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Have I done something really awful? I took off a child's shoe because he was constantly fiddling with it instead of listening to me.

Discussion in 'Primary' started by byronipuss, Jun 24, 2010.

  1. I took a childs shoe of him when i was training, hell i took loads of things of him and put them all on top of the WB (a shelf about 8cm deep)
    In the end the kids used to call it (insert childs name) shelf.
    The kid didn't seem to mind
     
  2. Remember, It's just a chat. Hopefully it wasn't too painful. I did the same in my year 1 class in front of the whole class. I don't think it's so acceptable in upper years (def not in secondary). My colleague always tells her children she will take away anything they play with, including shoes. She reminds them first. I did it once. My LSA was there and she agreed with me that is was justified, (He is SEN, and the LSA has worked very close with him since Reception). If children fiddle with other things, I warn them I am coming round to check and make pinching fingers. (Works well for rubbers, pens, boards and pots of money on the carpet).

    Let us all know how you got on, I will read on further posts and check.


     
  3. Glad it all worked out well for you. Most parents can be supportive (My first term of my NQT a parent shouted at me in front of the whole class) I thought they must think I'm a terrible teacher but they were sympathetic and the wife told me he shouts all the time! Then there was the time a parent thought I had poisoned their child with some "African food" (rice, beans and sweet corn from Tesco, even though a stomach bug is going around right now and no one else got sick).
    We live and learn and parents will always be on our backs. What doesn't kill us, only makes us stronger!
     
  4. I teach Year 2 and have a standing rule the children all know and understand - if you fiddle with your shoes you are warned, if you carry on you lose them till the end of the lesson. I'm happy to explain that to any parent. Storm in a tea cup... hope it sorts out. :)
     
  5. I despair of this rubbish-your response seems perfectly reasonable: ask for required behaviour, set limit, implement sanction.
    Text?????? get another number, give to your friends and family and switch your other one off at the week-end. I've had two headships and nothing was ever so critical as to require clarification/set a meeting over the weekend. This is not a Critical Incident requiring an information chain to be activated!
    All the best with the outcome of this and your search for another job: this dithering in the face of parents who refuse to discipline their own kids and object to others setting limits have cost us dearly as a profession and as a society.
     
  6. Good luck - hope things work out in your favour!
     
  7. Hope the "chat" went well today. I remove shoes and all sorts. I can't decide which is worse actually -noisy velcro or laces they can't tie and insist on undoing all the time! Give me a buckle any day! Or a zip up boot! (although most of those aren't very suitable)
    My PGCE student did tell a parent though that their child was not allowed to wear their shoes with lights the next day as they had been too distracting for him, and thus others. I nearly died when I heard her say it and was ready to dive in and say it was OK for him to wear them (he hadn't been *that* bad with them), but the parent said, "there you go, you heard your teacher, you can't blame me now" and went away quite happily so I just left it. I think she got lucky and I did say to her that she should probably not have told his parent that he wasn't allowed to wear the shoes, certainly not without checking with me first! Some parents would not have stood for that I don't think.
     
  8. I've taken shoes away from children who've had a warning and wouldn't stop fiddling with them. I don't think it's an unreasonable thing to do, especially since you gave them back after 5 mins. I don't think there's any way you'd end up losing your job over it.
     
  9. firecracker

    firecracker New commenter

    I must admit (I think this should really be on that other confessions thread !) I have taken all the shoes left on the cloakroom floor and those that weren't claimed I put in the bin - good job my fab TA took them and put them on my desk for when parents came to see where their darlings shoes were !!!! they haven't left the floor like that since !!
     
  10. Get out of that sch, heads should back their teaching staff. Can tell you off privately but should had dealt with the situation there and then, not arranged a meeting. Some parents believe that their chn are angels and everyone else is out to get them. That child will now ensure that every teacher who upsets them for anything is pulled up in front of the head because of his/hers parents attitude to them being told off. My parents would had punished me and then wrote to the sch saying they supported the teachers action. A lot has changed in 40 years.
     
  11. I too have removed shoes (velcro in particular) after a warning and never had any comeback. I've also worked in a school with no Head backup....and it gradually wears your confidence down and belief in yourself....so get out!!!! I got out in time and went to a school that had a supportive head...and therefore supportive colleagues. Love my job!! Been teaching over 30 years and moved around a bit too. Start looking, life's too short to spend a weekend worrying over removing a shoe!!
     
