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Offspring at same school - advice please?

Discussion in 'Personal' started by PennyAM, Oct 17, 2011.

  1. magic surf bus

    magic surf bus Star commenter

    Even if you live in the local high school's catchment area and your children have been to one of its partner primary schools? There is still such a thing as community - I wasn't prepared to send my kids to another high school where none of their long-established friends were going. It's that simple. I didn't like being in the same school as them but I put up with it for their sakes.
  2. I went to a good grammar school that took from a wide area, as such quite a few teachers had children in my school. I vividly remember the day that the head of upper school came in to talk to us about contraception, I was sat next to one of her twin boys (we were in the same form all the way through). Needless to say he wanted the ground to swallow him up when she started discussing what she herself used for contraception. I also remember the Head of MFLs son coming out of our GCSE French oral exam and desperately asking me what the french for chicken was as he'd had a mental block during the exam. I don't remember anyone being particularly damaged by having their parents in the same school, it was weird going to their house after school but it was nice too. Even though the school took from a large area we had a reall community feel and some teachers walked to school. Some of the kids were taught by their parents because of timetabling (eg, there was only one latin teacher in the school) and like others have said it seemed to be that 'issues' were dealt with by the other parent or after school like for any other parent.
  3. How ludicrous. I think I've turned out fine. And as another poster says, sometimes you have no choice. The school was the only school in town; it was either that or be separated from all my primary school friends and go to another school 13 miles away, where I knew no-one and would have been 'trespassing' into ready-made groups of friends from that town's local primary feeder schools. I think that would have caused more anxiety for an 11 year old than being vaguely aware that a parent, who you may or may not have seen floating around your school, was teaching in the same building as you.
  4. That's your interpretation and that of your teacher parents.
    Yes, well, I am sure little yellow could not be expected to do what all other children do, which is to go to a school where the rent were not around.
    Come off it!
  5. How heartening to see that mature debate is so prevalent amongst those educating our young.

    As it happens, it's far more important for children who are making the transition from primary to secondary to feel safe, happy and secure. If I lived in an inner city area then yes, I might have had to go to another school and suck it up, but in the very rural community where I was brought up you went to that one secondary school in your town, and to go elsewhere would have been very strange. Either that, or my parent moved schools which, as I'm sure you'll appreciate, isn't easy for a teacher to do in a rural area where there's about 7 secondary schools within a 20 mile radius. And as it happens, I was one of several children who had parents working at the school (including the HT's children!), so if they could handle it, why couldn't I? Or would little yellow have been too precious to handle what other children could?

    The OP has probably been in the same position, where she's had very little choice but to send her child there. It's nothing to do with being a control freak parent, or perpetuating nepotism, but actually weighing up which situation is likely to be of the least stress and worry to your child.
  6. anon8315

    anon8315 Established commenter

    I attended the same secondary school my mum taught at. In hindsight it isn't an experience I'd choose to repeat (I accept some have little or no choice in the matter.) The stress of being at 'close quarters' was quite intense at times: we once had a row because she told me off for walking across the yard when I was in a lesson and was disrupting her own lesson (Miss there's your daughter!) Annoying for her and for me, after all from my fifteen year old point of view I had every right to walk across the playground!
    I really did feel very pressured at school and it was just an embarrassing experience overall, for me to have to behave perfectly and be a bit of a "teacher's pet" - this was a pretty normal comprehensive. I can see that in an independent school it might be different. I think we were both overjoyed when I left to go to sixth form college. I'm not in touch with anyone from secondary school now although I have many friends from college, university and work places and I think in hindsight that there was this need to keep others at a distance. I could never confide in my friends about my family being a pain or tell embarrassing stories or jokes about them as of course she'd be teaching them.
    Sorry for the essay - and from the other side of the coin, I have a teacher's daughter in my class this year. She's sweet in a way but very demanding: if her book or coursework isn't marked immediately she wants to know why - and I really want to have a firm word with her but feel awkward in doing so.

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