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Miscarriage - when to start trying again?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy' started by mermy, Aug 11, 2010.

  1. mermy

    mermy Occasional commenter

    Well, as you mention, the news say that it is best to try straight away again. I have heard of a few who straight got pregnant again, so I'd say go for it.
  2. Sorry to hear about your miscarriage. My feeling is that if your body is ready to conceive again then you will be able to...I think there is always a risk with these things so as difficult as it can be you just need to keep trying, relax and trust that it will happen. If you were to have another MC then you would be entitled to a check-up to see if everything is ok. Good luck with it all.
  3. I agree. I didn't wait and I feel so much better / comfortable / positive about it this time, I really do. If it's an early mc and complete and you get negative tests immediatly afterwards then as I understand it there's no reason why you shouldn't ovulate again within your normal time.
  4. Hello AnnAngel,
    Your thread stood out to me today as I've miscarried in the night. I was wondering the same thing although we are both upset and may need a rest first. Please let me know what you plan to do -if you don't mind sharing. Did the midwife tell you how quickly you might get your periods back?
    Lots of best wishes to you and your partner. I know how sad it feels x
  5. Hello Ladymarm,
    So sorry to hear that you are also going through this. I had an erpc operation and the doctor said i should expect my period to return 4-6 weeks after. It's been 3 weeks and nothing yet.
    Ive been a bit emotional last night and again today......surprised me as i thought i was doing ok. I've decided to wait until after my first period now because although i don't want to hang around i now feel this is what's right for me.
    Take time to recover physically.......i was surprised how it knocked me physically.
    Best wishes to you and your partner as well. Thinking of you.
  6. Cupsy

    Cupsy New commenter

    So sorry to hear your news.
    I had a "missed miscarriage" a few years ago, went for the 12 week scan to be told that they could not find a heartbeat. At the time it felt like the end of our world. Looking back the only thing that kept me focussed was wanting to try again for another baby.
    Like you I had conflicting advice, however my own doctor said to wait until I had had a period then it was ok to start trying. We followed this advice and were so fortunate as I got pregnant straight away. I dont think I relaxed the whole time during the pregnancy though, I was terrified that something would go wrong again. It didnt and had a beautiful daughter.
    Went on to have another child, again with no problems, though we have never forgotten our first angel.
    Whatever you decide to do I wish you all the best for the future.

  7. Thanks Cupsy for your message, it helped me to read it too.
    Ann Angel thnaks for replying. I feel very similar. Physically bruised from cramping. Is an erpc where they investigate inside to check if you've fully miscarried? Really sorry for asking you a graphic question. How did they dcide to do this?
    If you don't want to answer I do understand that I'm being very personal- sorry.
  8. Paradoxicalgirly

    Paradoxicalgirly New commenter

    Hi, sorry to hear of your loss. With my first miscarriage we were planning on waiting (although we were told we could try again straightaway) - but accidentally fell pregnant 10 weeks later. I was very ill with my first miscarriage, which is why we decided to wait.
    I lost the second pregnancy too - and I now have sacro-iliac joint dysfunction as a result of having two first trimesters so close together.
    I had tests following the second miscarriage, so had to wait a few months for the all clear from them.
    With my third miscarriage, we decided to try straightaway. Mainly because I'd been in no pain and lost hardly any blood.
    I was told by the consultants two years ago that it was dated advice to tell you to wait.
    But, ultimately, you have to do what you feel is best for you.

    Best wishes xxx
  9. An erpc is an operation where they remove the "remained products of conception"......such an awful way to put it.
    I was given the choice of:
    1) waiting for it to happen naturally
    2)taking tablets - this still meant going into hospital and i didn't like the thought of waiting to miscarry there.
    3) operation
    For me the operation was the best choice as it meant the bleeding etc was over more quickly. I couldn't face waiting it out or for any of it to go on any longer. I guess it's different for everyone and you just have to do what's right for you.
    How you doing today? Big hug
    Thanks everyone
  10. Do you mind me asking whats sacro-iliac joint dysfunction?
    Im so sorry you've had to go through this three times. X
  11. Sorry to hear about your loss. I had a miscarrage at the end of June and I went for the second option. I asked when I could start trying again and the doc said to wait until the bleeding stopped (2 weeks) and then start trying after my next period. I'm now at that point!!
    Hope it all works out for you soon x
  12. *miscarriage
  13. Paradoxicalgirly

