1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hi Guest, welcome to the TES Community!

    Connect with like-minded professionals and have your say on the issues that matter to you.

    Don't forget to look at the how to guide.

    Dismiss Notice

Needy parents

Discussion in 'Primary' started by lillipad, Jan 25, 2012.

  1. lillipad

    lillipad New commenter

    I seem to have inherited a class where the parents are more needy and wanting of my attention than their children! How do I politely ask them to back off? It's often really trivial things or for a moan about something I'm not doing for their child (who is the only child in the class apparently) I restricted it to home times but I'm so tired of the same faces at the door each day!
     
  2. lillipad

    lillipad New commenter

    I seem to have inherited a class where the parents are more needy and wanting of my attention than their children! How do I politely ask them to back off? It's often really trivial things or for a moan about something I'm not doing for their child (who is the only child in the class apparently) I restricted it to home times but I'm so tired of the same faces at the door each day!
     
  3. I have this problem every year at my school. The parents are very 'needy', very petty and very pushy (although obviously I have some lovely parents as well!)
    I have learned to nod, smile, occasionally get cross back and generally try to get them out the door asap before going back to doing everything poretty much as before.
    Luckily, I have a supportive Head who knows exactly what they're like, so that helps. We also have a school policy of not allowing parents on the premises without an appointment, although this doesn't always work!
     
  4. jessifleur

    jessifleur New commenter

    I really feel for you, have had a similar experience where parents were used to choosing who their child sat with and then when I was unwilling to move children based on parental likes and dislikes or arguments between children from 3 school years ago - fireworks, tears, threats... thank goodness for supportive Head!
    a) I try and turn their questions around to what they could be doing so resolve the perceived problem (have actually said "so what is your plan to deal with this at home"!) this can give them a more realistic boundary of with whom responsibility for their child actually lies and where school ends and parenting begins! :D
    b) Use your experience to your advantage, some parents genuinely do think that their child is the first/only child to experience things (or are worried that this is the case if they don´t have much contact with children other than their own). I share examples of how the problem has been solved successfully in the past.
    c) Make sure the meeting is on your terms, if they turn up every night at the classroom door, discuss the problem at the door rather than creating a formal meeting where things can ramble on.
    d) Don't be afraid to say no! You know if you are doing your best for the children in your class. If you don't think a meeting is necessary, say so (y'know but maybe in a nice way!) this means not always being available - which can be difficult as a caring teacher but in the long run it can improve things. Making an appointment for the next day (or day after if you can push it!) often reduces the urgency of the problem- you'll know when it reallyis important.

    Hope this helps. Persevere and stay polite, professional and firm - you'll stop the fuss-pots! :D
     

Share This Page