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I hated my bullying head so I resigned and I'm glad!

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by sarahstrawberry, Mar 15, 2011.

  1. I realised I wanted to be a teacher when I was 17 and working voluntarily in a primary school hearing readers etc. From then on I dedicated the next four years training towards my chosen career. My observations on teaching placements were good and I couldn't wait to have my very own class. I got my job at a primary school to start as soon as I had finished university in my chosen year group and it all seemed too good to be true. And it was. The bullying started from my headteacher about two months after I started in my NQT year. She would just walk into my classroom, sit down at the back and stare at me. Then she would walk out again. She would then ask for a meeting after school in which she would tell me everything I had done wrong or that was wrong with my classroom. These meetings would go on until about 6pm. For the first year I thought it was just me but then realised it was happening to everyone. I spent all my free time dedicated to my job because I loved the children and I wasn't going to let her take it away from me. In my second year I got two outstanding lesson observation and one good. A meeting was held to discuss why my good lesson hadn't been outstanding like my other two. One day a rainbow appeared in the sky. I stopped the lesson and took the children out to see it. Head came running out with a copy of my timetable to ask what I was doing. When I told her she reminded me that on my timetable it said 'maths' and that she didn't think rainbows had anything to do with maths. These are just tiny examples of the woman who dragged me down, took away my confidence and made me hate the job I had wanted so much. i had been to interviews to try and get out but never got the jobs. I went to my union but they were never much use. 5 years of this treatment later and I found out I was pregnant. The dates I was to go on maternity leave were not good enough, my workload grew and I was told not to expect special treatment just because I was pregnant even though I had never asked for any.
    One day I couldn't take anymore, I walked out and I resigned. Best thing I ever did. I may be absolutely skint but at least I have a beautiful daughter, I actually get to see my husband and I don't have an evil head shouting at me, brain washing me into thinking I am lazy and rubbish, I don't have to do paper work all day Sundays and I am now coming off the medication I had to take when she made me a nervous wreck. I just wish they had taught us about bullying heads at uni and how to deal with them. Looking back I should have left much sooner for my own sake. But at the time I thought it would look bad on my CV or I was lucky to have a wage in this climate. Silly me.
    I miss the children and regret that I never got the chance to say goodbye. I've since heard that my head is retiring soon. She will have a happy retirement I'm sure.People keep telling me not to give up and that one day I will be back teaching with a nice headteacher but I am not so sure. For now I just wish I hadn't wasted four years at uni training for a job in a school that nearly gave me a nervous breakdown.
    If anyone out there has a head similar to mine you have my sympathy x x x
     
  2. bobbycatrules

    bobbycatrules New commenter

    Just wanted to say well done to you for putting up with the abuse for 5 years. After only several months of a wacko headteacher I couldn't take any more and left.
     
  3. Well done for sorting it. You know in your heart this would never get better as long as this woman lived.
    And so teaching once again loses its investment in a talented teacher because it will not face up to its epidemic of workplace bullying.
    And we're meant to give the kids a sense of ethics......
     
  4. DaisysLot

    DaisysLot Senior commenter

    I worked for an appalling head teacher once. I did finally leave. But to encourage you for the future all schools are not the same, and there are indeed some great head teachers out there who would embrace a creative and committed teacher such as yourself when you are ready. Do not be put off by having come across one bad egg in the dozen :)
     
  5. I did try to do supply just so that I could experience different schools and maybe see for myself that there are some nice schools. But there wasnt much supply work available with my agency (although they didn't tell me that when they took my crb money). So for now I've put my career completely on hold. I'm teaching my daughter to read already she's only 10 months. You can take the teacher out of the school.....I hope one day I will go back to teaching. It would be a bonus if the paperwork is less by then! [​IMG]
     
  6. Sure you will be able to get back in when the time is right. Sorry you had such an awful experience - I have had similar but am in a lovely school now. Good luck in the future.
     
  7. kash645

    kash645 New commenter

    You made a very brave and wise decision. Well done for putting your family and sanity before an awful job. I definitely agree with other posts on here. You had an awful experience, but there ARE some truly great schools and great Heads. I also quit an awful school because of a bullying head. I watched many friends and colleagues going off with stress and breakdowns and decided that I wasn't going to be another victim. I had a fairly rocky ride for a year or so, doing supply work. Eventually, I got the most fantastic job, 3 days, in a great school. I love going to work and I can't believe, looking back, that I stayed at such an awful school for so long ( 12 years)! Maybe, when you feel ready, you could look at part time teaching/job share. I would thoroughly recommend it. Much less workload generally as it's shared between two of you and time for your family. For now, enjoy your gorgeous daughter and take care x
     
  8. I have written a lot about bullying of staff in schools. I don't know how much you have read but i do believe that the more people understand about how bullying actually operates, the better able they are to avoid damage. Its good to read that you seem to be getting things sorted and are looking to a more positive future. It might still be worth reading some of the many threads which discuss and will provide validation for people who have been targetted or used.
    <ul class="initial_items">[*]
    <h3>
    Is your boss a psychopath or a narcissist
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    (151 posts, 0 new )

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    [*]
    <h3>
    Bullying of teachers by senior staff
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    (49 posts, 0 new )

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    <h3>
    Are all HT's aware of their 'special responsibility'
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    (175 posts, 0 new )

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    <h3>
    Staff Turnover
    </h3>

    (111 posts, 0 new )

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    <h3>
    Schools - Churches - Mostly good people. - an ideal environment ?
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    (42 posts, 0 new )

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    <h3>
    The most dangerous bullies 'bully by stealth'
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    (409 posts, 0 new )

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    [*]
    <h3>
    Once
    upon a time there was this brilliant teacher who seems to have lost the
    plot. - The rumours that he wasn't coping must be true.

    </h3>

    (341 posts, 0 new )

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    [/LIST]Happy days ahead.

     

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