    Paradoxicalgirly New commenter

    Sacro-iliac joint dysfunction - basically your pelvis kind of separates (not sure that's the best term to describe it!!) a lot in the first trimester, more than any other time in pregnancy until you're giving birth. My pelvis kind of didn't go back again properly and so the second pregnancy just compounded it. I hadn't been in pain with the first pregnancy, but was in agony with the second.
    I also then found that when my period came I'd also be in pain - the physio told me that your pelvis moves in a similar way to pregnancy when you're on your period.
    I've been doing Pilates regularly, and it really helps - so I wasn't in as much pain with the third pregnancy.
  14. I'm so glad I found this thread today, I came onto this board to see if there were any similar threads as it happened, just didn't expect there to be a current one.
    Firstly, sorry to the OP and others in the same situation. I also had a missed miscarriage at end of June, only the sac was still there and I had the tablets to remove it which unfortunately failed so I had the surgery, which the Dr thought went fine. The surgery was on 7 July, 5 and a half weeks ago.
    They told me to wait for 1 period before trying again. I had heard that lots of women don't ovulate the month after a mc and that if you do it's hard to know when so I haven't used my CBFM to avoid wasting the expensive sticks, and so I have no idea if I've ov'd or not, or when my period will arrive. Soon I hope, otherwise I'll start worrying I've got Asherman's syndrome....
    It's lovely to hear the success stories of women who get pg soon after a mc, so thanks people whove posted those.
    Good luck to all of you, take care,Sarahx
  15. I had a blighted ovum too Sarah - hope you're ok x
  16. Hi, just wanted to share my story. Hopefully it will give some hope to people trying after a miscarriage. We had been trying for ages, probably a couple of years of not being very careful and 6-12 months of concerted effort. I fell pregnant last October and miscarried at about 6 weeks at the end of November. We were obviously distraught but also hopeful as we had not known whether we could even conceive, there were problems on both sides.
    I was told to wait one cycle so we had a boozy and relaxing Christmas, my period was on time and finished around boxing day. We went away for a couple of days at New Year - again with lots of alcohol, which I'd previously been avoiding - and I fell pregnant a few days after, at only day 8 or 9 of my cycle. I am now 33 weeks pregnant.
    Clearly I'm not advocating lots of booze, but I genuinely think that the fact we were so relaxed, and had absolutely no expectations of it happening again so quickly, helped. We were just concentrating on making the best of what we had, enjoying life, enjoying each other and so on. I also think that the fact we had been trying for so long with no result and then got pregnant twice in quick succession, must mean that the miscarriage had something to do with it.
    I have since heard lots of people saying similar things happened to them, maybe it does something to your hormones which means you are more fertile immediately afterwards.
    Good luck with whatever you decide.
  17. Just to echo Wormburger - I could have written that! I put my 2nd pregnancy down to a boozy, relaxed Christmas after a MMC at 11 weeks in November. I had one period (came early Jan after ERPC in late Nov) and was pregnant again in that cycle. We weren't concentrating on getting PG again as MMC hit us both hard, and I had plans to take up many hobbies in the new year! I'm coming up to 32 weeks now with no complications after getting PG again quickly after ERPC.
    Having a miscarriage is hard physically and emotionally so take as much time as you need. It's been hard work being PG again in terms of being a bit paranoid, but that would happen whenever it had happened. I have got my fingers crossed for everyone who has shared their stories. Good luck x x x
  18. Para, wormburger and leeds- thanks for sharing your experiences with us.
    Hope you are ok AnnAngel- and Sarah too. I'm feeling a lot better but have noticed I'm very easily brought to tears and pretty clingy with my OH which is not like me normally. Have to go into hospital tomorrow and dreading it. i know it sounds horrible but I know I'll be waiting for the scan with lots of pregnant ladies and i just hope none of them asks me anything like when I'm due as I won't handle it very well.
  19. Ladymarm i was just the same.....clingy to OH and still am a bit tearful but it is getting better, now it just seems to be the odd day rather than most.
    I will be thinking of you tomorrow - from my experience everyone in that room is nervous as noone knows for sure everything is ok so noone spoke when i was there.....just lots of nervous looks. I know exactly how you're feeling tho and hopefully it will be over quickly.
    P.S It's so strange to be willing my period to come as while TTC i was hoping not to get it.
    Take care of yourself xxx
  20. Hi

    I had a mmc at 12 weeks in June. I was told by hospital to go home and decided what i wanted to do. I have to say they hospital staff where amazing and I decided to have the medical management, which for me was no where near as bad as what i had read about online. i was so scared.
    So about six weeks later i have had the heaviest period which iis ont the norm for me.

    my husband and i have talked about trying again as maybe it is the only thing that will fill the hole. Most of my days are good but then i too have the odd bad few moments. The wierd thing is when the rest of the world feels the need to tell you that you can try again and have another baby. I have to work very hard to smile gracefully at their comments. Why now do people think they can pry into your sex life?
    So i has been nice to hear that i am not the only one who had a mmc rather than feeling like the whole world is pregnant.
    take care all xx


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