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Funniest thing you've seen when marking work

Discussion in 'English' started by debbieryan, Feb 10, 2010.

  1. You might have to be from the North East or be familiar with the accent but when answering the question: was Romeo right to kill Tybalt he wrote : IYI (aye whey aye)- I think he meant yes!
     
  2. Sorry - replying because I can't seem to work out how to post independently [​IMG]
    Marking Year 11 Modern History essays over the weekend, I came across this clanger:
    "Adolf Hitler used the Communists as spacegoats in order to further consolidate the Nazi Party's power."
    The poor girl meant 'scapegoats', but she proceeded to write an entire paragraph about the "Communist spacegoats". Talk about a lovely mental image!
     
  3. Well one of my pupils was writing an essay about a pilot having to ejaculate from his plane!

     
  4. Seen on a Year 7 RE wall display: "The Khalsa was the Sith brotherhood..."
     
  5. The following lines from Wilfred Owen's Disabled "Now he will never feel again how slim / Girls' waists are..." once led to me having to read a student's essay with the line "He will never again be able to touch a girl's waste" which had me laughing for days.
     
  6. ga8g08

    ga8g08 New commenter

    Can't work out how to create a new post, so just replying:
    When marking top set Year 7 essays on 'A Christmas Carol,' I was feeling encouraged to note that my high-ability group seemed to be doing really well, and was enjoying reading their rather more sophisticated responses, until I came across this gem of a conclusion: "I think that Charles Dickens created the changing character of Scrooge to show that anyone can change, even dirty, low-life scum."
    I also had a rather mortifying clanger in a set 3 Year 7 class: pupils had been asked to invent a new verb, assign a meaning to it, and then write a sentence using it in order for other students to guess its meaning from the context. One boy, in all innocence, had created the word 'finname' (pronounced, as we found out, '<u>fin-</u>a-<u>mee</u>'), meaning 'help', and proceeded to read out his context sentence: "Miss, please can you finname?" Cue uproar from the rest of the class, whilst I tried to keep a straight face.
     
  7. Apparently Dickens had 'altitudes towards the education system in 'Hard Times'! Always good to have something to lighten the mood when marking coursework - can't wait for moderation day [​IMG]
     
  8. Whilst marking year 8 maths tests which asked for the reason that angle h was 80 degrees, I learnt that as well as being an alternate angle, angle h was also alternative and articulate. I just couldn't stop laughing!
     
  9. When moderating GCSE coursework last week, a student quoted Romeo as saying, "Genital Mercutio, put thee reaper up." A hilarious moment to break up the sombre process!
     
  10. Marking some lit essays the other day and I was tickled to find out that 'the first animal Lennie kills in Of Mice and Men is a mousse'!!!!
    I now can't get this out of my head and can frequently be found doing mousse impressions to the rest of the department. I am dreading reading this to a class next year as I can see myself dissolving into fits of giggles whenever I see the word mouse and translate it into mousse in my head. Oh dear!!
    It has provoked much hilarity in the department.


     
  11. Marking An Inspector Calls essays: "All the characters feel uncomfortable because of the inspector's penetration." Suggests a rather different version of the play doesn't it?
     
  12. I'm getting told off by my other half for laughing loudly and randomly but never mind. My favourite part of APP is marking with other teachers and reading out classics.

    In my Y3 class - writing an advert for a Princess bride

    "She should dance for money and be clever so that when she's dancing she can count her money."

    Obviously not spelt like that at all but completely innocent - one of the sweetest little girls in my class. Future ambitions perhaps?
     
  13. princessdani22

    princessdani22 New commenter

    I love reading the funny things the children write.. it's one of the best parts of being a teacher!
    I'm doing my PGCE and I used to spend ages laughing at some of the things the children wrote,
    Some that spring to mind are;
    We had a lesson on the Egyptians and I gave them a picture of some egyptian statues of men and women and they had to think of questions they wanted to find the answer to about those people, and one little girl wrote 'Can you drive?'
    Another was during an English SAT practice lesson where the children had to do a piece of descriptive writing about a 'busy place'. One little boy decided to ignore the suggested options and decided to write about going to a club, drinking vodka and getting into a fight. (I didn't laugh at this one.. he was Year 6 and I was a bit freaked out he was writing about these things.. but it did make me wonder how it would be marked, as technically he did write about a busy nightclub and all of his spelling etc was correct?)
     
  14. Doing my AFL / ASL bit with a top set Yr 10 class I asked them to mark their own algebra and write a comment about their progress. One confident lad proclaimed himself to be a 'genious'. How ironic!
     
  15. Year 5 maths test
    Show your working...
    the child had drawn a detailed picture of himself working at his desk!
     
  16. well i was marking a GCSE paper on Romeo and Juliet and the question was how does Romeo's character change throughout the play and one girl answered:
    "well it doesn't its just self self self all the way through!"
     
  17. Year 3 writing in first person as an Egyptian embalmer using canopic jars: 'I put the lungs into my Hapy jar then began raping the mummy....' (wrapping!)
     
  18. And a small typo could make that even funnier! (And is, I admit, how I first read it! Oh dear....)
     
  19. My favourite was when one of my colleagues (a science lecturer) had given his students a diagram of various organs of the body and asked them to label it correctly.
    Someone labelled the pancreas the 'asparagus' which gave us a good laugh!
    http://theforbiddenlecturesoflizzielove.blogspot.com

     
  20. I am doing a primary education course in Leeds, and am on placement at the moment.
    I recently taught a lesson on using calculators to solve word problems in year 4, and I deliberatly made my top set's questions quite difficult. When it came to traffic light-ing their work, one boy refused to pick a coloured pencil. Why I asked why, he said
    "Miss it's beyond red, it was so hard it doesn't even deserve a colour."
    I told him to just use red then and write a comment on why it was hard. When it came to marking it, he had written:
    "This was harder than life is worth. I don't ever want to do this again."
    Woops!
     

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