I think I have PND. I have been burying these feelings for months but things have got so bad that I don't think I can anymore. LO is nearly 9 months and up until about 3 months ago everything was great. Now I can't get through a day with floods of tears. I have to drag myself out of the house, I'm irritable to the point of being evil. I have no patience with the LO and end up shouting at him then I'm devoured by guilt. I just don't think I can do anything right with him and he is not the happy baby he once was, he is much more demanding now he is older and move active and I'm not coping well with that. I can't believe I'm admitting this but when I leave my LO I don't even miss him anymore. I used to cry and feel guilty. Now I feel nothing, sometimes I'm even relieved. I can't wait for my OH to get home at the end of the day to take him off me. I love him more than anything and I would do anything for him and would never hurt him but I just feel like somebody has turned off the lights. It's hard to explain. I can't bear to admit this to my OH. He is amazing and helps out loads and always tells me I'm doing a good job, I don't want to let him down. I don't want any sympathy but I think I needed to write it down.