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Mother's Day

Discussion in 'Personal' started by delmamerchant, Mar 25, 2017.

  1. FormosaRed

    FormosaRed Occasional commenter

    I have been wondering if your day got any better, Ork,.. I hope so. My kids didn't get me anything either because I think I've brought them up to be as cynical as me when it comes to companies exploiting people for profit. We should all be honouring eachother every day, all year round, rather than make a big show on one day. However, I did notice that my local Tesco had rather over ordered on the flowers front and I calculated they'd all be half price by closing time today. I quite fancy a massive bunch of lilies for £1.50. Not a bit of it, I rocked up, confidently, ready to make my floral killing, half an hour before closing. All still full price and tonnes of bouquets and various arrangements still left Good luck with selling those on Monday morning.....

    My big lily vase has gone back in the cupboard.
     
  2. JosieWhitehead

    JosieWhitehead Star commenter

    Oh - wonderful!!! What a wonderful idea, to celebrate the mother you had or have, whether she be alive or dead. My daughter doesn't celebrate this fact, but I appreciate all my mother did for me. You are right about the Mother church. I grew up in West Hagley, Worcs, and we had our main church at the bottom of the hill, but the mother church was in the grounds of Hagley Hall, the home of Lord Cobham and family, cousin to the Queen. All the special events happened in this church, and we were given little bunches of violets for our mothers from the grounds of Hagley Hall when we went to the Mother Church on Mothering Sunday. It is interesting to learn about the origins of Mothering Sunday from such books as Lark Rise to Candleford.
     
  3. red_observer

    red_observer Star commenter

    Today's not been a good day for mothers who have lost a son or daughter. Sorry to put the dampener on it but it's a fact.
     
    Lara mfl 05 and slingshotsally like this.
  4. red_observer

    red_observer Star commenter

    I hate the way days are being invented for commercial reasons. Think of the mothers losing their kids in Yemen and Syria... it's all ******
     
  5. racroesus

    racroesus Star commenter

    I hope for much but expect to get as much as I got on St Valentine's Day.
     
  6. grumpydogwoman

    grumpydogwoman Star commenter

    My daughter (elder of two) came for lunch and did the washing up. Despite me telling her not to! Result!

    Also offered to part-pay towards our joint hols in France.

    Not bad.

    But she'd have done that anyway.


    I still can't buy into the MD hype and commercialism.
     
    Lara mfl 05 and JosieWhitehead like this.
  7. inky

    inky Lead commenter

    Like I said, poignant. In the early years, sad though that was, it served to remind me that I was, after all, still a mother. A sweet colleague used to give me a card every year. It must have taken courage to do that, bless her.

    You don't make bad things go away by brushing them under the carpet.
     
    sabrinakat and Lara mfl 05 like this.
  8. Doitforfree

    Doitforfree Star commenter

    For probably the first time ever all four of my children managed one or more of cards, presents, phone calls and nice gestures. My husband must have worked really hard on them!
     
    Lara mfl 05 likes this.
  9. coffeekid

    coffeekid Star commenter

    My mother was a terrible mother (TERRIBLE) yet I still feel pressure to buy the card, do the thing. Not this year, I was too caught up with other events, but I feel guilty even though she doesn't actually deserve all the Mothers Day shenanigans. No doubt she'll complain about me to all the relatives, who will take it in like soup and mutter about how ungrateful I am...
     
  10. emilystrange

    emilystrange Star commenter

    i exchanged pleasantaries on FB with Mummy Strange, as our usual thing is to ring in the evening. Either my bruv has turned chatty or she's not put it back on the hook properly.
     
    Lara mfl 05 likes this.
  11. Grandsire

    Grandsire Senior commenter

    My mum has just told me she's had 'the perfect day'! I had made a pretty card and a small flower brooch for her, and kept the day clear so we could go out. We went for a long walk in the woods and fields in the area where she grew up, chattering non-stop the whole time. After, we cooked a lovely lunch with purple sprouting and rhubarb from the garden - so much nicer than eating out. Having lost my dad recently, we're very much aware of the simple pleasure in just being together, and sharing memories.
     
  12. minnie me

    minnie me Star commenter

    Blimey - that totally crass Nationwide ad ( during Homeland) and the Mother's Day poem !!!!!! If I had money in there I would be withdrawing pronto
     
  13. Duke of York

    Duke of York Star commenter

    This is mostly what Mother's day has ever meant to me. When Father's Day comes round, I'll think about my father and not fret if my daughters overlooked it for me.

