We have just buried an elderly loved one. It was thought by some members of her family that she wished for a humanist funeral and no weeping. However most of us have wept continuously all over Christmas. And all through this humanist funeral too. I have never see to much grief at a funeral. Not that I have been to that many really. And never taken much note to the goings on being often in grief myself. I did believe it might be OK. It was not. So after a 10 minute recap of life - a complex human life full of joy and pain - the meaning of her existence was reduced to utter trivia and unrecognizable trivia at that. An awful poem someone had written for the occasion was cringe worthy and the author did not make it to the funeral. Another long standing acquaintance gave a tearful Reference that was squirmy sentimental. Her sister had provided a poem to be read which was that dreadful "Do not stand at my grave" thing.... I am not dead! At a crematorium? We were invited to reflect (or pray if you Really Have To!) during a blast of Nessum Dorma. I have seen better job applications. It was awful. The only avowed Humanist who probably inspired this idea - an elderly and rather frail lady - she did not make it to the bash. She is so scared of DEATH (sh) that she does not dare make the journey or risk the chance of infection which might cause her to die (sh). I am left with a feeling that a room full of people were left pretty distressed. What are we? Just a flying coffin folks. Except that maybe in the words of that poem, we tinkle in the wind and blow in the rain or something. Recycled matter of undecided value and existence. All the above might have been OK at a wake, a post ceremony remembrance but at a reception for the coffin it was awkward and inappropriate. And as the words "X thought of herself as a Christian" came out of the Humanist Ministers mouth I just curled up inside.