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Little gestures

Discussion in 'Personal' started by anon3372, May 2, 2012.

  1. I rang an acquaintance tonight, who I know from our sport's club, as we had talked a while back about some business information her husband could provide me with.
    Turns out she has had a really hard few months, lots of illnesses within the family with elderly relatives and her left to deal with it all (you know, the sibling problem) and now also her son has started having fits, and collapsed whilst rowing at the weekend and the doctors can't work out why.
    So I never got round to asking about the biz information, but suggested if she needed an hour's time out to catch her breath at any time, to give me a ring and we could go for coffee.
    She burst into tears! And said that in all the months, nobody had offered her that.
    I was a bit taken aback, firstly that her friends and family seem to have left her in the lurch, but most of all about how a simple suggestion of coffee can mean so much to somebody.
    We should really make these gestures more often, is what I have decided. It can make the world of difference to somebody.

     
  2. I rang an acquaintance tonight, who I know from our sport's club, as we had talked a while back about some business information her husband could provide me with.
    Turns out she has had a really hard few months, lots of illnesses within the family with elderly relatives and her left to deal with it all (you know, the sibling problem) and now also her son has started having fits, and collapsed whilst rowing at the weekend and the doctors can't work out why.
    So I never got round to asking about the biz information, but suggested if she needed an hour's time out to catch her breath at any time, to give me a ring and we could go for coffee.
    She burst into tears! And said that in all the months, nobody had offered her that.
    I was a bit taken aback, firstly that her friends and family seem to have left her in the lurch, but most of all about how a simple suggestion of coffee can mean so much to somebody.
    We should really make these gestures more often, is what I have decided. It can make the world of difference to somebody.

     
  3. Lara mfl 05

    Lara mfl 05 Star commenter

    Couldn't agree more CQ.
    I often explain to my husband that, especially with women (even more so with emotional ones) we have a great need to talk. Just to talk, voice concerns, think out loud etc. We just want a 'listening ear'. we <u>do not </u>want ( as most men seem to think) a solution necessarily but an opportunity to sort things out ourselves by the process.
    So keep listening.
     
  4. Sorrim

    Sorrim Occasional commenter

    I couldn't have put it better myself Lara. Very true. Sorrim x
     
  5. Dragonlady30

    Dragonlady30 Star commenter

    This is SO true! No wonder guys say they can't understand women-they just don't listen to us!! [​IMG]
    The little acts of kindness, sometimes from strangers can restore faith in human kind!
     
  6. Or maybe we females don't communicate with them properly. I don't want to turn this into a gender debate.
    This was a female to female discussion, but obviously even her female friends had not thought to ask her out for coffee, just to have some time off from her problems. And maybe she had not suggested it herself, and they were waiting for her to say something...I don't know.
    But anyway, I think we should stretch out the hand and offer. An hour drinking coffee and listening, or talking about something completely different as a diversion, is not a major sacrifice, but for the person having a bad time, it can be a huge relief.

     
  7. Lara mfl 05

    Lara mfl 05 Star commenter

    It was not my intention to make this into a gender discussion. I was just trying to point out that as women, we really appreciate time to talk and have someone just listen to us without attempting to 'solve the problem'.
    As you CQ say an invite to coffee is sometimes all one needs to lift one when feeling down.
     
  8. I know [​IMG]
    Sometimes just sitting and drinking coffee and NOT talking about the problems can help, too.
     
  9. dozymare1957

    dozymare1957 Occasional commenter

    Hence, we post here in the hopes that someone will listen and support us
     
  10. And then get a rollicking [​IMG]
     
  11. If you want to read a lot of stories about such gestures, read this thread from Mumsnet
    http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/1391767-Random-Act-of-Kindness-to-balance-all-the-ranty-threads-tell-me-of-a-random-act-of-kindness-that-you-have-never-forgotten

    Sorry, I don't know how to do links properly.

     
  12. awww, there were some lovely ones on there (I didn't realise mumsnet did nice threads *ducks*)

     

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