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Funniest thing you've seen when marking work

Discussion in 'English' started by debbieryan, Feb 10, 2010.

  1. millicent_bystander

    millicent_bystander New commenter

    Moderating mock exams this week. 'The woman in the poem 'Song of the Old Mother' has OCD (Obsessive Cleaning Disorder) and she will basically have to clean for life.' !!! [​IMG]
  2. OneLooseCrank

    OneLooseCrank Occasional commenter

    A student of mine has completed two sides of an A4 sheet. Looked upon the first side and thought to glue it into her book as a leaf by gluing the margin she is looking at. This involves turning the sheet over, in which case the title side is glued in. She has realised that this isn't the best way to present the work incase I mark the rearside first as it is now uppermost. So, she has opened up the leaf to be looking at the title side, and then proceeded to trimm up the margin to free it from the book, only to realise that her writing on the rearside traverses the margin on the front... she has just cut straight through her work. To fix this, she has glued the rearside margin into her book so I now have a sheet of worked hacked up and glued all over the shop to attempt to mark.
    I think I'm going to have her write it out again...
  3. saluki

    saluki Lead commenter

    "once upon a time there was a poet called Simon Armitage. He was a rubbish poet and only ever wrote one poem. It was called 'Give'. The poem was so bad that the only people who would bought it was the AQA Anthology......"
    This was part of a GCSE re-creation task. It went on to recreate Simon Armitage penniless, living on the streets and begging for money.
    Although I admired the original approach I still failed the piece of coursework.
  4. markuss

    markuss Occasional commenter

    GCSE Y11. Great attempt to write about language - for Foundation tier.

    "The author says "summit" not "something". So he writes in slang."

    (Comment on passage about ascent of Everest.)
    blueskydreaming likes this.
  5. gogogulliver

    gogogulliver New commenter

    Q: What is the hardest part of the human body?

    A: The genitals.

    (Tutorial session about personal hygiene and health. I was expecting something about dental enamel. Not intended as a joke; she had learning difficulties and mixed up two words.)
  6. JeffNev

    JeffNev New commenter

    I was once marking scripts for AQA and was presented with something that was an X-rated attempt at trying to 'charm' me.
  7. cellerdore

    cellerdore Occasional commenter

    A child's joined writing made their words look like other words....

    "It will not be fair on the Year six as they have much harder **** (meant to be work) than the Year 5. Year 5 will have more time to do their ****, so will the year 4s and year 3s."

    I spat out my coffee
  8. Tangalle

    Tangalle New commenter

    Year 11 mock: you can tell the Cratchits are poor because they can’t afford wood or coal. They have to throw chestnuts on the fire to keep warm.
    frangipani123 likes this.
  9. yogapookey

    yogapookey New commenter

    'The writer has used a pathetic phallusy.'
    Who hasn't seen one of those in their time?
  10. manc

    manc New commenter

    The survivors of the Titanic were rescued by people in the lifeboats, and (it was supposed to say 'wrapped') in blankets'. Problems with letter doubling and silent letters gave the verb 'wrapped' a rather different provenance. Those Titanic survivors really did have a bad day, didn't they?
    blueskydreaming likes this.
  11. manc

    manc New commenter

    Year 7 writing about a foreign dignitary's visit to Britain: - 'When the plane arrived at the local airport, the Mayor stepped forward and gave the General a French kiss'.

    Well.... really!
    blueskydreaming likes this.
  12. gruoch

    gruoch Established commenter

    I had that, too :) But it wasn't a mock :-(

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