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New child in the class

Discussion in 'Primary' started by oneinamil, Feb 10, 2016.

  1. oneinamil

    oneinamil New commenter

    Hey all,

    I have a new child in my year 3 class and she's been in school for about 3 weeks or so.

    Today her mum said some children have been picking out her, excluding her from games and calling her names. And she's not getting anyone to play with. She told me the names and I spoke to the children, they all denied it. But apologised if she had taken offense.

    This child has some tendencies that make me feel a bit weary with what she's saying. I also don't know if I trust that she was wholly telling the truth.

    How exactly would you keep an eye out on this child? I've buddied her up and children ask her to play but she says no. But then she says she doesn't have anyone to play with so I just don't know what to do?

    Sorry for the essay!!
  2. whitestag

    whitestag Senior commenter

    From experience, don't pander to her. She wants the attention created by causing a fuss and complaining nobody will play with her. You've buddied her up and if she wants friends then she has to try and put some effort in herself and not refuse to play. Some children can be little martyrs at times.

    She's probably low in self-confidence and it is daunting joining a new school when friendship groups are already established. She might just need a little time and sometimes friendships grow more slowly.

    I would gently explain to her that she has to try and join in some games and also remind the others to include her. Then ease off and let her find her own way. I would also get parents on board and ask them to give her the same message.

    It's hard to give specific advice without knowing the child. But sometimes, you do get a child who really rubs others up the wrong way and so ends up left out, because they want everything on their terms and they have no concept of compromise. You can hardly blame the other children! And I'm afraid that sort of lack of social skill is often already there by the time they reach school age.
  3. oneinamil

    oneinamil New commenter

    Thanks for your reply. I really appreciate it. As a nqt, I'm never entirely sure if I'm handling something correctly.

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