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Imprisoned by my own values?!

Discussion in 'Personal' started by nosandals, Dec 13, 2009.

  1. That's a lovely idea. Mr N isn't a very spiritual or metaphorical type. He is very happy with his life. He likes his sport and a pint. He would be deeply suspicious if I started talking about abstract stuff like that, although I appreciate what you mean, Eureka. That's kinda where the gap is between us, and why we're not completely compatible.
    He will just agree, then carry on as usual. I have taken him as far as he wants to go on this 'journey' and he aint gonna move any further. 15 ish years have taught me our limits!
  2. Eureka!

    Eureka! Lead commenter

    !5 years have taught you *his* limits surely. If these limits are not shared, then going beyond them is fair game, surely?
  3. Well, this is an old and long thread to resurrect. Thought I'd add a postscript for anyone who remembers...
    I'm now divorced.
  4. lurk_much

    lurk_much Occasional commenter

    Can't say I am surprised
    I think congratulations may be in order?
  5. Thank you, yes. x
  6. Once I'd got over the total shock of having done something for myself, I realised how much happier I am and at least one of my children is now. It's been a difficult time, but I did the right thing. Eventually.
  7. hi nosandals...at least one of your children is? How is your other child? I sometimes think like you did about my own marriage. It must have taken courage to get out. Did you marriage affect your children badly? Mine are young but Im not really miserable all the time just somethimes I think 'this should be better' etc.
  8. clear_air

    clear_air New commenter

    Did you evergo to any of those gigs? They looked great, I hope you did! (and I hope your other child is happier with the new family situation soon too)
  9. becky70

    becky70 Occasional commenter

    Glad you are much happier - best wishes for the future.
  10. Congratulations.
    I found the process painful at the time, but I am so much happier and stronger years later, being divorced.
    My ex - is not an a.rsehole.
    But the things that were wrong are even wronger 9 years on.
    The respect is still there. Sometimes.
    But no love.
    I found that the hardest - to deal with the love dying, when you have worked your a.rse off for the kids to keep it going. But you cannot force love. Not once it was betrayed.
    What a lot of waffle.
    Forget it all - celebrate! Congratulations!
  11. Hi nosandals, I used to be deleted570. I often wondered what happened with you and your OH and although I'm sorry things didn't work out, I'm glad that you're okay.
  12. wordsworth

    wordsworth Senior commenter

    I also read all this thread, not realising it had started a year or so back. Well done nosandals - it is v hard indeed to initiate divorce [​IMG] best wishes for you and the children
  13. Thank you [​IMG]
    Now I'm looking back on my time married, I've realised how very fast that time went. Life is too short as it is. The last 10 years have been lost and that's a long time to be unhappy. Hope anyone else in similar circumstances gets out before it's too late.

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