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Moving to the UAE as a single mother

Discussion in 'Teaching abroad' started by sdvuba, Sep 14, 2020.

  1. sdvuba

    sdvuba New commenter

    I was wondering whether it is possible to move with my child to the UAE for a teaching job? Does anyone have experience in this? Is there support for you as a parent? My son is currently 20 months old. TIA!
     
  2. february31st

    february31st Established commenter

    There are numerous threads on this if you do a search.

    Secondly if it is your real picture I would change it.

    The UAE is a strick religious country where you can be give 20 lashes for holding a member of the opposite sex who is not an immediate relative.

    It is possible but this adds additional complications to your application a school may not want to deal with and impossible without the written consent of the childs father.
     
  3. sdvuba

    sdvuba New commenter

    Thanks for the reply.

    I have tried to search for some threads related to this post but I can't seem to find any, that's why I resorted to posting about it.

    I have changed my picture but I don't understand why you recommended that I do so. Could you please elaborate.

    I can have the written consent of the father as this won't be an issue but I do understand that this may be an unnecessary process for schools to deal with.
     
  4. gulfgolf

    gulfgolf Established commenter

    I knew many single parents in the ME. Yes, it is doable, with the written consent, etc.
    Decent schools will be fine with this, as it really isn't that hard to arrange compared to everything else.
    It's always good to be anonymous on here. One never knows who might be reading, and how it might be interpreted.
    You should be able to hire a full-time nanny for your son, which provides you the support you need for being at work even if he's sick or it's parent-teacher evening.
     
  5. moscowbore

    moscowbore Star commenter


    You will probably need more than just written consent.
    You will probably need a court document which states that the father agrees to let the child out of the country.
    Please check this. A recent poster lost a job in Qatar on this very issue.
     
  6. markedout

    markedout Occasional commenter

    Sometimes it can also depend on whether you were ever married to the father - if not, then your chances of gaining employment are further reduced.

    However, why stick to the UAE? There are numerous international schools in far less conservative countries where no one will give two hoots about your child's parentage.
     
  7. sdvuba

    sdvuba New commenter

    Thanks for the reply and info

    The father of the child and I were never married but we are still together (hoping to get married one day).

    The reason I chose the UAE are the salary packages that they offer. I need to save up some money even if I go teach there for 2-3 years that will be enough for me. What other countries would you recommend I look at where the salary packages are similar or at least close to what I would be getting in the UAE?
     
  8. TeacherMan19

    TeacherMan19 Occasional commenter

    There are countries where the salaries can still offer opportunity for saving. The ME can pay well, but has a higher cost of living for regular items because they don't make anything (except oil). So your weekly shop might be a lot more expensive compared to somewhere that offers a reasonable salary but the shopping might be peanuts.

    Use the website Numbeo (I think it's called as a way of comparing regular items prices in different cities/countries.
     
  9. towncryer

    towncryer Lead commenter

    It would be just so much easier to get married for the purposes of ease of work. Can you not just have a quickie wedding a register office and save for a bigger do later (if that's the reason you're waiting) I know couples who have married just for ease of getting a job in Middle East countries...and as you say that you are hoping to anyway...why not.I think it will be very difficult to secure a job if you haven;t been married at all to the father of your child as they just don't recognise this.
     
  10. february31st

    february31st Established commenter

    I do know couples who have a "quicki" marriage to work in the ME end up having a faster divorce. (same is true for China)

    If your relationship is not settled in the UK then the extra strains of moving abroad can soon rip you apart, too much forbidden fruit on the trees.
     
  11. the hippo

    the hippo Lead commenter Community helper

    It used to be the case that the UAE was a great place to save money, sdvuba, but these days the salaries are not so high and the cost of living has gone up. Lots of schools in the UAE are trying to cut back on the benefits that they offered to their teachers in the past. Going anywhere for only two years might not be a good idea, as the set-up costs of moving your life (and your child's life) to another country could be more than you think. If you only want to go for two years, then why bother going at all?