    It's a choice rather than an obligation. I live a secular life and wouldn't dream of attending church to obey its rituals or calendar, but I'm thankful for the fact its rituals have had spin-offs that enhance everyone's lives.

    Yet there's something else to reflect on. Each of us survived childhood somewhere between neglect and over-bearing parental control. Some people have better parenting skills than others, but it's a difficult thing to learn. Just as babies are thrown into the world without a 100% chance of survival, so do mothers suddenly find themselves having to sink or swim.

    No matter what the books and grandparents have to tell you, most of the time you're on your own, trying to decide what to do for the best.

    Whilst we reflect on how wonderful our own mothers were, I think we should spare a thought for those who couldn't or can't hack the additional stress of children coming into their stressful lives.

    It's a real sod, ain't it? For every woman whose desperate to become a mother, there's another who is hating the prospect.

    My own mother was born at a difficult time in world history. Her father was injured in WW1 and as a consequence, her parents were unable to look after her, so she was sent to live with an aunt who was a religious nutter who treated her as a slave and beat her more on Sundays after the sermon.

    There is no definitive handbook to tell parents how they should raise their children and for that we should thank our lucky stars, because had there been one, it will almost certainly have been written by someone with a bizarre agenda and have a religious bias.

    Let's just be thankful we survived childhood and think of those who helped us do it. We read in the news frequently of those who were subjected to a tough life by their parents and never made it past the first few years.

    Most of us don't realise how lucky we've been.
     
    sabrinakat likes this.
  14. Calpurnia99

    Calpurnia99 Star commenter

    Could there be a national GET OVER IT day?
    You've been given two perfectly good reasons why the day exists. If you wish to deplore the end of the Church of England as a major commercial and cultural factor, start another thread.
    I had a lovely day, thank you.
     
  15. Oscillatingass

    Oscillatingass Star commenter

    Great post.:)
     
  16. JosieWhitehead

    JosieWhitehead Star commenter

    I cannot imagine such a kind son or daughter. I hope your mother appreciates your kind thoughts. I'm sure she does.
     
  17. JosieWhitehead

    JosieWhitehead Star commenter

    To come to what Duke of York said: If you have the perfect mother or daughter or son, then you are lucky. Inborn feelings of love in motherhood or childhood has nothing to do with the Christian religion which teaches you to love each other. If we were born with inherent feelings of love towards each other, we wouldn't need to have people teach us to do so, or for any form of religion to teach us this. But - and just listen to the news - we are not born with the natural feelings of love towards others, it is obvious. It is one of the failings of being human I'm afraid - but showing love and concern for others that we meet in life, whether they are mothers, children, neighbours or the poor lonely man or woman living in isolation from any family who you know of, is worth developing and working at. It is called friendship and caring and this should be celebrated.
     
    sabrinakat and grumpydogwoman like this.
  18. slingshotsally

    slingshotsally Star commenter

    There is - it's the day AFTER Mothers' Day.

    At least it's over now. ;)
     
    Calpurnia99 and Lara mfl 05 like this.
  19. grumpydogwoman

    grumpydogwoman Star commenter

    This. Absolutely. The worst of it is that people won't be honest. They mouth the platitudes. "I love you." They know it's expected. But they don't show it. They don't live it. That's why I'm very sceptical about these "Days". Don't think a card and some flowers tells me you love me. Am I that shallow? I don't want or need your filial piety. If I have done wrong by you and you hate me then don't pretend otherwise. It's not good for me and it's not good for you.

    Doing the washing-up and messaging me later was worth a lot more.
     
  20. HelenREMfan

    HelenREMfan Star commenter

    Well after brooding over the "cuckoo" for most of the day I had a brain (ish) wave and put a post on FB where I knew exactly what I meant by it..... and it might just have resonated with the awful girl. I put a post about mothers AND mothers-in-law......

    Quote Tis mother's day here in the uk but sadly my mum is no longer with us, neither is my ex mother in law - so no card for me to send this year but lovely ladies to remember. All daughters in law should remember their mothers in law......so often a very supportive and helpful member of the family."

    It made me feel a little better anyway...if I am really lucky she will "unfriend me"......
     

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