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Have been kicked in the teeth, how do I stop becoming cynical?

Discussion in 'Senior Leadership Team' started by Gandalf, Jul 15, 2011.

  1. I'm so disappointed I did someone a really big favour to help out, I worked really hard outside my usual remit, it seems she used me and then just kicked me in the teeth after using all my ideas and data analysyse and input for improving end of key stage levels, which were successful and used to provide detailed evidence for our inspection, which had an excellent result! I'm gobsmacked! Can't believe it because I've known and worked for this person for 8 years and really trusted them, had no reason not too. Leaves a nasty taste in ones mouth, I won't be so free with my help in future. And I feel very foolish too. At least I can relax through the summer after an excellent inspection report, but thats the only consolation I can find. I would like to move schools but with no permanent full time jobs in my area, how do I stop myself from becoming cynical?
     
  2. Sorry I am a bit unclear about how you feel used...you helped her, can you just explain what she did or didn't do? Did she claim credit for your work?
     
  3. Yes she claimed credit for my work, she had also told me there would be a tlr to apply for but that has been shelved because now I've put the structures for tracking and assessment in place she doesn't think there is any need for the tlr. Probably my fault for believing her and not having anything concrete in writing. But it does leave me very cynical. It is still not a very nice feeling, our working relationship until this has always been excellent.
     
  4. R13

    R13 New commenter

    Try and focus your emotions where they belong - you are describing feelings from one person treating you realy badly - so don't feel cynical about the world, about several billion people, about education systems etc. - just feel angry with the person who treated you awfully. Not trusting her again is pretty sensible - not trusting others is going to badly impact on you and them
     
  5. I feel for you - this is annoying and you feel used, I don't blame you...... On the plus side you did put something good together and it was used (in all sense of the word!), are you perhaps ready for a promotion, it seems like you have great ideas and these are being used without any credit to yourself. You might take this as a wake up call that really you are as good, if not better than the person above you and seek to develop your skills in management. I might be tempted to let others know in conversation that you did this job that they are taking credit for, although of course this could be construed as sour grapes, so you might be better taking it as some experience. But you have seen what this manager is like, and you know they will take credit for furture work, so be very careful what you give him/her in future....,..are they the end of the line, perhaps have a chat to the person above them as you are clearly ready for a next step up.
    Good Luck - don't be bitter - you did well and leaders who use people like this will eventually come upstuck.....[​IMG]
     
  6. Sorry, I meant unstuck.....though 'upstucking' somebody sounds painful and well deserved in this case.
    [​IMG]
     
  7. Thanks leadlearner, I'm looking at it with less emotion now. I have decided to look for other positions, possibly with a management role and use my knowledge to good effect. I am confident with what I did and can talk extensively about it so think that will be useful. Am disappointed by someone I trusted though, but we live and learn. I won't be so eager to offer my services again, will be holding back from now on.
     
  8. Good for you...you may look back at this and see that this manager acting like this has given you the stimulus to leave and move on...I worked with someone like this once, and I never looked back, who knows how she is getting the work done now, after I left other people had similar issues.....do hold back from them, but don't let it taint your views of other, people like this are generally in the minority I think... have a lovely summer and get all set for new opportunities come September - might be worth asking your Head if you can take on or help with something extra to support that application[​IMG]...
     

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