    If you are not married to your child's husband, then I would agree with towncryer that perhaps the UAE is not the best place to start your international teaching career. I am not trying to create a problem where there isn't one, but I do think that it would be wise to consider all of your options. Sometimes the UAE appears to be a very modern, liberal, westernized and relaxed place, but appearances are sometimes only skin-deep.

    When I was in China, I knew several couples whose marriages fell apart. Yes, on the whole I would agree with old febbers that lots of pretty Chinese ladies would like to have a foreign hubby, even if he is already married to someone else.

    I am sorry if all of this seems rather negative. I will send you one of those TES Conversation things, sdvuba.
     
  12. sdvuba

    sdvuba New commenter

    Unfortunately I cannot have a quickie marriage as our traditional values do not allow such. There's an entire process that goes into marrying someone from my tradition - I'm from South Africa btw
     
  13. sdvuba

    sdvuba New commenter

    Thank you Mr Hippo for your advice. I have thought about it what it would cost me, whether it would be worth it to relocate to another country and it is something that I see as doable even if its for a short period of time. The reason why I'm going there for 2 years is to save money so that I can invest it back home. My boyfriend has had his experience of working overseas and he prefers our home country. He is supportive of me going to work overseas as he understands that I would like to have that experience as well.

    One of the things I am worried about going to the UAE is that cost of living can be quite high and like others have mentioned it is not the best place to move with my child. I haven't really explored other options as I have been so set in moving to the UAE. If you have any other countries to suggest please do.
     
  14. february31st

    february31st Established commenter

    But your traditional values allow you to have children outside of marriage?
     
  15. hankay

    hankay Occasional commenter

    I was wondering this myself.
     
    CoconutLatte likes this.
  16. hankay

    hankay Occasional commenter

    But what is it about the UAE that you're so drawn to?

    If you want to move abroad, it should be somewhere that you have always dreamed of going and already take an active interest in their landscapes, culture, food, politics, etc. I don't think you should pursue a life and career abroad as a result of pulling a country out of a hat, as suggested by anonymous forum users. /shrug
     
  17. sdvuba

    sdvuba New commenter

    Of course it doesn't. If you have a child outside of marriage the father of the child must pay damages to the mother of the child's family for impregnating her. Damages can either be in cows or cash depending what the family wants. Tradition doesn't allow you to have children outside of marriage as there will be consequences as I have mentioned.
     
    missmissmiss likes this.
  18. sdvuba

    sdvuba New commenter

    I would like to move to the UAE because I have heard that it is a great country from people that have visited it there. It would also be a nice change and experience from my current country. I am researching what living in the UAE would be like and it seems like a great place. I don't mind suggestions because I would at least research the country and see whether I like it as well. I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
     
  19. RachieC

    RachieC New commenter

    I’ve been in the UAE for 10 years+, have 2 children and a husband. Opportunities for saving have decreased as costs have gone up but benefit packages not as lucrative. We’re not saving much, if anything at the moment and we’re 2 full timer workers with some good benefits. We’ve had home-help since I went back to work and we could not manage without it. As a single mum, providing you have the necessary documents to take you child, you will find it hard. You’d need full time care for your child. Nurseries are expensive, more than school fees in some cases, so you need to budget for that. They’ve been closed since March due to Covid and no guarantee of them staying open. Opening hours can also be restrictive. What will you do if your child is ill? Schools don’t like staff taking time off to care for kids. Employing home help would probably be cheaper as school hours can be long but then you’d need space to accommodate them or pay for their accommodation.
     
  20. february31st

    february31st Established commenter

    The only real way to make a good money savings on the international circuit today is as a married couple, no kids, where you can bank at least one wage.

    The days are long gone when a real international School in the ME would cough up 4000GBP tax free plus accommodation for a basic teacher with qts and a handful of years experience.
     

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