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Discussion in 'Personal' started by YesMrBronson, Jan 22, 2011.
...when you look at old photos?
Ah. Well, I feel sad that the old me has gone forever - that thin, happy-go-lucky girl with no worries, how happy she looks.
And then I feel a sense of happy nostalgia for the days captured on film - the laughs, the friends, the moments, and here is the evidence - once I was young, once I was lovely, once I was happy.
Finally, I feel a sense of relief - I am no longer that stupid, gullible child. I know ALL about men now. And given the choice, men or cake, I know what I'd choose.
Mixture of feelings really. Sad, happy, wistful.
When I look at photos of myself from way back, I mostly feel old, knackered and past it.
And slightly disappointed...
Old, wrinkly, knackered and wonder where that wee girl went.
But happy, nostalgic and glad I had the life I have had.
Nowadays, I hate having my photo taken - but my kids once said to me that when they are old, they wouldn't want photos of just them without me. So I grin and bear it.
I really, really, really hate looking at old photos.
Most of this is due to some serious body issues that I am slowly overcoming.
Also, I have about a year of my life that is a total blank. I have no memories of these months and will probably never recover them. It is seriously weird to look at photos and see myself holding my baby niece and not recalling even visiting my brother! I accept that I must have been there - but just don't remember any of it!....Plus looking at those photos of myself it is clear that I am not in a 'good place'!
I have recently looked at some old school photos and have laughed at them with mum....How was it that noone noticed that I was Aspie? There is a class photo of smiling laughing Primary School kids and sitting in the front row, serenely looking into space, in her own little world and the only one not smiling - is me! The 'individual' school photos are just as telling...I have a couple showing me pulling some strange sort of face...lips pursed closely together, eyes screwed up in concentration - I was told to smile and had no idea of how to do that! (I can smile naturally, but never to order!)
Photos of previous generations? Absolutely fascinating.
My great grandad's photos? He was a professional photographer - I can't get enough of them. I found one online not long ago.
Photos of my generation? Interesting, not especially embarrassing, but what **** cameras my family had in the 60s and 70s.
My photos? I enjoy looking at them - I've loved photography since my teens.
That's how I feel. We found lots of photos when we were clearing out my Gran's belongings last year and found some of her Mum. I'm the spitting image of her and, for some reason, feel really pleased about that.
I hate photos of myself but there aren't many of me anyway, not many from my childhood (perhaps 8 of them).
The one thing that really rankles me about my ex is that he took all of the photos of our children with him and won't let me have any of them. I've only got a few of them as children (they're grown up now) and I'd like to have looked back on those days occasionally.
I love taking photos though and I've got albums and albums full of the family (taken after my divorce).
I love looking at old photos - hate ones from my childhood though.
My university ones are the my favourite, I just wish I appreciated at the time that I would not ever have a flat stomach again and be that stress free and made the most of it. I think I go through phases of being photogenic and that was the only time!
Photos of family I find interesting if its people I know, I can't sit through loads of photos unless I know who the people are.
Why this outpouring of self-loathing over photos from childhood/teens? You were who you were. I was a spotty geek in my teens, and I sported a lousy haircut. My kids say I look like the young version of Homer Simpson in the few snaps that exist of me between ages 10 and 19. Now I'm not far off the older version of Homer Simpson. I can't say any of it bothers me in the least.
John Berger's argument for this is, is that girls learn to internalise the 'male gaze' from an early age. Boys do not.
Doesn't matter from what era - I generally hate looking at photos of myself at all!
I was just pondering - what will it be like for future generations now that we are in the digital age. Photo albums are becoming something of a rarity and you can even get digital photo frames now (I don't like them, they make me feel dizzy).
When I look at photos of me as a child, I think how much I would love to go back to that time and make different choices. If I did that then maybe I wouldn't be in the mess I am now.
When I look at photos of me with my first serious boyfriend (5 year relationship) I notice how my eyes aren't smiling and why I didn't realise back then how unhappy I was.
When I look at my summer photos with my recent ex, I see that same look in my eyes. That something just wasn't right .
Then I look at the photos of me with the ex I didn't really get over and see happiness in my eyes. The same happiness I see in photos of me when I was a child, and the same eyes in photos of me camping with my Guides.
My eyes tell me a lot about how I was feeling at different stages in my life.
I feel happy and nostalgic...they were good times......and there's more good times ahead.....
Funny, I was just leafing through some old albums this morning - we have a new (ish) baby and parents keep digging out old albums to show us how much he looks like my husband and I. I am really taken aback by how much I look like my mum when I was just alittle baby.
It's funny how looks get passed down the generations and the fam,ily resemblence can be so strong.
I love looking at the things in the background of family snaps and at the clothes people are wearing. And the hairstyles!
Me too! I feel a sense of bereavement for the person I once was, and the people in my life, for what they once were.
(Kibosh, interesting that John Berger stuff! I used to read his work avidly)
Yes and this feeling (tenderness, love, the desire to protect and save) somehow makes the present moment seem all the more fragile and transient. That's why I rarely enjoy looking at old photos. It also depends greatly on who I am looking at the old photos with.
I only ever read 'Ways of Seeing'. Here are some quotes from John Berger on the subject of photography.
“All photographs are there to remind us of what we forget. In this -- as in other ways -- they are the opposite of paintings. Paintings record what the painter remembers. Because each one of us forgets different things, a photo more than a painting may change its meaning according to who is looking at it.”
“Unlike any other visual image, a photograph is not a rendering, an imitation or an interpretation of its subject, but actually a trace of it. No painting or drawing, however naturalist, belongs to its subject in the way that a photograph does.”
"The camera relieves us of the burden of memory. It surveys us like God, and it surveys for us. Yet no other god has been so cynical, for the camera records in order to forget.”
That's the one that sticks in my mind. I must get another copy. (I was writing my thesis on 'Women in Art' at the time, around 1979!)
I found those quotes on photography very moving. (I think I ust be in a maudlin mood today)
You and me both then