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how do you switch off?

Discussion in 'Workplace dilemmas' started by bleakoutlook, May 7, 2012.

  1. Again thank you, have read this over a couple of times now and am trying to keep it in perspective, unfortunately here ai am at 12.35 a.m. stewing over it...... Really am my own worst enemy sometimes. But I do feel like I have a plan now which is good and will get in touch with my union just to cover my back. Have always had some really honest and helpful advice on here - you guys are amazing!
     
  2. I wonder why the parent is refusing to come to school and discuss the complaint if the issue is as serious as they say it is? Perhaps they know they haven't go a leg to stand on.
     
  3. Being able to switch off is something that needs practise. Often we seem to be constantly re-winding and re-playing scenarios in our heads. One trick is to tell yourself precisely what you are going to do "Eg tomorrow I will see the head and find our her/his stance on this. Then, at 5:27pm tomorrow I will sit down and see if I still have a problem.By allocating a specific action to the dilemma, you can then tell the voice that you heard what was said, that you have thought about it, and that it will be sorted tomorrow. Be firm with yourself, and you may find the concerns dissipate. Most of the time we seem overly bound up with our perception of the problem, rather than the substantive issue. Hope this helps.
     
  4. anon2799

    anon2799 New commenter

    I find a pad and pen at my bedside helps. If I wake up and remember something I write it down to deal with in the morning. Hope you're relaxed about tomorrow op. take control of the situation. Maybe suggest to the head that you and he/she meet with the parent to clear the air? Only if you feel up to it though. Good luck. Let us know how you get on.
     
  5. I find the best way to switch off when trying to get to sleep is to think of a dream type scenario. I used to plan my ideal house, room by room with furnishings etc but now I have just moved house I needed to find something else - and no, my new house is nothing like my dream house!
    At the moment I vary my night thoughts, sometimes I dream of winning the Euro lottery and decide how much I am going to give people, sometimes I plan what clothes I am going to take on my holiday this year, sometimes I think about how to improve my social life and meet a man or sometimes I think about my landscaping plans for the garden. As soon as any school-type worries enter my head, I turn over and start my dream again to get rid of the worrying thoughts.
    I am so boring even to myself that I am usually asleep within minutes - or is that the effect of the gin i drink when unable to sleep!
     
  6. Tolchard

    Tolchard New commenter

    Forgive me for sounding unsympathetic but any teacher who actually sheds tears about what a parent
    thinks of them seriously needs to get a grip. You're the one with letters after your name -why on earth do you care at all about what some ignorant know-it-all thinks of your teaching? In my experience, such types are usually the worst
    kinds of jobsworths - lower middle-class chavs (yes they do exist) who don't know their place. My advice is to one of the following
    1. Chuck any letters in the bin and do nothing.
    2. Put the letters up in the staff room for people to laugh at and do nothing
    3. Write her a snotty letter reminding her who the professional is.

    Hope this helps.
     
  7. A problem is that, these days, SMTs seem to be very sensitive to unfavourable input from parents, whether what they say is justified or not. The very fact that your teaching has illicited parental comment can be used against you, if it is expedient for them to do so.
     
  8. ianj6

    ianj6 New commenter

    Coping strategies;
    1) Leave work, (ie marking, reports, planning etc) in work, be there longer, (if necessary) but leave it there.
    2) Set yourself "working hours", and try to stick to them (but make sure you give enough time for what you need to do). If you do manage to do everything and it's before your self enforced working hours, it feels like you're leaving early, (even if its 1730!)
    3) (and my best worker), Have an object, maybe a tree, a house, a landmark etc on your way home, and try to discipline yourself to make that the break point, at that point you think about your own kids etc. This doesn't always work but it helps

    hope the above helps

    ian
     
  9. Thank you. I will be trying these ideas. I find it really hard to switch off when I come home and am really bad for replaying situations and letting it affect my mood when I'm at home. Worst thing today was it was only one out of the 28 children who caused me to feel so negative!
     
  10. Thank you everyone, the situation is still ongoing, my head has written a very lengthy but supportive reply to his rants. We now just sit and wait I guess. I do 'need to get a grip' as someone said, but I do find it so difficult. I will definitely be trying some of these techniques. I will let you know what happens as I know this probably won't be the end of it!
     
  11. Torey

    Torey Occasional commenter

    Your head is supporting you. The letters will probably carry on. For you though it is ended. Let the head take it on. I think most people will take the one criticism out of 28 to heart.
     

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