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Helping my son feel positive

Discussion in 'Personal' started by saz0908, Feb 2, 2012.

  1. I don't feel capable enough to do home education.

    I like the coping strategies idea physics_suits_you.

    Thank you all for your ideas and support.
  2. clear_air

    clear_air New commenter

    I was dreadfully unhappy from the middle of Y6 until I went to sixth form college, and re-invented myself. I tried at secondary, but I just didn't know how. Coping strategies, and spending some time thinking about how other people might perceive my behaviour would have really helped me. 'Never show them you care' was a lesson that took me a long time to learn on my own.
  3. Look for an activity out of school that will a. take his mind off things. b. give him the opportunity to meet new young people and c. give him something to aim for and a sense of achievement. Try to limit the amount of time you ininitiate talking with him about anything negative as this will only reinforce how **** he is feeling. However, if your son initiates conversation about school and how bad this is making him feel ofcourse talk with him honestly.
  4. just a thought ......
    give him the reasons why some kids may be cruel to others.
    They are usually weak, scared and trying to prove themselves. They may not have supportive home lives - they may not have a good grounding in sound social behaviours.
    ....... reduce the 'power' they have. Try to see their weakness's
    This won't solve anything but it may be an addition to the perspective.
  5. Doitforfree

    Doitforfree Star commenter

    I've never really understood that argument that children need to go to school and have a miserable time so they can learn to cope with lots of different kinds of people. I surround myself with people I like and avoid those who don't. I don't see why children should be expected to put up with horrible people all day toget them used to the idea. In fatc the best copers I've seen are the home ed children, who take all kinds of other people in their stride, whatever their age and personality. Maybe it's because they're not forced to be with them for six or seven hours aday five days a week that makes them more tolerant.
    I'm not sure a six year old is going to have that much perspective. If he's misevable because other people are being horrible to him then that's awful and is not going to make him a better adult.Nor should he have to put up with it just because those other people might have problems. They're not their fault but they're not his fault either.
    Sorry, I don't feel I really know what to say. I've been there, and these things usually resolve themselves eventually, and often in an unexpected way.
  6. Doitforfree

    Doitforfree Star commenter

    A lady I knew with a child in a similar situation sent her to Stagecoach and it hugely boosted her confidence and made her happier at school.
  7. The lad is year 6, not age 6.
    Its a horrible situation - for the lad and his mum. I can feel my maternal tigress claws out just thinking about it.
    Anything that can help him understand that it is not his fault may help.
    some people cant choose who they are with on a daily basis - adults included.

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