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I just can't go back to work

Discussion in 'Personal' started by cosmos, Jan 17, 2011.

  1. I am due back at work tomorrow having been off for 10 weeks after hysterectomy and I just can't face it. The time off has made me realise that there is so much more to life than work. My college is such an unhappy place as well, stress, bullying management and this year in particular, students from hell.
    Mr C isn't being very sympathetic, he thinks I should work at least until I'm 60 but we really don't need my income ( I know we're fortunate); would it be too horrendous to chuck it all in at the age of 58? The other thing is how long do I have to be back before I could reasonably hand in my notice? A month?
    I used to love my job but the nature of it has changed so much that it isn't the job I had and loved. I won't be able to find another teaching job - very few exist in my area so it would be full retirement.
    Advice or just emotional stroking would be appreciated.
     
  2. IMO,if you can handle it financially stop now. Life is too short. Why does Mr C think you should keep working? Is his job perhaps at risk and he's worried about the money? It would be as well to be sure of his reasoning before you finally decide in case it causes issues.Hope you are feeling well. [​IMG]
     
  3. Shifter

    Shifter New commenter

    You Should be entitled to a phased return to work. Speak to HR and take along your H&S rep.
    Yes, I packed it all in at 58 for the same reasons as you described, (less the hysterectomy) my health and well being is more important that ungrateful, feckless students.
     
  4. I agree with Milly Molly, life is too short and it's just not worth it...if you can afford it go for it!
    To appease your partner and make it less of a shock to your system could you do a phased retirement, cutting down your days etc
    Good luck and enjoy whatever you decide to do
     
  5. bbibbler

    bbibbler New commenter

    Go back for a few days, then get yourself signed off again and contact your union.

    It is the system that has messed you up, play the system and line your pocket.
     
  6. I do have a reduced timetable in place - brilliant HR person fought for that - but even so, the thought of returning to unhappy colleagues and horrid students is more than I can bear at the moment. Perhaps it won't be too bad, maybe the reality will be better than the thoughts.
    Mr C has an odd attitude to money and I think is worried at the idea of supporting me although he won't discuss it with me - I have worked so hard over the years to bring money into the family but the children are grown and long gone and I feel I deserve this time now. Because of the work I did before teaching I'll have no pension other than state when I'm 60 so it's not as if I am compromising that.
    oh dear, I'm full of self pity and feel quite tearful today - sorry.
     
  7. littlemissraw

    littlemissraw Occasional commenter

    Who says your income has to be at your current place of work? My mum took early retirement and now does 2 days a week in an office, she likes the people she works with and goes in more for the social aspect than the pay (although it something).
    Don't waste your life being miserable xx
     
  8. Poor you Cosmos.
    No advice, but lots of sympathy. Teaching is such a draining job sometimes, even if you have your health.
     
  9. voodoo child

    voodoo child New commenter

    Are you aware that for women of our age (I'm 58 too) we won't get a state pension till 62? I know how you feel but I do think that the reality is (slightly) better than the thought. I'm going to try and stick it out till I get my state pension and have the maximum possible teachers pension as you have to exist on that money for the rest of your life which is scary. I worked out that for every extra year in teaching I will get £500 a year more pension for the rest of my life so feel that is hard to achieve by other means. You could always look for another job (not teaching ) or do tutoring but it is hard to achieve the very good. I think that a long time off does dent your confidence and you tend to focus on the worst aspects of the job. Keep plodding on if you can but if you can't use the system to get the maximum benefit for yourself.
     
  10. Hmm this is the position I am finding myself in too, although nowhere near retirement age. I spend 400 pound a month on travel so am able to look for jobs that are less well paid but more local.
    I used to love my job (I believe you and I have similar jobs Cosmos) but it has changed so much my job isn't the same and to be honest there isn't enough work for me. My boss has been unable to replace team members that have left that would be far more valuable to the business that I am currently.
    Anyway enough of me, cosmos, if you don't need the money, then look for something else maybe part-time that you might enjoy, that way you are still contributing but are not doing a job that you no longer enjoy.
    Sending a virtual hug.
     
  11. Cosmos I retired by accident at 55. That is to say it was not planned and came about through a variety of circumstances which left me relatively financially independent.
    As a result of this I would say that you need to plan your retirement not just financially but mentally. I found suddenly stopping quite traumatic and it has really taken me at least 18 months to get my head sorted. I don't have a partner so it was very much a decision that I took on my own.
    I now have a non teaching job which takes up 2 days a week and I feel that I am now in a period of transition from full-time work to full-time retirement. If I had been able to move from full-time teaching to my current situation it would have been much better.
    So my advice would be retire by all means but don't blunder into it like I did.
     
  12. magic surf bus

    magic surf bus Star commenter

    I've already done two supply covers this year for staff who've been out within days of handing in their resignations, by mutual agreement with their HT. I wouldn't presume to advise you if you should go early, but if you should come to that conclusion you don't have to hang on for months.
     
  13. lindenlea

    lindenlea Star commenter

    You'll probably feel a bit better once you're back. Living on a pension can be very different from having a nice salary particularly if you have been used to spending a lot. I don't blame your OH for not being keen on losing your salary but if you really can't stand it any longer you'll have to talk him round. We worked for as long as we could and then baled (sp?) out. Now we are fairly young retirees ( I was 58 when I went). OH is like a pig in muck and I'm getting there. It is very different and you have the chance to do all sorts of things you could never do if you were working but you have to balance this with the finances. I do still get bored some days.
    Absolutely no regrets though.
    See how you are in a month and then decide.
     
  14. Thank you people - I feel a little better now. I will wait a little while before making any rush judgements but I honestly think my days are numbered. I need time to do the things I want to while I am still able to do them and this job is very tiring both mentally and physically.
    With regard to the state pension, I just made the cut off date and can claim at 60 if I choose. 10 years teacher's pension is laughable so won't be relying on that to keep me in vino in my old age!
    Many Thanks
    C x
     
  15. catmother

    catmother Star commenter

    Are you sure? There was another change to the State Pension age which was announced in the budget,it especially affected women your age who had expected to retire at 60. The calculator on the DWP's site has not been changed as yet but some newspapers have put out useful info out:

    www.thisismoney.co.uk/pensions/article.html?in_article_id=517005&in_page_id=6
     
  16. OMG! I missed that. You're right, it would seem I can't claim until 2015. B*gger.
    That is outrageous. Rethink in order then. B*gger, b*gger, b*gger
     
  17. voodoo child

    voodoo child New commenter

    I don't think you're correct there. You can take your teachers pension at 60 but not your state pension if you are currently 58.. Your teachers pension will be an eighth of your current salary as you have done 10 years (but you're not paying pension and NI. Here's a link for state pensions for women. http://www.thisismoney.co.uk/pensions/article.html?in_article_id=517005&in_page_id=6 All women born after 1950 - 1955 are on the sliding scale that puts pensions up to 65 for women. Last week they said that the 1954 women will be hit hard as they will have to wait till they are 66 = so hit with a double whammy. Hope this helps you make up your mind.
     
  18. catmother

    catmother Star commenter

    Sorry to have been the one giving you the bad news!
     
  19. *sigh*
    looks like I'll be doddering around my classroom teaching until I'm 75 at this rate.
    good luck with the retiring plan - my Mum is investigating and she's a similar age to you, but not in teaching, and with very few years of contributions to a state pension at all.
     
  20. Just what I needed to hear today catmother!!
    [​IMG]
     

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