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Irritating Restaurant Menu Terms

Discussion in 'Cookery' started by nick909, May 2, 2011.

  1. nick909

    nick909 Star commenter

    Do they drive anyone else insane?
    "A succulent supreme of corn-fed chicken, gently enrobed in an smooth emulsion of mushroom and cream, nestled on a bed of riz vapeur."
    So...chicken in a mushroom sauce with rice?
    Okay so I made that one up, but we've all seen something similar, haven't we?
    The French pretensions aside (if the food isn't explicitly French, please don't use French terms), the word nestled makes me feel physically sick if I think about it too much.
    Pan-fried. How else might you fry a steak, then? Does saying pan-fried make it healthier? No.
    Oven-roasted. Ditto. I wouldn't have expected you to have used a cat or a bucket, say. In fact, whilst we're here roast is a perfectly adequate adjective to describe food cooked in such a manner, so say something is roasted in meaningless and sounds daft.
    Home-made. If I wanted a home-made pie, I'd have stayed at home. I'm paying you to cook one in your restaurant. I'd like a restaurant-made pie please.

    And there are plenty of others...

    Or is this just me?!
  2. rosievoice

    rosievoice Star commenter

    Tuna <u>FISH</u> what is that about? Do we also need to be told if a dish is chicken <u>BIRD</u>?
    Pan-fried (what other way is there?)
    Home-made (somewhere in the EU)

  3. well there is deep fried.
  4. Jaxx

    Completely off topic

    I saw a birth anouncement a couple of years ago and the child was called Jaxx - I'm just wondering what Jaxx will pick as a user name when he is old enough.
  5. rosievoice

    rosievoice Star commenter

    What do you deep fry in, then?
  6. nick909

    nick909 Star commenter

    YES! Hate them. Lots of people are too posh to eat gravy, it seems.
    Jus is what you drink at breakfast time in France.
    Napped is what I like to have done in the afternoon after a heavy lunch. Especially if it's drizzled outside.
    I'd ideally prefer people to be enrobed whilst eating in my house, but whatever tickles your fancy.
    Emulsion - buy it from Homebase in massive tins
    And, I've never had a foam that hasn't tasted precisely of nothing, so I don't see the point either.
  7. I deep fry in a deep fat fryer, not in a pan [​IMG]
    There is a difference.
    I agree with most of the rest, though.

  8. rosievoice

    rosievoice Star commenter

    You're posh! I deep-fry in a wok. All things considered, frying is simply a cooking technique involving varying depths of oil or fat in a pan over a heat source. Bacon requires only a little fat, so can be sizzled in a shallow pan. Chips need to be immersed in oil so need to be cooked in a deeper pan. Shallow, deep, it's all frying in a pan, methinks.
  9. nick909

    nick909 Star commenter

    Just perusing the menu of a restaurant in Horsham, which admittedly looks good (although they've put me off by charging for a pre-starter!!!), and came across this beauty...
    Lamb Neck Variation
    Err..,is it just me or does this cound like a vetinary medical procedure?
    It gets better on the description:
    Lamb and mint crumble, Lamb strudel, Lamb lollypop
    So...trying to be clever by making meat sound like pudding...but really just lamb with a few breadcrumbs in it; a pasty and what I can only assume is a tiny kebab.


  10. egyptgirl

    egyptgirl Senior commenter

    Saw this on a menu last summer and I made Mr EG order it to see what it was - basically lamb cooked 3 different ways (why not just cook it one way and make it stunning? and why do we need to eat half a plate of meat when eating out?) but it was pan fried quickly (bad idea - lamb neck needs a long slow cook), 'slow' cooked (not slow enough as it was still raw in the middle) and minced and formed into a sausage (worst idea I've ever heard).
    As you can probably guess, it was all disgusting. And we didn't pay. [​IMG]

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