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Newly single

Discussion in 'Personal' started by Cervinia, May 15, 2011.

  1. Cervinia

    Cervinia Occasional commenter

    Doesn't sound like a workable long term solution.
    • You came to the decision to leave him for good reasons (?).
    • It is natural that you will miss someone you care(d) about, whoever's decision it was.
    Good luck.
  2. BelleDuJour

    BelleDuJour Star commenter

    That is so tough. I don't think I could go on living together but apart. Hope you get yourself sorted soon for both your sakes.
  3. starbuck

    starbuck New commenter

    we both decided to stay in the flat as a short term solution until we can sell or one of us can buy the other out. didn't realise how bloody difficult it would be. on the plus side- can't stand being home so I'm working long hours; paperwork is up to date and I look like super teacher to my management team ;)
  4. Victoria Plum

    Victoria Plum New commenter

    There's always a silver lining! Well done for making a brave decision to end something that obviously wasn't right for you. I STILL miss my ex at times, we broke up last October, it was my idea to split up and he WAS a waste of space for six years, so it's perfectly normal to feel like that. I know what you mean about feeling like an old spinster! It terrifies me that I might not meet someone else. Mind you, as someone pointed out to me, better to be alone and happy than with someone and miserable. And that's very true. Good luck with everything starbuck. xxx
  5. starbuck

    starbuck New commenter

    Thank you Vic, you are right about being 'alone and happy'. you are a sensible woman! xxx
  6. Victoria Plum

    Victoria Plum New commenter

    Why, thank you!! Trust me, I AM very happy now! I have a busy social life, good friends and family. Although I have the occasional moments of loneliness and despair that I will "be on my own forever", I can't believe the difference in myself now I am single. You often don't realise how much someone is bringing you down until they are out of your life. I hope you get things sorted with the flat soon so that you can really move on. xxx
  7. Victoria Plum

    Victoria Plum New commenter

    *waves to sparkly_duck* Hope you are well? xxx
  8. Suppose you are in a harder situation than me - marriage ended but I have 3 gorgeous children so happy to spend as many years as it takes to be there for them.
    Miss my ex - but my mantra is " What i miss doesn't exist". Basically the husband I had is a different person now.
    Things will look better when you have your own space.

  9. marmot.morveux

    marmot.morveux New commenter

    I'm feeling exactly the same as you ladies. Have just split up...and like you I'm worried about being lonely...having said that I've been getting together lately with people in a similar situation to me at work. It's amazing just how many nice people there are out there and I wish I'd known them when I was in a relationship.

    I used to be very confident; my self-esteem has decreased. I'm amazed at how many people think they can try to change their other half and make unproductive comments or behave in that way, without realising the effect they're having on the other person.

    Anyway, I'm better off single for the moment, I just must keep on telling myself not to jump into another relationship for wont of being in a couple rather than being single. I'm glad I've read this thread, it's made me feel better. When you're in your 30s watching your friends pairing off and having kids, you feel so pressurised...

  10. y4me

    y4me New commenter

    I'm not with anyone, haven't been for many years, and am very happy with the way my life has turned out!
  11. starbuck

    starbuck New commenter

    I know what you mean, for years I was the only one of my friends in a relationship; now that I'm single they have all paired off! I don't have anyone to go out 'on the pull' with ;)
  12. starbuck

    starbuck New commenter

    Yes I think you're right, I feel like I'm living in limbo right now. Its a very strange situation.
    by the way F, that is a good mantra, I will try to adopt it x
  13. I was just like this for years after splitting up with my long term girlfriend you will probably feel like it for ages but remember the things that made you split up in the first place.
    Get out of that flat as soon as possible!

  14. Sorry I just reaised I am the only boy on the thread! Hope thats ok!
  15. Victoria Plum

    Victoria Plum New commenter

    Starbuck! I would go out on the pull with you! I've managed to find some single friends by joining a couple of local social groups, which has made me feel a bit better cos all my friends are paired up now. I've made one good friend in particular who I'm going on a singles night at the Horse Races with!! LOL xxx
  16. Victoria Plum

    Victoria Plum New commenter

    That sounds a bit stupid!! I meant my previous friends are all paired up and some of new friends are single!! D'uh!!
  17. Go on the pull but you cant take them home - you will have to go back to theirs!!
  18. Victoria Plum

    Victoria Plum New commenter

    regencyrob!! What do you take me for??!! I would NEVER go back to a strange man's house!!! LOL
  19. Victoria Plum

    Victoria Plum New commenter

    Ah!! I think you meant starbuck, didn't you?! Tee hee!!
  20. So what are the boundaries of a first date?
    A kiss?
    A cuddle?
    Just a drink and a dance?

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