  12. Have you done something wrong, jeez, the only thing you've done wrong as far as I can see is ummmm, your job.... I too, have been known to remove shoes from children as the velcro and the ultra long and untied laces irritate me! They distract teaching and learning time, and god knows that there are enough interruptions in the school day with assemblies, concert practises, dysfunctional transition programs and 'kids with problems' (read: badly behaved) - without dealing with that too. How long do other kids, who want to learn, have to put up with it?
    Go to your head, and tell them that you felt unsupported in that incident. Tell them how you would like 'parental concerns' about you, to be dealt with in the future from them. Be assertive, be professional, and be consistent - take the shoes away again if you need to - be consistent. :D
     
  13. sinclair75

    sinclair75 New commenter

    I removed a pupil's shoe from a class other than my own during assembly once. I gave it back after assembly - he apologised and asked for it. No comeback of reprecussion. This is odd and I'd say nothing to lose sleep over. If you have a reason for doing it, other than fancying the shoes, I'm sure you'll be fine.
     
  14. netmum

    netmum New commenter

    Wow, I can;t see anything wrong at all unless it was an abvious health and safety issue for example I have a no sicks on hall floors policy.

    As a parent though I do have to say it is a NIGHTMARE buying children's shoes. You can not buy laced up shoes at all and it is really difficult to get them without either flashing lights or toys in the heels if you want well fitting shoes ( I ahve one child with a very narrow foot and another with an incredibly high instep)
     
  15. jillinthebox

    jillinthebox New commenter

    If I ever get my hands on the idiot who put those stupid toys in the heels - they're going to be trussed up in a room full of three thousand five year old boys in new velcro shoes all going kkskkskskskssssh kkskkskskskssssh kkskkskskskssssh kkskkskskskssssh kkskkskskskssssh for a few decades, then they're going to be soundly bludgeoned over the head with a kids shoe that's completely collapsed in the heel because of the stupid hole they designed in them for another decade, before I start inserting those silly dolls from the shoes into bodily orifices.
     
  16. tangerinecat

    tangerinecat New commenter

    Go jill! You have a nation of teachers behind you...
     
  17. Courage, mon vieux/ma poule! (come to think of it, that's probably offensive, too!) As the others say: stand your ground. And try to find a school with a HT who backs their staff. Ours would walk past a classroom that was on fire, only concerned about whether the smoke could be seen from the main road. I once had a kid who worked very quickly (and well) through worksheets, and was always up at my desk, asking me to mark them. Eventually, I asked him to remove both his shoes and hand them to me, which he did, and I then scattered drawing pins all round his chair. He saw the joke and got the point, as did his mother, who was, and is, a colleague and friend. And he was so damaged by the experience, he went on to be Head Boy and fairly recently came top of his year at Uni. This may not be much to the point, but I hope it's made you smile.
     

  18. Oh dear, kind of lost the moral high ground there. It was all going quite well up until that point.
     
  19. shootingstars

    shootingstars New commenter

    I'm quite young not an old bag as described in another reply but I have also been known to take shoes off the children after they have ignored my warnings and carried on velcro ripping. But the best one is the things they bring from home, all the children know I will take it off them if I see anything so whnever i'm around toys 'magically' stay in pockets. i am eagerly awaiting to read what happened with the meeting, hope it was in your favour.
     
  20. WHAT THE HEAD SHOULD REALLY DO IS TALK TO YOU FIRST AND THEN SEE THE PARENT ON HER OWN AND TELL HER SHE IS BEING OVERPROTECTIVE AND THAT SHE BACKS HER STAFF 100%
    THE HEAD SHOULD NOT BE DRAGGING YOU INTO WHAT COULD BE A CONFRONTATIONAL SITUATION WITH A PARENT.
    IT IS THE HEADS JOB TO PROTECT STAFF FROM HASSLE FROM FUSSY PARENTS.
    THE JOB IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH WITHOUT THE HEAD MAKING IT HARDER FOR HER STAFF TO KEEP CONTROL OF DISRUPTIVE CHILDREN AND THAT IS WHAT THAT CHILDS BEHAVIOUR AMOUNTED TO.
    LOOK FOR ANOTHER JOB WITH A SUPPORTIVE HEAD WHO IS NOT AFRAID OF THEIR OWN SHADOW AND DOES NOT KOWTOW TO PARENTS.
     

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