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funny things children say

Discussion in 'Trainee and student teachers' started by MissAitch, Dec 4, 2007.

  1. When teaching my reception class about the nativity and singing 'Away in a manger' and then attempting to write the story, one of my kids asked how to spell 'Wayne' Why do you want to know that I asked? How does Wayne fit into the nativity story? He sighed and said you know 'a Wayne in a manger......!'
  2. Talking to three year olds about animals...

    Teacher: What sound do cows make?
    Child: Moo!
    Teacher: And what is a baby cow?
    Child: A moose!
  3. Who painted the Mona Lisa?
    No reply, so I gave the hint...Leonardo.

    Leonardo de Caprio came the answer!!!
  4. One of my first Year 7 French lessons and we are talking about cultural aspects associated with France.
    I asked if anyone could think of any foods?
    I got the usuals but no cheese. So I asked if anyone could name any French cheeses. A hand shot up "swiss cheese" he replied!
  5. A friend relayed this to me a few years back.
    She had been asking students about what their parents did. One replied his father owned a jewellery shop; in response the next one shrugged and said "My father, he own a city.." His dad happened to be Sheikh Maktoum of Dubai. Apparently his timing and delivery were perfect.
  6. I was talking to the same year 8 class that I spoke about earlier in this thread.

    I told them that it was my last class with them tomorrow as I'm going to a different school after Christmas and one of them put their hand up and asked 'miss, have you got the sack?'
  7. walking past an empty shop window with my pre schooler. I discussed condensation to which he replied that 'it must be cold in the station'.
  8. I have an all-time favourite. About ten years ago, when ADHD first became popular, a particularly difficult 9 year old boy came into school really excited because, 'They know what's wrong with me now miss, I've got Aids'.
    Plus a rather sad one that happened more recently - a year 8 student watching A Christmas Carol said 'I hope Tiny Tim doesn't die, it's really sad when kids die,I don't think you should die until you are about 58' That gives me another 18 months then!
  9. Last year when discussing the Nativity with Primary 2-

    Me: What was Mary's husband's name?
    Child: Joseph
    Me: Do you know what job he did?
    Child: He was a carpenter.
    Me: And what does that mean? What would a carpenter do?
    Child: Lay carpets?

    True story - made me laugh!
  10. I was tickling an EAL child who was on a climbing rope and he hardly moved so I asked him if he was ticklish. He replied, 'No, I'm English'!
    We have been doing our nativity called 'Wriggly Nativity' at school. One day whilst doing guided reading, I pointed at a picture of a worm in the book and asked what it was. He didn't have a clue so I hinted... wiggly.... to which he replied... nativity.
  11. Classic from a year 3 child in my first class as an NQT. She came rushing back into the mobile classroom I was teaching in after a visit to the toilet. It was a bitterly cold day and she yelled excitedly,
    "Miss, miss, there's a testicle hanging from the roof!"
    She meant icicle, bless her.
  12. Last january whilst doing supply in a year one class. i was reading a poem to the class. To make sure everyone understood all the words i asked if anyone knew what a harbour was. one little hand shoots out straight away. she seemed so sure.... A pub miss!!!
  13. During the preliminary prep session for our First Holy Communion, when enquiring which of my children were Catholic, after a few had given their answers, one child said "I'm half Manc/half Geordie, so I don't know if I am or not!" Well I had to laugh!
  14. A year 6 child came in from the playground saying another child had 'itted' him at playtime and hurt him.
    Being really sympathetic I tried to divert him by saying that the correct grammar should be that he 'hit' him.
    'No miss, we were playing it and he itted me!' replied the indignant child! -made for much amusement in the staff room.
  15. another gem today...
    a yr1 student who was reading aloud and came across the word "whiskers" and i explained what it was, then asked what has whiskers. a flurry of hands went in the air and one girl said "my grandad" lol
    made me smile :)
  16. I set my year 1 class a PSHE activity the other day. What are you good at? and what do you need help with. What followed was a strange collection of answers however the best was...

    I am good at football, I need help riding a donkey.

  17. That's hilarious Racheljoy!
    Sounds just like something my reception class would say!
    Makes it all worthwhile!
  18. With one MFL class, I was teaching possessive adjectives using clothes. Students had to go round and say an item of clothing, i.e. ?your trousers? and their partner then pointed to the specific item of clothing to show they had understood. When one girl came up to me and said ?tes mouches? (literally translates as ?your flies? ? the buzzing version, not the one that keeps your trousers done up), I assumed she?d been looking up new words (incorrectly) and so instantly looked down, fully expecting to be embarrassed. After that, I realised she was actually saying ?t?es moche? (you?re ugly). I am not sure which is worse but she was none the wiser as to my bemused reaction and how much it made me laugh later on.
  19. After extensive planning and organising a Victorian Christmas History Day at school last week one of my class gave me the rather back handed compliment ' I thought it would be rubbish but I'm REALLY enjoying myself!'
  20. Had a classic on a year 11 mock paper last year. It was the electrical part of the paper and he question was to explain what a transformer was... one clever little begger said "its a robot in disguise". Made me chuckle.

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