum post and not to the student's face! The teachers that I know are hard working, dedicated and go that extra mile for the children that they teach but they are at the end of the day human- If only the saintly and sanctimonious were allowed into teaching it would be a darn sight more boring for those that they teach.

  10. Minimummy, So then, you've got time to write up a profile....?!
  11. This thread is hillarious and great therapy!
    My personal one at the moment is 'right, I'm adding you to my **** list'. Other than that I'd like to use many of those already posted - obviously in my head only!
    Keep them coming!

  12. Totally agree.
  13. Please don't use the word '****', there are delicate eyes watching this thread that may get upset ... instead talk about five-H-one-T. Should this not be sufficient for the given situation you could resort to level two: three-U-one-one. Level 3 is a combination of the two: 3u115h1t.
  14. Yes I tend to go with that theory...it's amazing what you can get away with if you smile sweetly or laugh at the end of it.

  15. :D
  16. Sadly I have used both of these!
    teaching BTEC level 2 and got fed up with doing monotone mum 'put your phone away, put your phone away' so I said to 16 year old boy " I am not sure what you are playing with under the desk, but I sincerely hope its your phone" 16yob " OMG, its my phone" waving it at me, me: " well put it in your bag and keep your hands above the desk" general hilarity from other students and no phone problems for the rest of the term from 16yob
    to student complaining they cannot import an image into powerpoint Me"ah, an IDtenT problem" (ID10T)
    I keep threatening to bring a bucket of water into class and to drop any phones/mp3 players I see into it, its one of my favourite fantasies
  17. home education does not equal humour bypass, I home educated both of my children (who are now at uni) and I am enjoying teaching other people's children but it is hard stressful work. Lighten up and allow us to let off steam or leave the room
  18. Robyn,
    speak out, tell them you're here to teach not just to keep inspectors and observers happy.
    You'll get a reputation for being honest and straightforward. Your colleagues will thank you for saying aloud, what they wanted to say. Your bosses will learn that some of us are here because we like teaching.
    There's nothing wrong with a lively and frank exchange of views. You also begin to learn some new and interesting expressions - like "glass ceiling".

  19. Slightly worried by this as my name is Bower! Dare I ask the meaning?
  20. Duurr! Forget it - just realised it says 'BOVVERED with a double V.... Sorreee....

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