Connect with like-minded education professionals and have your say on the issues that matter to you.
Don't forget to look at the how to guide.
Discussion in 'Personal' started by The Red Heron, Apr 2, 2008.
they giveth yet they taketh away
Don't yell at me, but i can see richie's point tbh. He isn't expressing it very politely, but there are people in teaching who just can't cope with it. And I am not being smug, I don't think I can either!!!
Stress is not about not being able to cope with teaching. That is something quite different. Stress is an illness. Like cancer is an illness, or flu, or shingles.
and that's it, I definitely agree, but why is it okay for people to "fake" stress and not to "fake" cancer?
I think it was the few pages back I must have seen, but the thing I did pick up on was when richie says that people tend to convince themselves of a change in attitude when they associate with others with a similar attitude.
Regarding depression/stress, of course the problem is that there aren't any "signs" and so it's seen as easy to "fake" and a few people sadly do. Not quite the same thing but a while back my husband had terrible problems with his back, he would literally stand up and go back down again! He fretted endlessly about taking time off his job (in the NHS) because no one could find anything wrong. Stress can be similar, I think.
Also, I think it can be a problem because if it is work based stress it will often go when the teacher is off work, leaving her feeling good and others percieve this.
However I will be honest, I have been stressed, very stressed, and yet haven't taken time off as ultimately I want to leave and I think taking time off could affect that.
Feeling stressed is not the same thing as clinical stress, the mental illness!
It is a bit like the people who claim they have flu when they just have a heavy cold.
I'm not going to go into my personal circumstances, partly because hannahholly is a tad too close to my real name to allow me to do so and also partly because I just don't want to. Suffice to say I drive over a bridge to work every morning. There have been points where I have considered driving over it. I do know the difference between "stressed and Stressed."
So yes, when people fake it, it does make me angry.
Referring to the person in TRH's OP.
I have seen fakers. They have a bit of a hard time and get signed off with 'stress' for god knows how long. It is frustrating. It also makes life that bit more difficult for genuine cases. I've not read ALL of this thread, only dipped in and out, so apologies if I have missed anything important.
Dear Miss D
Oh dear I apologise if I have upset you colleague. I was merely arguing a point which I thought I was entitled to do. I beg you please if you wish, illustrate where I have directly insulted anyone. Your last post confirms to me that perhaps your perspective on life is slanted despite your attempts at civilised discourse on other threads. I do not know you ,have no argument with you, yet am a victim of a tirade of abuse which has no justification. For whatever I have said that has caused you distress I humbly apologise. Please let it rest sister and find some comfort somewhere x Bless you and yours x
I am sick of people on here as well use the analogy of a 'broken leg' or 'cancer' to year on year bouts of 'stress' or 'depression'-can these people not see their not the same. When would somebody have a broekn limb 5 years running? The original post was about an ex colleague of mine whom my other ex colleagues know has taken the **** for too long, breezes in and out when working half days, never says thank you to the people who pick up the pieces (apparently) and whom it will happen again and again with for as mnay years as the school is unfortunate enough to have her. Morale at the school is poor becuase of this, and it is not right, how anyone can say it is, is bizarre. People are being paid a UPS salary for doing a fraction of the work other mainscale teachers are. I did not realise capability could have been started against her, and should have been a long time ago.
I am sick of people talking out of their ***** about depression. Every school has procedures in place to ensure employees are protected from discrimination whilst also being accountable.
okay miss d meaner
if you say so
Yes, you did make your point already, Miss D.
I didn't say I haven't had personal experience. But it doesn't mean I have not.
Anyone faking an illness, whether mental or physical, angers me, largely because I have seen so many people beloved to me go through serious, terminal illnesses without a murmur of complaint.
How would staff know why someone was off - is it not confidential?
I don't know of teachers who have done this but have a friend, in a very different line of work, who has. He had a major breakdown years ago and a few years later proudly told me he'd got himself signed off for 3 months "faking" depression. He was prescribed anti-depressants which he sold via the internet and had to attend weekly group therapy sessions.
The thing is he was ill, his doctor, I and his other friends could see it, but he thought he was winning by blagging time off. No surprise for me when he was hospitalised for another 3 months.
I think that anyone who wants to remove themselves from a major part of their life (work) is suffering in some sort of way. So your seemingly breezy, selfish colleague, who boasts about going home at lunchtimes, is more than likely suffering an illness that you can only hope you never understand.
This kind of case just very bad for staff morale
A complete lack of understanding about depression is just very bad for the depressive. Do you actually know - I mean really know - what depression is? It isn't just having a couple of bad days, it's not the same as work-related stress, it isn't even necessarily caused by stress or the job.
I have suffered from clinical depression for most of my life (and I do mean childhood as well). I was diagnosed officially 8 years ago (I am 26 now) and it is the most horrendous thing you could try to imagine. It is not about trying to "beat the system". If you are truly depressed you do not have the enerygy to "take the pi$$". You don't have the energy to get up in the morning as there is really no reason to bother. Your life is complete blackness with no escape. So if a depressive is able to go in for a morning that is such a huge achievement. It may annoy you that you can't have afternoons off but you need understanding. And with regard to her "breezy" attitude, you get very good at hiding your true feelings from other people for fear of being labelled as miserable, whiney or self-centred. I think you need to do some research into what depression is and I really, truly hope you never ever suffer from it yourself as it is the worst feeling in the world.
Good grief, you simmered for a good long time on heron's post, dincha?
You really do need help with that depression
haha. i only just noticed the date after i posted. still, i think i make a valid point that stands 3 years on.