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Life after . . .

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by bob79, May 2, 2016.

  1. bob79

    bob79 Occasional commenter

    I am at a really low ebb and I wondered if any of you could offer support/advice - it would be most appreciated.

    [This comment/image/section has been removed to preserve poster anonymity]

    I know this excuse is a way of getting rid of me without a fuss - I feel so stupid for not involving my union in my only 'informal' meeting. I have negotiated my reference, I will receive a copy and I have discussed what will be put in it; I have requested and received copies all of my lesson observation forms. The Head has fallen over themselves to accommodate me, even telling me they are sad to see me go - honestly you could not make it up. I suppose what I am asking is have any of you been through this situation? Can you recover from it? Am I alone? Have I forgot to do anything else? I feel like I cannot go on at times. On the outside I am acting like nothing has happened, but inside I feel humiliated and ashamed. Previously I had an exemplary work record/results etc and I held a low-tier management position, now I feel like I will look awful on paper and nobody will touch me. I have always taken such pride in my work and I took this job because it was a step forward and now it feels like a huge mistake.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 3, 2016
  2. Calamity54321

    Calamity54321 New commenter

    I think it's awful that the Head has rolled over for these parents. Now they've seen that they can successfully get rid of teachers with those tactics, they'll keep on with it and demand more and more from the school. Do you have any idea what the accusations were?
  3. betsyb1

    betsyb1 New commenter

    I really would contact your union. You absolutely have the right to know what the basis of these complaints are. Have you been told? If they are completely fabricated, then there could be grounds for legal action and your union could advise you on this. This is a horrible situation for you, but you can at least move on and go to a school that appreciates you. This one doesn't deserve you. Hold your head high and try to stay strong. I wish you all the best .
  4. grumpydogwoman

    grumpydogwoman Star commenter

    OK, you won't look bad. You've negotiated your reference. It was bad luck. You have no idea what went on. It was very unlikely to have been about you. I think you were collateral damage from something else going on.

    The school is very embarrassed about it and feels guilty (hence the cold shoulder - a colleague feeling very ashamed).

    Goodness only knows what went on. I would speak to the union. Definitely. Often I would advise slugging it out but it sounds as if you would leave with good references so maybe it's (another) fresh start for you.

    Union advice takes precedence over what we say because we don't have the full picture but all is not lost. May 2017 and you could be happy and fulfilled. You really could.
    ValentinoRossi and pepper5 like this.
  5. pepper5

    pepper5 Star commenter

    You need help and support, so call your union as they will be able to advise you on your !legal rights as far as being told what the complaints were. You also need someone to talk to about the upset you have suffered because of these false allegations. See if your union provides any support for this, but also ring the Teacher Support Network.

    I agree with GDW: there was something else maybe going on. You happened to get caught up in it.

    If the Head can't stand up to the parents and you have done nothing wrong, then you are best out of there and will find a better job.

    You can't look back in the rear view mirror; you took this job, if didn't work out for reasons beyond your control. You definitely are not a failure, so you will be able go recover from this as G WD writes that you can be happy and fulfilled, but you must take your union's advice.
  6. bob79

    bob79 Occasional commenter

    Thank you all. I cannot go into details but I did 'stumble' onto something, upon reflection I was probably too vocal. Either way, it's too late now. I did seek Union advice and my regional rep has supported me via telephone. [This comment/image/section has been removed to preserve poster anonymity] they have already told me the school has form and its own rules, so they were reluctant to get involved. I hope I can reflect on it soon, I'm applying for posts but I do feel so low in confidence. Your posts have been very helpful, thank you.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 3, 2016
  7. bob79

    bob79 Occasional commenter

    No, the advice given contradicted my experience with the group I taught. I have since learnt the school responds to any parent concern by pretty much doing what the parent wants.

    [This comment/image/section has been removed to preserve poster anonymity]
    Last edited by a moderator: May 3, 2016
  8. TheoGriff

    TheoGriff Star commenter


    I am sorry that you have had such an upsetting time. However, it is not a disaster, and for reasons for leaving on any form you can honestly say End of contract.

    That's good!

    You still have that.

    No, you won't look bad.

    I feel that you have in fact already gone into too many, so have edited your posts above as you can see.

    Read again all the supportive posts above. This should give you the impetus to start applying for jobs.

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    Get ready for the application season!

    Best wishes

  9. bob79

    bob79 Occasional commenter

    Thank you all, feel a bit brighter - I really am grateful for all of your advice.

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